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Sh*t people say when you are applying to grad school


Clou12

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Oh yeah, the scrunched up faces or the mouths agape when you tell someone it is going to take 5-6. You would think I told them I am going to jail.

From conversations with TAs and Professors at my undergrad, not only does it seem common, it seems expected that Ph.D.s in our field take 6-8 years, rather than 5-6 like others. Every time I've brought up this figure, the person I'm talking to looks horrified. But when you love what you want to study, doesn't 6-8 years sound like awesome?

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"So you're getting a Master's, then?"

"No, a Ph.D."

"But you don't have a Master's!"

"You can earn a Master's while you're in a Ph.D. program after a couple of years."

"So you ARE applying for Master's programs."

"...No."

"...Wait, so what type of program are you applying to again?"

"Psychology Ph.D. programs."

"Oh, got it, so you want to be a therapist or something, huh?"

"--I give up."

Edited by gellert
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"You'll get in somewhere."

This is exactly what I have been told (in multiple occasions) when I was building a list of schools that I wanted to apply back in July/August. I was looking for inputs from a few professors who are in that/related field. My typical response (back then) was

"and where is that somewhere?"

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"Why did you apply to schools that are so far away and cold? You could just go to UT Austin."

"You want to study monkeys? And then what.. be a zoo keeper?"

Or my favorite from my 28 yr old neighbor just the other day--

Her: I want to apply to graduate school!

Me: That's great! For what?

Her: Oh, I don't know. But I want to live in Arizona so I guess I will go to Arizona state university.

Me: Wait, you don't know what you want to do? What was your undergrad degree?

Her: Psychology, but I don't know if I will like that. I really want to study the body.

Me: Um, ok so you mean you would like to be an MD?

Her: What? I don't know but I like Biology....

Me: I tell you what, why don't you start looking at graduate programs in Arizona and see what makes you happy.

(I'll help her along as much as I can, but I never met someone so full of excitement who had no idea what she should be excited about.)

Given that ASU is one of the top "party school" in the West... I think "study the body" refers to something less academic. B)

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"You'll get in somewhere."

This is exactly what I have been told (in multiple occasions) when I was building a list of schools that I wanted to apply back in July/August. I was looking for inputs from a few professors who are in that/related field. My typical response (back then) was

"and where is that somewhere?"

Right now? Hell's waiting room. The anxiety is a nightmare!

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"Why don't you just stay here and go to UF?" or "You're applying out-of-state?"

"How are you going to pay for it?"

"How many languages do you speak?" (If they don't know me well and hear "linguistics" - everyone who knows me well has heard the linguistics spiel)

"What about [my boyfriend]?"

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My roommate's all-too-frequent response to my all-too-frequent stress fests: "But it doesn't matter if you get in, that's not even your top choice school! So why are you stressing out?"

Me: "Because if I can't even get in here, how do I stand a chance to my top-choice schools?" Continues to stress about how I will have nothing to do next year.

Roommate's response: "It's okay, you can always live at home with your mom. Soooo much better than what you're doing now..."

*facepalm*

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Or my favorite from my 28 yr old neighbor just the other day--

Her: I want to apply to graduate school!

Me: That's great! For what?

Her: Oh, I don't know. But I want to live in Arizona so I guess I will go to Arizona state university.

Me: Wait, you don't know what you want to do? What was your undergrad degree?

Her: Psychology, but I don't know if I will like that. I really want to study the body.

Me: Um, ok so you mean you would like to be an MD?

Her: What? I don't know but I like Biology....

Me: I tell you what, why don't you start looking at graduate programs in Arizona and see what makes you happy.

(I'll help her along as much as I can, but I never met someone so full of excitement who had no idea what she should be excited about.)

I have a friend just like this. It wouldn't irritate me so much if she hadn't been really unsupportive of me during my whole application process (telling me I'd never get a job, my field sounds boring, etc).

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Recent conversation:

Guy: "So what did you apply to grad school for?"

Me: "Anthropology"

Guy: "Oh! That's so cool! You get to go to Egypt and dig up the pyramids and stuff!"

Me: "No, thats archeology. I do cultural anthropology. So I talk to people and try to better understand their culture."

Guy: "You talk to dead people?! How do you do that?"

::facepalm::

Me: "No, I talk to real live people."

Guy: "What do you do with that anyway? And what, are you just going to spend the rest of your life talking to people? How will you support yourself?"

Me: ...smh... "I'll write books" and with that I walked away

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"It can't be too hard to get in. I mean, there can't be that many students who are applying to Art History programs."

So, if I happen to be accepted to one of my top choice, very exclusive, absolutely fantastic programs, it's because there weren't that many students applying? *facepalm*

This. Also, after getting the typical "Of course you'l get in somewhere!", I was trying to explain that mine is a small field, it IS hard to get in, etc., and someone said "Well, can't you just apply in a different, easier field to get into, and then transfer?"

