gradgradgradddddd Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 So you're expressing dislike of people considering opinions from others that may or may not be relevant when making one of the biggest life choices ever by...expecting these people to consider your opinion that may or may not be relevant... Okay. "Dream school" =/= right choice. They aren't gross, selfish, or awful by carefully considering their opinions instead of pouncing on an acceptance out of emotion/excitement. not expecting anyone to consider my opinion... just saying that there's a lot of selfabsorption in the room. how quickly we forget what it's like to be on the torturous waiting end! these are the kinds of attitudes that carry forward into academia and shows how profs can completely guiltlessly put applicants thru hell during app season. apply your very powerful brain for a day or two, consult everyone you need to consult, and make a decision. because of this dawdling and "WEEEEE I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DOOOOO HEE HEE!" some people will have to make the tough choice of turning down offers to gamble for a wait list offer that may come after april 15. it's awful. hreaðemus, elkheart, xolo and 8 others 1 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheshire_Cat Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 I think we are all self absorbed, on all "sides" Lets all remember that people are people are people. There are monsters in the world, but lets not create more because we aren't getting our way. Most people aren't hanging on several acceptances because they want to torture those on the wait list, and the people on the wait list aren't less qualified, and may have the same credentials as those considering multiple acceptances. It is the luck of the draw. Those with several acceptances- Be considerate, if you know you aren't going to accept, then tell them so. Those waiting- be patient and don't create villains where there are none. It is a long and painful process for everyone involved. Lets not make it more painful by attacking eachother. serenade, Shamrock_Frog, Nomad1111 and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robo_Lizard Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 I'm in the same boat, guys. Chose yesterday school A over school B. Feeling so bad =( At some point I happy that all this torture finally ended, but I had to tell a nice professor from school B who tells me "I'm lucky to get your application, you are so interesting candidate!" that I chose different school...OMG that's the hardest experience ever! =*( When I wrote him email (I couldn't call...I'd be cried I guess...) explaining situation, he emailed me back " School A is lucky to get you!" I just cried...it's too emotional for me! I'm still doubtful that I made a right choice, and I won't regret. But thinking again about the whole reasons I had to choose school A, I think it seems a right decision...I guess I need a couple weeks for recovery now... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xor Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Bananasinpyjamas and Serenade I know exactly how you feel! Before I finally accepted the Notre Dame offer some weeks ago, almost everyone I know in the US was telling me that I will need to learn to adjust from living in a tropical climate almost all of my life, to one of the colder locations in the US. Like I didn't already feel emotional enough! Sigh. Congrats, by the way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
serenade Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 Bananasinpyjamas and Xor, what programs are you going into, if you don't mind my asking?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
serenade Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 Xor: Cool! I'm in the humanities. I'm still waiting for the grad school to email me all that info about NetID etc. I accepted on Wed and when I called, they said it might take a few days for the email to arrive, but I agree--I'd like to do it asap. I talked to the grad coordinator for my dept to see if I can register for classes now, but he said I had to wait until August. And about housing: I leased on an apartment at the Overlook so at least that's already done! Sorry everyone for hijacking this into a Notre Dame thread! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brown_eyed_girl Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 I really relate to this thread. I got into 3 programs and one was far and away the best offer, so the decision of where to attend was thankfully very easy, and I accepted almost a month before the deadline. Even then, though, there have been a lot of emotions - stress and apprehension about only having a couple months to plan my move 2500 miles across the country and anxiety about being so far away from my friends and family and adjusting to a new city with real winters a different lifestyle than I'm accustomed to. Then there's the anxiety about going from only having an undergrad degree and going into a PhD program, where many of my peers will already have masters degrees behind them and be much more seasoned than me. And there are the general fears about the job market and the knowledge that I'm dedicating 7 years of my life to something without any guarantees. Mostly it's very exciting and I am grateful and thrilled to be on this journey and be one of the lucky ones this application season. I think the changes will ultimately spur a lot of growth and I know I can handle them.But even under the best of circumstances, preparing for grad school is a HUGE transition and commitment -- whether of time, money, or blood, sweat, and tears. I'm not the emotional type, but this whole process has been emotional for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
setite Posted April 19, 2015 Share Posted April 19, 2015 I am with you on the emotional side, except my emotions, just like my ADHD brain chemistry, are asymptomatic. I usually don't stress about things so I was super stressed (relatively speaking) during the application process. I remember being super stressed when I opened each letter of rejection, but when I finally got an acceptance I sort of shut down and got super calm. Everyone was super excited for me and I pretended to be too but I wasn't. I am super excited and happy and all that, I just seem to have reacted by being calm. My mother was always super overtly excited about things so I think I adapted behaviors to reign her in that I still have I am 100% with you on the lack of motivation for the last of my undergrad coursework. I have never missed class so much as I have since my first acceptance came in. The only class that I've decided to put more effort into is my Statistics for the Behavioral Sciences II, because I talked to the grad student who teaches it and he pointed out that he designed the class as a primer for grad school statistics. If I actually learn the things he is teaching instead of memorizing enough to get the grade I want, I'll have a leg up next year. I had some undergrad research I was going to work on but I've decided to put that on hold. I'll poke it with a stick to see if it can be used for my empirical thesis but I really need to see if it will work. If it works out it could be significant, but it was born out of a brainstorm for a single undergrad course, not sure if it will pan out. About my atypical response, interestingly, I was poking through my DNA results at 23andMe and