mandarin.orange
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Posts posted by mandarin.orange
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Rant: this whole week.
• watching a proposal we (a service committee) worked 6 months on turn to dust, by way of a shit storm of group emails.
• admitted students are visiting. We (me + roomie) volunteered to host and were set up with someone who ultimately flaked...crashed at another grad's place after out drinking? Wasted confusion and time on our part.
• samples that took twice as long to process as the ones before were set in an oven w/ temp. set too high. Finding their shriveled-up, useless forms when I opened the oven Fri afternoon pretty much summed up the week.
Worst is, to make time for all this, I put off a few real interesting emails from outside collaborators re. research. I should've spent my time there, happily chasing down their questions and perusing new data.
And I am never, ever volunteering for service again while in grad school...whatever job after this, any service I even consider had better have a measurable benefit towards tenure.
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Abysmally bad idea.
My favorite article about it is here.
The line that gets me most: "we are...being sold the lie that Alberta tar sands oil is conflict-free oil, gotten by scraping away the boreal forest of Canada - the great lungs of North America, one of our last hopes for temperance against rising CO2 levels."
I did fieldwork in the Ft. McMurray area about ten years ago, in winter. While I never care to repeat the experience of -38 ˚C on unnamed lakes, I've yet to see another landscape so pristine.
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That sounds really interesting, or maybe it's just reminding me of Loric's parody thread.
I too was trying to think of a clever way to reference that thread...
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So I submitted mine and it's not posted yet; I'm confused because I thought it was the funniest ever. I don't know how this works, if they are actually moderating/approving these things, or doling them out in carefully-spaced intervals, but great, one more site for me to constantly refresh and be obsessed with.
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Anyone else following @lolmythesis? Seems to have taken off over the holiday break.
I submitted mine. This just may be my latest favorite distraction. WhatShouldWeCallGradSchool still holds a special place in my heart, but then again, those .gifs just take so long to load...
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I agree with everything Usmivka has said. I'd recommend posting your concerns about living independently on reddit, and see what you get...or, at the very least, browsing that site. You'll probably find lots of likeminded posts already there, and greater volume of folks willing to offer some valuable advice.
- gellert, SocGirl2013 and LittleDarlings
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I will try not to think that by 30 my eggs will be rotten.
One of my favorite rebuttals to this (inaccurate, not scientifically proven) idea is the following article. Love, love, LOVE that she uses a Tiny Fey, Amy Poehler et al. SNL bit as part of her supporting evidence:
How Long Can You Wait to Have a Baby?
Oh my freaking goodness! I took an undergrad course from her years ago!
Awesome! I am secretly hoping that she lectures exactly like she writes/blogs...would be hilarious.
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This blog post (from today) reminded me of this thread and (grudgingly) roused me to participate again. Love her no-holds-barred language about having a baby while in academia.
Five Things I Say to Career Women Who Tell Me They Want To Have a Baby
- Queen of Kale and NatureGurl
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I just want everyone in life to be as miserable as me because my life sucks.
WOW.
...and you're going into social work...?
- 28verses, umniah2013, hj2012 and 2 others
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you don't care about the plight of single me.
On the contrary, I've been amazed at the response generated in the 24 hours between the posts I've made this weekend. There are many here (a few quite long-time grad-cafers) who've taken the time to write incredibly articulate responses, about experiences close to home for them (i.e. their romantic life) in the hopes that it will help shift your perspective. Four pages of replies in a week is quite voluminous for gradcafe.
Sorry it hasn't been helpful for you.
- dat_nerd, CageFree, Academicat and 3 others
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Anyways Mandarin, do you ever worry a little that you won't find someone?
What an interesting (and, ahem, telling) follow-up question...I actually just passed the 5-year mark with my fantastic BF.
I guess describing myself as "unmarried" means I'm single/alone/no prospects...and anxious about this?
Of all the things in life, I have always felt that planning marriage, love and a relationship is the stickiest. I have many friends who would make great parents, and were eager to do so, and it just didn't work out. Your degree, staying fit, travel, career, and generally being awesome: barring any family or health crisis, that's largely up to you.
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I think you realize the point of the "desperately seeking perfection" photo...
Actually, the woman eagerly raising her hand was me outing myself as a (quite happily) unmarried, child-free woman in her 30s.
- 695005, AuDorBust, oddlyartless and 1 other
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Lol yeah right... then no one would date me.
If that's your true mindset, though, isn't it best to be up-front? Why jump through hoops to hide your true eagerness to have a husband and family, just to get more responses, hits on the page, and dates? At some point any blossoming prospect will have to be aware of your fixed timeline as things get serious, and then it becomes blindsiding or "crazy-making" if this is something you previously tried to "play it cool" or conceal as "too crazy." Hence the "I don't want a girlfriend" or "I don't want to maintain this long-distance" exits.
I'm all about full disclosure. There are men out there equally as eager to start families.
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To me it is like now or never because who wants to be 30 and single with no prospects and no kids?
