Venting Thread - 2019 Applicants

[Coconuts&Chloroform]

I've seen this in years past, but not this year, so I thought I'd put one up. 

This is a thread for 2019 applicants to vent their post-submission frustrations, anxieties and hopes; to spread rumors about the mysterious machinations in which AdComs are now engaged; and to offer each other support as we wait out the limbo in which we will be kept for the coming months. 

I'll begin: in 2016 I applied to a very small handful of schools, with NYU as my top choice. I ended up going for an MA and trying again. But when submitting my application to NYU this year, I noticed that the status of my 2016 admission was "Awaiting Payment". WTF? Did they ever even consider my application that year? I spent months that year religiously checking my email and thegradcafe, hoping to find out when they would accept or reject me. Could it all be because I forgot to pay them?

[sisyphushappy]

I just noticed a grammatical error in the first sentence of my writing sample. I mistakenly used an apostrophe (') instead of an end quotation mark (").The rest of my paper is absolutely perfect grammatically. 

I have already submitted it to five schools. My GRE was nothing special (165V, 151Q, 4.5A), and neither is my GPA (3.52, after a strong upward trend). There's just too many reasons they could potentially toss out my application at this point, so this mistake feels like the final nail in the coffin.

(I do have four strong recommendations and many awards from UG. I also have put in a considerable amount of effort to continue studying philosophy after UG by auditing graduate classes, participating in reading groups with faculty members, and attending summer programs. But it may be worse to have reasons for optimism at this point.)

Edited January 9, 2020 by sisyphushappy

[Losebeforeapply]

I am a non-English speaker who studied in a non-elite UG in US. And I guess I had a PTSD on revising my writing sample since I was not satisfied with the argument but I couldn't find a way to fix it. My adviser (the only professor who matches my AOI in the department) was on leave this semester so that I couldn't get sufficient advice for fine-tuning the content of the paper (I am not blaming him. He helped me a lot in revising the paper. He just did not have enough time to read the paper thoroughly). I felt extremely anxious and disappointing every time when I reread it so that I tried to avoid reading it to escape from anxiety (I know this is just an excuse and I should definitely check everything). I didn't check grammar by myself after letting several professors read the paper. I thought that they will find the typo if there is any (I did revise the typos which they marked). Finally, after submitting three applications I was calm down a little bit and checked the grammar. I found many typos and that my introduction section is not well written. I fixed them, but all the three programs are great, and I guess I miss the shot. Though I applied to a huge list of phd/MA programs, they are all in a pretty high rank and now I am worrying about being shut out...

Edited January 10, 2020 by Losebeforeapply

[Coconuts&Chloroform]

8 hours ago, sisyphushappy said:

I just noticed a grammatical error in the first sentence of my writing sample. I mistakenly used an apostrophe (') instead of an end quotation mark (").The rest of my paper is absolutely perfect grammatically. 

I have already submitted it to five schools. My GRE was nothing special (165V, 151Q, 4.5A), and neither is my GPA (3.52, after a strong upward trend). There's just too many reasons they could potentially toss out my application at this point, so this mistake feels like the final nail in the coffin.

(I do have four strong recommendations and many awards from UG. I also have put in a considerable amount of effort to continue studying philosophy after UG by auditing graduate classes, participating in reading groups with faculty members, and attending summer programs. But it may be worse to have reasons for optimism at this point.)

Don't sweat this. Have you ever seen what professional philosophers' paper drafts look like before they are sent to be refereed by journals? Find any philosopher's webpage, take a look at any papers that they have marked as 'unpublished' or 'draft for circulation', and you will be amazed how sloppy some of the grammar is. 

Nobody is going to reject you because of a punctuation error in your paper. What matters is whether or not it is rigorous, compelling, and scholarly.

[musicdegree4me]

2020 applicant, but I have a reference in parentheticals where the the name of the scholar I quoted got changed by spellcheck to a common noun. So as a representative example it went from something like (Chasu, 2019) to (Chase, 2019). 
 

Just caught it. It’s driving me absolutely insane. 
 

 

Edited January 11, 2020 by musicdegree4me

[sisyphushappy]

Thank you so much for the responses. I took a day to process my stress and feel so much better now. I submitted my last application a few hours ago, so now it’s time for the waiting game!

[seuil-limite]

My writing sample got ripped apart two weeks before my first apps where due. I ended calling out of work for two days and not sleeping just to get something submittable. The second wave of applications due I had a much more presentable paper. My anxiety is mostly around this paper.

My topic is original and as far as anyone can tell no one has seriously engaged with this in the literature. My argument is strong but I'm more worried about the mechanics of writing. So at this point I am just riding on the hope that my originality outweighs any silly issue in my writing. 

I was rejected from all programs I applied to last year and I'm glad I was because I found so many wonderful programs in the meantime. I am a much stronger applicant then I was last cycle but I have so much anxiety around getting a single acceptance. 