found that I have G;G in the warrior/worrier gene Rs4680. Which means I'm a warrior! I also have a C in the other warrior proxy gene Rs909525. I know how questionable these gene things are for self-diagnosing, but I wanted to show my dad that ADHD is a real thing, though he also doesn't believe anything posted in a research journal. It'd be interesting if anyone else here posted their warrior gene results if they have them. I wonder if the calm thing holds out or not. P.S. Even though the season is over. The guidelines that grad schools follow have suggestions for multiple offers. You are supposed to rank your offers, and whenever an offer of lesser rank comes in you are supposed to decline it and only hold one offer at a time. If you really can't decided between two that's one thing, but future people, try and decide the rank of programs so you don't have to hold multiple offers in limbo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amoeba_chica Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I think I might be the opposite. I received rejection after rejection and had just lost ALL motivation to finish. After all, what did it matter? It did not matter how hard I hard worked because nobody wanted me. FINALLY, I received an offer of admission from my TOP choice (to whom I almost did not apply, simply because it was too far away). So in short my answer is yes, I am CRAZY emotional. I was ON AIR when I finally got to tell my undergraduate advisor, not only that I HAD gotten in, but WHERE. Going straight from BS to PhD is TERRIFYING but I am also incredibly excited, but I have all the motivation in the world to finish my BS with the best grades possible, because I came incredibly close to not having a placement in the fall. I am INCREDIBLY excited (AND terrified) to be embarking on my PhD in the fall! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamrock_Frog Posted April 24, 2015 Share Posted April 24, 2015 yaaa no.... people in this thread are saying that "they know they should pick their dream school" but insist on being neurotic and beating the question to death by asking everyone and anyone their opinion. even when all of those opinions align with "pick the dream school" these people STILL don't decline offers. you people are gross, selfish and awful. So did you get accepted anywhere? Are you just projecting your frustration onto others? You come across as self-absorbed and entitled. Interesting, considering what you accuse others of doing. You seem to have a lot of growing up to do. mb712 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashlée Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 Yessss. God, yes. Unfortunately... yes. I've been emotional. I've not been to the point of crying yet (although I did cry happy tears when I received my acceptance), and now that all my required visa and financial aid forms are in and there's nothing for me to do but wait, I've become extremely antsy. Anxiety has increased tenfold and today I had to put on calming piano music and lavender incense in an effort to force myself to chill out. I'm just so worried that something is going to go wrong with the visa or financial aid stuff. Even though my school has accepted me, it's still not 100% that I'm going. And if I don't... I've no idea what I'm going to do. So... yeah. Fun stuff! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy_Pilgrim Posted April 18, 2017 Share Posted April 18, 2017 I am very comforted by this post. Today I had to email my ideal POI that I would not be able to attend due to funding issues. I seriously cried. I know it is silly, but I loved everything about the program except the available funding. I had to accept an offer in which I will not be choosing a mentor until I get there due to the amount of funding they offered me. This stressessss me out. I'm trying to make the best of it right now; I'm just hoping I will end up finding a lot I like about my new program. I'm pretty sure I'll be thinking about this for years to come. It seriously felt like a breakup. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinaminoTeku Posted April 18, 2017 Share Posted April 18, 2017 I'm feeling emotionally excited to be starting a new chapter in my life. Not really worried so much about the workload as I am about surviving on my own in terms of money. I just hope the amount I make will be enough to live somewhat comfortably off of. I just want to be done working right now so I can focus all my time on my research and seeing people before I take off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angesradieux Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 I'm so glad someone posted this. My emotions are all over the place lately, and I'm getting really tired of the "Are you excited? You must be so excited!" conversations. I'm so glad someone posted this. I'm getting really tired of the "Are you excited? You must be so excited!" conversations. On the one hand, yeah. It is exciting. But the excitement kind of comes and goes in waves. Like yesterday I started looking at home stuff like "I bet these pillows would look great in my new apartment" and just thinking about picking color schemes/decorating/etc. and I was totally cool with it. But other days I'm really nervous and anxious about moving and don't want to think about it, or I start to feel sad and melancholy about leaving home and the people and places I'm familiar with. It's just been an insane emotional roller coaster. But I've started blaring some Christian rock in my car lately, and I've found that's helped calm me down a little. It could be part of the reason I was able to look at home stuff yesterday without experiencing the "Wait what? I'm really moving?" anxiety. I don't know. Sometimes I'm okay, sometimes I'm excited, and sometimes I'm just a train wreck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cheesecafe Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 On 4/20/2017 at 8:51 AM, angesradieux said: I'm so glad someone posted this. My emotions are all over the place lately, and I'm getting really tired of the "Are you excited? You must be so excited!" conversations. I'm so glad someone posted this. I'm getting really tired of the "Are you excited? You must be so excited!" conversations. On the one hand, yeah. It is exciting. But the excitement kind of comes and goes in waves. Like yesterday I started looking at home stuff like "I bet these pillows would look great in my new apartment" and just thinking about picking color schemes/decorating/etc. and I was totally cool with it. But other days I'm really nervous and anxious about moving and don't want to think about it, or I start to feel sad and melancholy about leaving home and the people and places I'm familiar with. It's just been an insane emotional roller coaster. But I've started blaring some Christian rock in my car lately, and I've found that's helped calm me down a little. It could be part of the reason I was able to look at home stuff yesterday without experiencing the "Wait what? I'm really moving?" anxiety. I don't know. Sometimes I'm okay, sometimes I'm excited, and sometimes I'm just a train wreck. I feel this way exactly. I am almost starting to wish some people didn't know I was going to grad school--namely acquaintances at work who bring it up every chance they get. The line between anxiety and excitement feels very thin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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