Anyone else losing their damn mind?

[blasian]

I have applied to 8 programs and have been rejected by 7 of them. This last school had the latest deadline (February!) and I just want to know now so I can celebrate or get on with my life. I've had a really good talk with a good friend (who has his PhD) and I will strongly consider applying next year. All these rejections have put some doubt in my mind not of if I want to do it or if I am capable of doing it, but of whether I want to put my energies into re-strategizing and trying this again. A part of me says if I don't get in then bring it on for next cycle. But a part of me is still holding out on hope. I don't know if I'm being foolish but as a couple of folks have told me, "all it takes is one."

[karrotte]

i had a vivid dream about receiving an acceptance from my sort-of-first-sort-of-second-choice program the night before i got an email containing "I am please to inform you" from the department head. maybe it's just a long buildup to some good news for you, too..!

 

Thanks so much for the encouragement I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed!

[Reatha]

I have applied to 8 programs and have been rejected by 7 of them. This last school had the latest deadline (February!) and I just want to know now so I can celebrate or get on with my life. I've had a really good talk with a good friend (who has his PhD) and I will strongly consider applying next year. All these rejections have put some doubt in my mind not of if I want to do it or if I am capable of doing it, but of whether I want to put my energies into re-strategizing and trying this again. A part of me says if I don't get in then bring it on for next cycle. But a part of me is still holding out on hope. I don't know if I'm being foolish but as a couple of folks have told me, "all it takes is one."

 

I've been rejected from 6 schools and I'm still waiting on 3. I"m trying to stay positive about the remaining ones but I interviewed with one four weeks ago and believe if it was good news I would have heard something by now. 

 

I keep telling myself it only takes one as well and will reapply next year if that's what it takes. Good luck with your last one!!!

[MSW13]

As someone who was rejected from all 3 schools I applied to last year, I strongly encourage you not to give up.  If the worst happens and you are rejected from that last school, the first thing you should do is start making calls and find out what went wrong. Take that information and work on it--and try again next year. Believe me, the time goes by very quickly and if you spend your time well, you will be in a much better position this time next year.

 

Good luck and yes, it truly just takes one!

 

I have applied to 8 programs and have been rejected by 7 of them. This last school had the latest deadline (February!) and I just want to know now so I can celebrate or get on with my life. I've had a really good talk with a good friend (who has his PhD) and I will strongly consider applying next year. All these rejections have put some doubt in my mind not of if I want to do it or if I am capable of doing it, but of whether I want to put my energies into re-strategizing and trying this again. A part of me says if I don't get in then bring it on for next cycle. But a part of me is still holding out on hope. I don't know if I'm being foolish but as a couple of folks have told me, "all it takes is one."

[SLPjmar]

One of my schools is notifying tomorrow at 5 via e-mail. I am so anxious about it. 

[pears]

my fingers and toes are crossed for you, jmarti!

[sweetpearl16]

I have lost my mind during this whole process. I applied to five schools and was accepted by two and waitlisted by my top choice. This entire application process has been stressful and painful. It has also been extremely miserable and awkward for reasons I can't fully go into but have to do with applying and being rejected (due to stupid departmental politics) by the program at which I am currently completely my MA. I can't talk to any of my classmates about what happened. More than that, as admissions decisions have come out, I have realized that trying to apply to grad schools and complete coursework was not the best idea. I think the two grad schools into which I've been accepted are not right for me, no matter how much I've tried to convince myself of otherwise. More than that, due to everything that has happened, I have become depressed and lost my drive to continue on with my studies. I think if I don't get into my waitlist school, I really need to take a year off to figure out what I want to do with my life, what I want to study, and which programs really match my interests. 

[tarrman]

@sweetpearl16 I can definitely sympathize with the stress of completing coursework and applying to schools. My drive to continue working has been completely shot. For some reason, I decided to take 3 grad courses (a full graduate semester) in addition to 3 undergrad courses, and I was completely overwhelmed a month in to school. From October to December I was working 7 days a week for 80+ hours. This all culminated in 6 finals (the week all my apps were due as well). I often fear that by the time grad school starts, I will be too burnt out to care.