Anyways! All of my applications are in and all I can do is wait and hope for the best. I have essentially just been living by this quote from Mary Shelly's Frankenstein:

"I am resigned to the fate awaiting me. Learn from me, dear lady, to submit in patience to the will of heaven!"

 

 

[Coconuts&Chloroform]

9 hours ago, seuil-limite said:

I have essentially just been living by this quote from Mary Shelly's Frankenstein:

"I am resigned to the fate awaiting me. Learn from me, dear lady, to submit in patience to the will of heaven!"

That's a good one.

In critical periods in one's life like this I always find myself reading Ecclesiastes:

"If the clouds be full of rain, they empty themselves upon the earth: and if the tree fall toward the south, or toward the north, in the place where the tree falleth, there it shall be. He that observeth the wind shall not sow; and he that regardeth the clouds shall not reap."

We're all waiting to see where the tree falls.

Edited January 17, 2020 by Coconuts&Chloroform

[sisyphushappy]

I have an idea for a mood boost! When was the moment that you all decided you were going to apply to grad school in philosophy?

For me, it was during my senior year while I was still pre-law. I met with my independent study advisor for an outdoor class session and had told him my fears about burnout and consequently being ineffective as a lawyer. I had never even thought about academic philosophy prior to that conversation, but essentially he said that I could do more good as a philosopher than a burnout lawyer. After all, Marx’s ideas changed the world, so why wouldn’t mine?

I know my professor was being overly optimistic and idealistic, and that he is biased from being one of the people who have “made it” already. I also know that radical/activist philosophers claim they’ll continue to be radical in academia, but they can’t in the end — so I’ll commit to doing public philosophy on my own time.

But it was definitely a life-changing moment. (This was nearly three years ago and I still think about this conversation.)

[Eheydon]

4 hours ago, sisyphushappy said:

I have an idea for a mood boost! When was the moment that you all decided you were going to apply to grad school in philosophy?

For me, the decision wasn’t really solidified until the fall of my 4th year. (I ended up switching to an undergrad philosophy track to graduate in five years, instead of four.) At the time, I was pursuing a science degree in the biology dept. at my university. I loved it but really couldn’t see a future in it...especially because, around that time, things started getting tense with my lab advisor (still not sure why, as I worked very hard for him), and I knew that he would never write me a decent letter of rec allowing me to get a PhD in biology. I was simultaneously working with [big name philosophy prof] on a philosophy project that required my scientific background. I was getting good grades in the philosophy stuff, and I found it a lot more enjoyable. So I decided to switch career paths. Of course, this led to a lot of upheaval in terms of paperwork and graduation, as I transferred out of the college of science and into the college of arts and letters four days before I was supposed to graduate from the college of science. It was a radical decision, yes, but I have exactly zero regrets. 

[Moose#@1%$]

On 1/9/2020 at 11:45 AM, Coconuts&Chloroform said:

I've seen this in years past, but not this year, so I thought I'd put one up. 

This is a thread for 2019 applicants to vent their post-submission frustrations, anxieties and hopes; to spread rumors about the mysterious machinations in which AdComs are now engaged; and to offer each other support as we wait out the limbo in which we will be kept for the coming months. 

I'll begin: in 2016 I applied to a very small handful of schools, with NYU as my top choice. I ended up going for an MA and trying again. But when submitting my application to NYU this year, I noticed that the status of my 2016 admission was "Awaiting Payment". WTF? Did they ever even consider my application that year? I spent months that year religiously checking my email and thegradcafe, hoping to find out when they would accept or reject me. Could it all be because I forgot to pay them?

I don't think so, when I applied last year to U of Pitt, my online profile or whatever had something very similar on there - "incomplete app" or some shit like that. But, I called them and they told me that they have received it, and that warning that I see is something to do with the Graduate school. I also read similar issues at different schools on here too. So, I wouldn't fret about it to much. I'm sure they got it.

[Mooo]

If you got a rejection letter

On 1/10/2020 at 1:45 AM, Coconuts&Chloroform said:

I'll begin: in 2016 I applied to a very small handful of schools, with NYU as my top choice. I ended up going for an MA and trying again. But when submitting my application to NYU this year, I noticed that the status of my 2016 admission was "Awaiting Payment". WTF? Did they ever even consider my application that year? I spent months that year religiously checking my email and thegradcafe, hoping to find out when they would accept or reject me. Could it all be because I forgot to pay them?

If you got a rejection letter from them, I'd be pretty confident they reviewed your application.

[modals]

hi all.

waiting is hard.

has anyone else’s sleep/diet been affected by the pre-decision letter anxiety?! ?

 

[musicdegree4me]

5 hours ago, expressivism said:

hi all.

waiting is hard.

has anyone else’s sleep/diet been affected by the pre-decision letter anxiety?! ?

