I feel this. I'm on one waitlist and have 9 pending programs (of those, possibly 2 or 3 implied rejections). This has been so tough and up until a few days ago I was having a very hard time, imagining nonstop what it would be like to get shut out, and feeling completely lost. I'm still afraid, and it will hurt a lot if this cycle ends disappointingly for me, but I've just become so tired of the emotional roller coaster that I was able to fully bring myself to that 'it's out of my hands now; there's no way to predict anything; whatever happens, I'll just take it one step at a time.' If this cycle is a wash for me (and I do still have some hope it may not be), then I'll try again. Just thinking about writing up new applications, reworking writing samples, going through the waiting game again, and—most of all—asking my professors to write a third round of reference letters (they recommended me for my MA, as well as this PhD cycle) scares me so much, but I just keep reminding myself that there is nothing I can do right now at all, and if I do come to a position in which I have to try again, all I can do is try. I can't predict if I'll have the energy, the resources, if I'll be able to get references, etc., so what's the use in stressing about it now? I'm just wearing myself out that way.
I know this probably doesn't help, but I just wanted to write all this to let you know, as others have already done, that you're definitely not alone. This entire process is the most gruelling thing I've been through, and it has a uniquely awful way of wearing out a person in a myriad of different ways. It's tough seeing people get really great news over and over, as happy as we all are for them, but we just have to keep reminding ourselves that admission decisions are incredibly complex and in large part depend on chance.