NinjaMermaid

I think "crazy" is a bit harsh. I would say that as a new grad student these feelings are perfectly normal, but I would not act on them. Try to think about how this new student could inspire you, always search for the bright spot in situations. Don't stress unless the time calls for it.

I'm sorry, but I see no grey area here. I can't imagine any school having "loopholes" to allow this sort of incident, and even if these did exist, to take advantage of them is highly unethical. My first thought jumps to Marc Hauser and I assure you he started his ethical impropriety off small. You are standing on a very slippery slope.

I understand your concerns and fears because of age and responsibilities, but it sounds like in order for you to be happy you will need a very specific job. I'm not saying it would be impossible to achieve said job, but that does make your future quite a bit stressful. Let's try to address your questions one by one. 1) You want a subfield in which you will "only" work 35 years. I won't get my pHd until I am 35 and I hope to God I am still observing monkeys when I am 85 years old. If I can't go out in the field, then, hopefully, i can mentor others that will. If I am "forced" to retire then there is always traveling and book writing. 2) I'm not sure there is necessarily a "sub field" in which your perfect situation lies (relating to all questions). You make of your degree what you want. If you prefer couch anthropology then by all means go for it! Study up in bio-arch, perhaps specialize in genetics and simply run data in a lab. Occasionally head to field sites to collect bones or survey bones, be a consultant, etc. Really - the limits of your career depends on your imagination and skill (and of course luck, we all need luck). 3) I wish I had more information about this, but your best bet is to start looking at Us.gov surveys of job prospects, which grad degrees get hired, etc. You might also start looking around on some Anthro job list serves. See what heading most of the jobs end up under. I can tell you not to pick primatology, we are already saturated. 4) Hmm.. I guess I mentioned bio arch in question 2, but I really don't think you should limit yourself just because you don't have a degree in genetics or biology. In fact for most of your interests you can use that excuse "Oh, but I don't have a degree in economics!" etc... Why not spend part of the summer at a bio arch field school? There are many that run from 2 weeks to 2 months. You can tailor your last year of classes around what you studied in the summer and try to expand on an idea. You have MORE than enough time to make something of this Masters. And you are you definitely done after your MA? You can continue on to a PhD program (possibly elsewhere in the same city?). If you rock out your last year and a half (yeah - i said "rock out", I don't care how "old" you are), then you will more than likely get admitted. As for your PS - as someone mentioned earlier, it is never too late to begin chatting up faculty. They will probably love that you are taking a stronger interest in Anthro. It's a funny thing, but usually profs want us to succeed. I think it makes them look good or something.... So maybe I didn't tell you what you wanted to hear, but I think it is what you need to hear. Good Luck! =)

I have two friends who are doing this right now, one situation has ended very badly and the next will more than likely end badly (going by what she has said). It always depends on the couple of course, but distance puts a serious strain on relationships. In the first they had been together for years before he moved to grad school, in the second they had only been together for a month but had been friends for a year.

How has no one mentioned alcohol yet? Get a beer making kit and buy wine by the dozen - you will save bundles of $$. AND don't forget to get some "fast recipe" books too. You really do save money (and eat better) when you cook at home. I also agree with investing in all-in-one LASER printer. Toner costs about $40, but lasts me almost a year. Coffee supplies are a must, of course, and everyone else has made some great suggestions. Just remember that although you may like being digital, having analog copies can be very helpful. I personally like having digital copies of articles for record keeping and paper copies for notating that I organize in 3" binders. I have a color coded highlighting system that really helps me get through a stack of them in a relatively short period of time. I know I *can* highlight on Adobe Pro, but it just is not as fast and for me, and not as memorable as when it is in my hands.

I had known all my recommenders for at least 4 years, because of this I sent them short, hand written thank you cards. =)

I only have one shot to get this and now that the time for decisions is nearly upon us my stomach is in knots.

See - it's convoluted right? And my issue was just 1 of the hundreds of different errors reported to students this semester. Regardless, my question was answered; not many schools have problems with financial aid. Hopefully NY gets its head out of its rear end and fixes these issues (and it is the NY SUNY system as a whole). 70% of the problems come from a new software that they are using to control financial aid/funding/loan (ie all money) generation/disbursements and the other 30% comes from poor management of financial aid staff.

OOPS! I should mention they were $35 EACH (sorry I was exhausted yesterday)- but still.. that's ridiculously cheap compared to anyone else I checked with. =) ALSO - you have the option of using fedex freight if your items are just too much to separate into a few tubs.

Check Fedex Ground - I once shipped 3 giant tubs (like the ones you have pictured) which weighed roughly 50 pounds each. They all cost $35 to get to CA from TX and were insured for $1000. They arrived safely - I NEVER have problems with fedex.