 

I think a year off would do wonders for anybody who has lost their drive (including me, but it's not gonna happen).

[pears]

sweetpearl: nothing wrong with a year off! i don't know if you took time off before beginning your MA, but i'm going on to month 10 of job-hopping, and i don't regret a second of it. i've learned a lot more about myself: where my real interests and priorities lie (everything from research and "dream careers" to where i want to live), my strenghts and weaknesses, my limitations.. the list goes on, but you get the idea. i think i would've been unhappy and really stressed if i'd tried to go right into my first round of grad school while i was still a student, if only because my interests have crystallized more and i've matured in ways that only work experience could make happen. your heart and your gut tend to guide you in the right direction— no need to rush.

[sweetpearl16]

sweetpearl: nothing wrong with a year off! i don't know if you took time off before beginning your MA, but i'm going on to month 10 of job-hopping, and i don't regret a second of it. i've learned a lot more about myself: where my real interests and priorities lie (everything from research and "dream careers" to where i want to live), my strenghts and weaknesses, my limitations.. the list goes on, but you get the idea. i think i would've been unhappy and really stressed if i'd tried to go right into my first round of grad school while i was still a student, if only because my interests have crystallized more and i've matured in ways that only work experience could make happen. your heart and your gut tend to guide you in the right direction— no need to rush.

 

Thanks so much pears! I actually went straight from undergrad to grad school. I wanted to take time off, but I let my dad talk me into getting an MA. It is kind of scary giving up two acceptances, even if I know they are not right for me. But after all the stress I have experienced this past year, I think a year off might let me research grad schools the right way and renew my desire to actually get a PhD. Or I might discover after all the academic politics I've had the pleasure of experiencing first hand, that maybe academia is not for me.

[Reatha]

Thanks so much pears! I actually went straight from undergrad to grad school. I wanted to take time off, but I let my dad talk me into getting an MA. It is kind of scary giving up two acceptances, even if I know they are not right for me. But after all the stress I have experienced this past year, I think a year off might let me research grad schools the right way and renew my desire to actually get a PhD. Or I might discover after all the academic politics I've had the pleasure of experiencing first hand, that maybe academia is not for me.

 

I feel this is something you need to hear, even though its not something I like spreading. 

 

I have been told for a long time that I should go on to be a doctor, and in light of this I applied to medical school during my senior year. After interviewing I came to a realization, that it would be a relief if I did not get into medical school. It was at this point that I realized this is what everyone wanted for me, but not what I wanted for me. When the offer came a few months later, I couldn't accept it. My dad kind of understood, my mom thought I was crazy and was practically hysterical. 

 

In the mean time I had decided that i wanted to go for my PhD. The summer after I had a research internship, but when it ran out in August I found that I was unemployed  I moved back in with my parents and ended up in a sort of limbo while my friends moved on with their lives. I went from future med student to unemployed engineer just like that. During this time I applied to grad school, and eventually found a job 4 months later. I received a full time job offer with promotional potential and an internship at the same time. Since I knew that I wanted to go to grad school I turned down the job offer and took the internship.

 

Right now, it doesn't look like I will be accepted to grad school (I've been rejected from 6 programs and are waiting on 3). I've turned down so many opportunities for this, but even so I believe I made the right decision. I know this is what I want and hope to reapply next year, if what I expect to happen comes to happen.

 

With that I conclude, if its not right, then its not right. I don't regret turning down the offers I had because that would have been a decision I would have regretted. Make the decision that's right for you, and it won't always be the easy one. 

[phigirl]

I don't know if I'm being foolish but as a couple of folks have told me, "all it takes is one."

 

that's what my one prof told me. I too am down to 1 last program to hear from, so I'm sincerely hoping. It's been 2 years since I graduated from UG and so I've recently came up with a backup plan but here's to hoping it works out for us both

[supplicant]

I just wanted to keep my head down and finish my MA. Now that I sent all my applications in, there's nothing more I can do about it, so I wanted to just finish my work and wait to see how things turned out. Then I started checking GradCafe, which I expressly did not want to do. Then I got my first response last Friday and it was a rejection. I had some fun Saturday to keep my mind off things and finished some grading on Sunday. I'd like to get back into my thesis, but this is driving me insane. Based on the rumour going around here, it looks like the admission committees for my top two choices have met, so I'm desperately hoping that I got in somewhere and that my application is just waiting on funding or the Dean of Graduate studies. I could probably just walk down the hall and ask the grad administrator how the application process is going, but I'm afraid I'll lose it if they don't have any good news for me.