I'm 23 almost, I have about 2 more years to meet a suitable person date them for a year and a half and get engaged, married and have my first baby. Assuming I meet the person tomorrow that still puts me at about 27 or 28 for a baby, assuming I want more than 1 kid I have about 5 years for 2 more. That is if I meet someone tomorrow which is pretty unlikely. So if I wait don't meet someone until 25 I will be 30 having my first kid my egg quality will have gone down and that's bad. I have a lot to think about! If it were up to me I would have been in a serious relationship at 21 engaged by 23 and married at 24 then I would be in grad school, married and hopefully pregnant or trying to get pregnant. I just feel like I will have so much stress off of me when I get into a good lasting relationship.
If this is what you want and your mindset, I encourage you to put exactly this, verbatim, into your online dating profile.
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Thank you both. I do try to vary activity now, but my morning section really drags. I stare at them for long intervals and wait for someone to speak after I pose questions...works somewhat; generally someone can't take the tension and speaks up. Will check out these resources!
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This year I'm a TA leading discussion sections, after a two year break from any sort of teaching after my stint as a high school teacher. Thus far I've run my sections with a combination of slides w/ pics to reinforce lecture topics, discuss these ?s with small groups of peers, me leading a follow-up discussion, going over rubrics for next assignment, and video clips. However, I fear this is the same "mode" I'd used when planning the days for my HS courses. Students today in particular were drifting off or a bit passive, after they felt they'd made their 1 or 2 contributions for their participation points for the day. This may reflect a deeper-seated fear of having to be "on" for the entire 2 hour duration, which strikes me as an awful long time.
So, how can I be a better discussion facilitator? Or, any ideas for activities, prep, additional prep students could do (instead of 1 page pre-writing responses) that are more appropriate for college students?
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I applied to two schools. Rejected by one, accepted (with bells on) from the other, which has been an excellent fit and with someone I'd wanted to work with for years who's now my advisor.
Throughout the process, I was 75% sure I'd have to follow my plan B, which was to continue working for two more years, and then apply to a wider swath of schools.
If it feels right for you, do it. I personally was gobsmacked to read the "how much did you spend on applications?" thread that was kicking around here a few years ago, and seeing four-digit figures.
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Also, a second question about LOR - is it normal/alright for me to get an LOR from a professor who teaches in a subject that is not my major? I'm a
Sure! If she can attest to your writing, ideas, and promise as a scholar - and has offered - this sounds like a no-brainer. I had spent time away from academia, and I actually only had one academic/professor LOR when I (successfully) applied to the school I wanted...the other two were from former supervisors, who could attest to my work as a teacher/educator, and in a government job.
As far as writing your own, I think I would avoid. I've proofread my own LOR from my MS advisor (he was quite dyslexic so I was used to his requests to serve as editor), and I now "ghost write" the LORs for undergrads that work in our lab that my advisor signs. But I haven't heard of someone, esp. an undergrad, writing their own letter outright. I would imagine the similarity in writing styles between that and SOP could be recognized.
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Figure out your paper topics for classes ASAP, although I think that's a general piece of advice for everyone.
This is a great point I forgot. After a couple quarters, I got super selective re. classes and wouldn't really take any where I didn't already have a topic in mind that I wanted to research either as part of my dissertation, or one of my secondary research interests.
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I'm starting a program at a university that uses the quarter system. I have always attended schools on the semester system. Does anybody have insight on adapting to quarters?
Get ready for a 10-week flat-out sprint.
I was used to teaching on a semester system (high school) where there were natural "lulls," so we had time to take 3 and 4-day weekends on occasion, travel to conferences and out-of-town locales for fun. I could show "Planet Earth" eps to my Earth Science kids, or time to do an easy project or lab after testing.
There is no such time in the quarter system. My first term, I planned a 4-day weekend to visit the long-distance BF. I was grading constantly on the plane, during the visit, felt it took me almost 2 weeks to feel some modicum of "caught-up." I also worked all day, every day during Thanksgiving break.
Make friends and study groups in your more difficult classes so that you can jigsaw the material and help each other. Spend a good chunk of most weekends working, esp. if you throw conference presentations and travel in the mix.
Otherwise I really enjoy having about 3-4 weeks off for the holidays, and starting the academic year end-of-Sept.
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I am now scared that I won't be able to develop a good relationship with my POI in the PhD program, or that my old mentor will tank my success in the future. What can I do to ensure that I have a better relationship with my current POI? Is there anything I can do to remedy the situation with old mentor, or should I just leave it be? The relationship with my old mentor has caused me a lot of anxiety and has made me feel extremely depressed; I even question whether I'm cut out for this career if my mentor despises me so much.
I realize this thread has sat for a week or more, but just came across the excellent blog "Tenure She Wrote." Today's post addresses specifically this, including a great section on "Avoiding Toxic Relationships" --
2014 Applicant Profiles and Admissions Results
in Earth Sciences Forum
Posted
I got word of my acceptance (3 years ago) when I called the student affairs officer at the program I'd applied for, and inquired outright. If a similar staff person has been the primary contact in handling the app process for you (and, will ultimately handle much of your paperwork when you're enrolled), that is a good person to contact.