My undergrad advisors pounded one thing into my brain - you don't pick graduate school for the school, you pick it for the advisor . You have to have this person as your supervisor for the next 7 years. That's a long time to convince yourself to "make it". Not to mention, you should be as active meeting people and networking as you can be. Who is to say that you cannot go to said lower ranked school but keep the higher ranked profs as contacts? And finally, the program is crucial. Let's say you do need to change your study project or direction, it would be much easier to do this in a program where you enjoy many aspects, than one in which you enjoy few.

YES

Just a heads up, heard back from SUNY Buffalo (University at Buffalo) - accepted into the PhD Physical program (Primatology). Not too surprised, I'm doing well here as a Master's student. Some more info - if you are eligible for a presidential or other school fellowship (newly applying to UB) then you should have already gotten a letter/email. Everyone else will be put into the TA line pool and should hear pretty quickly. They tend to tell the "already attending" applicants after everyone else. Hope that helps =)

I'm not sure you understand the problem... These people spent the money already on bills and rent and such because they were told on Aug 14th that it was theirs. So they have to pay it back by May 5th or leave school. Few people have 5 grand sitting around to give back to the school. Regardless, my situation is getting fixed because I don't let this kind of stuff go. In my case their math was wrong, which would have cost me $2000. I am not alone - I have a list of people in my department that I am trying to help. I was curious if any other schools deal out these shenanigans. I am kind of surprised.. I guess NY Public has management issues that other places avoid.

You just do it. I was in a very high paying job and just took the plunge. I don't regret a thing and extra loans can help you get by if you need.

It actually has nothing to do with the graduate programs. This problem has to do with both how and when the school's financial aid department doles out money every semester, regardless of whether it is a fellowship, stipend, loan, etc AND determines how much money each student is allowed to have per year. Our department is fine.

That is already in the works Eigen and why we have been able to correct some problems. Just like your school, we will only see little changes each semester; the time it takes to correct these stupid problems is ludicrous. Also NY state just passed some pretty insane regulations that effect public universities, which give the school full control and power over anything funding related. Essentially they are allowed, by law, to do almost anything. We do have an organized union for TA's and GA's but there is no union for just graduate students. We also have an formal grad association and they help as much as they can. I was really just curious if other schools suffer this or if NY is some kind of "special case".

Our school is the WORST, especially since they started this new online "easy to use system". Every semester since Summer 2011 I spend fighting with the interim director of financial aid for our rights as graduate students. Thankfully a little grass roots movement has been able to make some changes to their ridiculous policies, but it seems like every semester something terrible happens to a large percentage of grad students. This semester it happens to be that the school miscalculated everyone's funding totals so that people who got extra loans are now having to pay back thousands of dollars within the next two months. I have been lumped into this category even though I totaled everything up and verified its validity before accepting. I have the money in my savings - that's not the point - the point is that they should not be allowed to do this!

I would not accept a student without an interview. In person is best, but phone would be acceptable. I have known some grad students who have not lived up to their *I did great on my GRE/I can write really well/I worked with Dr. XYZ" potential.

I'm with kalapocska on this. You definitely need a break, but you don't want to burn any bridges or be rash. Go for a leave of absence. I did it after my divorce and decided to come back in time for the next semester. (Although I did not have the experience that you are)

Congrats jmkyle! All this info is still relevant. I know that I wished I had someone to contact whenever I was in the process of relocating (I purchased a home), so if you have questions on down the line feel free to send me a PM. I happen to be in the Anthro department. =)

Wow - I would run for the hills were I you. I know my response is not as eloquent as those above, but I am a bit shocked. The preceding advice is all very sound; your situation has no happy ending. Something (if not several things) will suffer: your career, your heart, your peer's opinions, etc etc etc. Cancel the date. Switch advisors.

I should add an update. This semester all of my classes are cross listed and setup differently from my previous mixed grade classes. Undergrads and Grads all share the same class time but grads are given about 20% more coursework (and of course have higher expectations). Half the undergrads in my courses are impressive while I am left wondering how the other half were allowed to register...

How is your credit? This is the type of trip that, if I needed to, I would put on a credit card. As long as you only use CC's for emergencies (and this sounds like one) then you wil still be following good financial sense. Alternatively you could ask the school if anyone else is coming from the same location that you are - perhaps you can car pool?

The amount of relatives who mean well but have no concept of graduate school is immense. I had to finally sit my mother down and TRY to help her understand, all in an effort to keep her from offering odd pieces of advice". It took quite a bit of time to explain how everything works and I answered every question she could think of. My mother is a very smart person too. Even after this though she still likes to say things like "You want to work in a cortisol lab this summer?" (insert my explanation of what cortisol is) ---- her next statement "My neighbor has a daughter who studies genetics at XYZ university. you should talk to her.".................. *sigh*