[DarlingNikki]

I have applied to 8 programs and have been rejected by 7 of them. This last school had the latest deadline (February!) and I just want to know now so I can celebrate or get on with my life. I've had a really good talk with a good friend (who has his PhD) and I will strongly consider applying next year. All these rejections have put some doubt in my mind not of if I want to do it or if I am capable of doing it, but of whether I want to put my energies into re-strategizing and trying this again. A part of me says if I don't get in then bring it on for next cycle. But a part of me is still holding out on hope. I don't know if I'm being foolish but as a couple of folks have told me, "all it takes is one."

 

My situation echoes yours. Similarly, I've been rejected by all but one school (technically two) and while I'm eager to hear from the last school I'm ready to move on and figure out what my next steps should be. I have, however, taken the time to reach out to schools from which I've received rejections and requested feedback about my application and things that I could do different next year. I know this is something that I want, so it really doesn't do me any justice to lounge around reveling in my own self pity. I encourage you to do the same thing. Come up with a game plan (just in case). Hope for the best, plan for the worst. If this is really what you want....Stay the path! It'll be worth it.

[nope]

Now I really am losing my mind. Top of the wait list at my number one choice, and I'm my POI's favorite. But he doesn't get priority in picking students this year. So basically I have to hope and pray and dream and whatever that someone above me says no. Ugh.

[ironetteang]

I am losing it waiting on replies from the schools I applied to. I recently received an email from Baruch to go in for a group interview, which is good news, but I have this anxious feeling that I'll do something wrong (I tend to be somewhat awkward in interviews...) and I haven't heard a word from City College or Brooklyn. So nerve racking.

Edited March 11, 2013 by ironetteang

[klingram]

Applied to three schools but at this point I am fairly sure I am not getting into any of the programs because I was not contacted for interviews. I just wish they would send the rejection letters so I can start inquiring about how I can improve my application for next year. It is just so frustrating. I passed on a job offer hoping I would get in and now I have to scramble to find something for the fall. 

[blasian]

reatha and phigirl: good luck to you both! it DOES only take one... but i decided that i do want to reapply next year if this year doesn't work out.

 

darlingnikki and msw13: good advice about calling schools to see what went wrong. i feel like i'm re-energizing for all of this now! thanks!!

[somerset]

Asking schools for feedback can be tough....I am an international student and got rejected last year from 5 sociology PhD programs....I emailed every one of them-the DGS to ask them what I could do to improve my chances-only one person responded talking about the challenges in funding for international students and my non sociology background. My friends who have had success in feedback are those that were able to visit the school individually and get oral feedback face to face. I thought I would share my experience- of course yours might be completely different!

BTW I applied this year and have 1 fully funded acceptance and 1 wait list-so things do turn around if you dont give up!

[ZacharyObama]

Intoxicants calm the voices in my head, also they like cookies and fried chicken.

[SLPjmar]

I have accepted that I will need to reapply next year. Look out, guys! I'll be here a long time. 

[Goobah]

Jmarti, if it makes you feel any better, some of the best Grad school success stories I've heard are from ppl that were rejected the first time around. In fact my friend keeps telling me to just buck up and apply to the same school again the next year, because that's how she got in. Sometimes this stuff is such a crapshoot... Ugh.

[phigirl]

well at least I can have my mind back-got my final rejection this morning so there's no more wondering anymore.

[Biohopeful]

No response anywhere so far...  I'm beginning to think the schools may have lost my email address/phone number.

 

Looks like I may be joining you guys next application season.

[sansao]

I guess I'm having a moment today. Overwhelming feelings of insufficiency and what-the-hell-am-I-doing-ness. No more decisions yet, either. Sigh. This needs to be over soon. Also it's too early in the damned morning to be introspective.