 

Yes. 

/end

[Coconuts&Chloroform]

On 1/20/2020 at 8:01 AM, Mooo said:

If you got a rejection letter

If you got a rejection letter from them, I'd be pretty confident they reviewed your application.

Yeah, that's the thing. I didn't. I gave them a call in late March and was told that all acceptances had been sent out. So I reasoned that I must have been rejected. But I was not told that my application had been reviewed and rejected...

[Mooo]

13 hours ago, Coconuts&Chloroform said:

Yeah, that's the thing. I didn't. I gave them a call in late March and was told that all acceptances had been sent out. So I reasoned that I must have been rejected. But I was not told that my application had been reviewed and rejected...

Ooh idk then... This is my first round applying so I'm not sure if that's unusual or not.

Speaking of, will decisions start coming in end of Jan or is that optimistic?

[musicdegree4me]

2 hours ago, Mooo said:

Ooh idk then... This is my first round applying so I'm not sure if that's unusual or not.

Speaking of, will decisions start coming in end of Jan or is that optimistic?

They will trickle in and then the floodgates will start to open the week of Feb 10th. 

[syn]

8 hours ago, Mooo said:

Ooh idk then... This is my first round applying so I'm not sure if that's unusual or not.

Speaking of, will decisions start coming in end of Jan or is that optimistic?

Like music said, there's a few who will give acceptances out in late January, usually to those who they feel have a solid chance at a Fellowship. Most will be mid-February-ish.

Check out this sheet, on the 2020 Predictions tab there's a running list of predicted dates. Some of them are a little later than what I have down (for my schools, at least), but I think they're fairly good predictions: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1yb_yciijFGEp5roVKYJ40U4eiREo3ZQTeSQkEjGMSsg/edit#gid=339976266 .

[Coconuts&Chloroform]

Anybody interested in exchanging samples, mainly just for reassurance? I'm at the point now where I see nothing but the flaws of my paper, and I no longer believe the people who told me it was good (I'm not sure that my advisor really did anything more than skim my most recent draft...). If anyone else is feeling similarly, it might be nice to exchange our papers and get some feedback from a fresh, unbiased, anonymous source.

[Losebeforeapply]

4 hours ago, Coconuts&Chloroform said:

Anybody interested in exchanging samples, mainly just for reassurance? I'm at the point now where I see nothing but the flaws of my paper, and I no longer believe the people who told me it was good (I'm not sure that my advisor really did anything more than skim my most recent draft...). If anyone else is feeling similarly, it might be nice to exchange our papers and get some feedback from a fresh, unbiased, anonymous source.

I got the same feeling and I really understand the unease you feel. I keep worrying about the flaws of the sample even my advisor says that the sample is at least decent (indeed I am worrying about whether he just skims the paper). But I would suggest that we should not think too much about it now. Reassurance would not help much and there is nothing we can do now for the current round application... I guess we would better let it go and revise it latter to prepare for a new round if the result is not ideal. 

Edited January 22, 2020 by Losebeforeapply

[Eheydon]

On 1/20/2020 at 3:12 PM, expressivism said:

hi all.

waiting is hard.

has anyone else’s sleep/diet been affected by the pre-decision letter anxiety?! ?

 

I mean, my sleep/diet was already messed up from staying up late to submit all these applications, but....

[Coconuts&Chloroform]

8 hours ago, Losebeforeapply said:

I got the same feeling and I really understand the unease you feel. I keep worrying about the flaws of the sample even my advisor says that the sample is at least decent (indeed I am worrying about whether he just skims the paper). But I would suggest that we should not think too much about it now. Reassurance would not help much and there is nothing we can do now for the current round application... I guess we would better let it go and revise it latter to prepare for a new round if the result is not ideal. 

What else can help in a time like this but reassurance?

[modals]

7 hours ago, Eheydon said:

I mean, my sleep/diet was already messed up from staying up late to submit all these applications, but....

yeah. agreed. but the time zoomed by while preparing apps. now it’s at a slow crawl. requires a diff kind of coping!

who is applying while still taking courses? who decided to wait until after graduation?

 

[Mooo]

45 minutes ago, expressivism said:

yeah. agreed. but the time zoomed by while preparing apps. now it’s at a slow crawl. requires a diff kind of coping!

who is applying while still taking courses? who decided to wait until after graduation?

 

Us Australians finish our academic year in November. So I finished, realised I had to take this thing called the "GRE", gave a last-minute attempt at that, and then spent a month doing applications bahaha

 

[sisyphushappy]

16 hours ago, Eheydon said:

I mean, my sleep/diet was already messed up from staying up late to submit all these applications, but....

I feel this, I still can’t believe what the combination of NYE and December 31-January 7 deadlines did to my sleep schedule.