Also, my grandma, who is super excited about the idea of someone in the family going to grad school ("We've never had a Dr. ___!") keeps trying to "help" me by trying to get me to contact her friends. "Well, I once met the wife of Dr. So-and-so (in completely unrelated field), and I think he's emeritus (she's forgetten he's a little bit deceased)- you HAVE to call him and tell him you know me. He'll get you in!" I love her, but I've given up trying to explain how admissions works, and that art history and phschiatry aren't likely to be done by they same post-emeritus (late) professor.

Edit: also today I got "My friend just got into every law school she applied to- Harvard, Yale- all of them! You're as smart as she is, so you should be fine."

Edited by LLajax
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Also, my grandma, who is super excited about the idea of someone in the family going to grad school ("We've never had a Dr. ___!") keeps trying to "help" me by trying to get me to contact her friends. "Well, I once met the wife of Dr. So-and-so (in completely unrelated field), and I think he's emeritus (she's forgetten he's a little bit deceased)- you HAVE to call him and tell him you know me. He'll get you in!" I love her, but I've given up trying to explain how admissions works, and that art history and phschiatry aren't likely to be done by they same post-emeritus (late) professor.

Plan B: If I don't end up in grad school, I will move to Hollywood and write a script about a zombie admissions committee. :lol:

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Recent conversation:

Guy: "So what did you apply to grad school for?"

Me: "Anthropology"

Guy: "Oh! That's so cool! You get to go to Egypt and dig up the pyramids and stuff!"

Me: "No, thats archeology. I do cultural anthropology. So I talk to people and try to better understand their culture."

Guy: "You talk to dead people?! How do you do that?"

::facepalm::

Me: "No, I talk to real live people."

Guy: "What do you do with that anyway? And what, are you just going to spend the rest of your life talking to people? How will you support yourself?"

Me: ...smh... "I'll write books" and with that I walked away

My old dentist was insistent that I dug up dinosaurs when I said I was studying anthropology. I had to give up.

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Also, my grandma, who is super excited about the idea of someone in the family going to grad school ("We've never had a Dr. ___!") keeps trying to "help" me by trying to get me to contact her friends. "Well, I once met the wife of Dr. So-and-so (in completely unrelated field), and I think he's emeritus (she's forgetten he's a little bit deceased)- you HAVE to call him and tell him you know me. He'll get you in!" I love her, but I've given up trying to explain how admissions works, and that art history and phschiatry aren't likely to be done by they same post-emeritus (late) professor.

The amount of relatives who mean well but have no concept of graduate school is immense. I had to finally sit my mother down and TRY to help her understand, all in an effort to keep her from offering odd pieces of advice". It took quite a bit of time to explain how everything works and I answered every question she could think of. My mother is a very smart person too. Even after this though she still likes to say things like "You want to work in a cortisol lab this summer?" (insert my explanation of what cortisol is) ---- her next statement "My neighbor has a daughter who studies genetics at XYZ university. you should talk to her.".................. *sigh*

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Real convo I had when I first started my PhD (paraphrased):

Them: So, what do you do for a living?

Me: I'm a PhD student here at the University in Department XYZ.

Them: Oh, cool. So, you're going to be a doctor?

Me: Yeah.

Them: Then you can do surgery, or whatever?

Me: No. Actually, I'm in a non-medical field, so I'll still be called Dr. Awesome, but my area is XYZ.

Them: Oh. [lonnnnng pause while they think]. But, you COULD be a real doctor if you wanted to, right?

Me: I *will* be a real doctor, just not a medical doctor.

Them: But don't you want your own practice or something?

Me: Still not that kind of doctor... I'm going to teach XYZ as a professor, which is a non-medical field.

Them: Why would you teach, when you could work at a hospital or clinic or something and make more $$?

Me: [needing to end this useless convo]... Yeah... good point... I'll consider that...

[NOT ALL PHD's ARE MEDICAL YOU IDIOT!!!]

<headdesk>

Haha! I like your final response to "them."

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Real convo I had when I first started my PhD (paraphrased):

Them: So, what do you do for a living?

Me: I'm a PhD student here at the University in Department XYZ.

Them: Oh, cool. So, you're going to be a doctor?

Me: Yeah.

Them: Then you can do surgery, or whatever?

Me: No. Actually, I'm in a non-medical field, so I'll still be called Dr. Awesome, but my area is XYZ.

Them: Oh. [lonnnnng pause while they think]. But, you COULD be a real doctor if you wanted to, right?

Me: I *will* be a real doctor, just not a medical doctor.

Them: But don't you want your own practice or something?

Me: Still not that kind of doctor... I'm going to teach XYZ as a professor, which is a non-medical field.

Them: Why would you teach, when you could work at a hospital or clinic or something and make more $$?

Me: [needing to end this useless convo]... Yeah... good point... I'll consider that...

[NOT ALL PHD's ARE MEDICAL YOU IDIOT!!!]

<headdesk>

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0MLfytSssE

:lol:

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