Older students?

[lizardclan]

When I was a 30something, I returned to college for a second BA.

 

Now I'm a 40something, and returning to get a PhD.

 

I met with Professors in my department, and we talked about being an older student.  They told stories of many successful 40somethings, and just one bad story.

Edited February 2, 2015 by lizardclan

[Scantronphobia]

When I was a 30something, I returned to college for a second BA.

 

Now I'm a 40something, and returning to get a PhD.

 

I met with Professors in my department, and we talked about being an older student.  They told stories of many successful 40somethings, and just one bad story.

'

Hi--I'm interested to know what the profs said about getting a doctorate at that age?

[avflinsch]

When I was a 30something, I returned to college for a second BA.

 

Now I'm a 40something, and returning to get a PhD.

 

I met with Professors in my department, and we talked about being an older student.  They told stories of many successful 40somethings, and just one bad story.

 

When I was at the commencement ceremony for my undergrad, there were 6 or 7 phds awarded, about half went to folks over 40, one guy looked about 60. It may not be as uncommon as you think, but it very well may be field dependent.

[GeoMex]

Does anyone have any tips for studying stuff you forgot from your undergrad after being out so many years? 

I realized there's some things I've forgotten or don't remember well and need to review them and re-learn/remember them.

Anyone have any tips for this? (besides the obvious reading and reading)

Edited February 4, 2015 by GeoMex

[avflinsch]

The simplest answer is usually the best - reread the material.

 

I found it better to do it in short bursts, rather than trying to cram everything back in at once. I think the act of rereading triggered some sort of deep retrieval mechanism in the brain and exercised bits that hadn't been used in a while.

 

Most of it came back fairly quickly, what didn't, I probably never really understood anyway. 

[GeoMex]

The simplest answer is usually the best - reread the material.

 

I found it better to do it in short bursts, rather than trying to cram everything back in at once. I think the act of rereading triggered some sort of deep retrieval mechanism in the brain and exercised bits that hadn't been used in a while.

 

Most of it came back fairly quickly, what didn't, I probably never really understood anyway. 

 

Yeah, that's what I'm doing now, I guess there's nothing more to it but just read it.

Thank you

[jujubea]

Hi there -

 

I'm almost 30 and have a fiance and three stepchildren, two of whom are moving with us to wherever we end up. Any other stepparents on this thread? Brings a whole new dimension to the challenge... They're 13 and 11, and wonderful kids, but still not used to me as their primary female caregiver (they see their out-of-state mom for one weekend every other month, at best). 

 

Being the stepparent and the cause for the impending family move is making for tense family life. I was already the least favorite parent, now I fear it's going to get worse. (I'm not an evil stepmom though! I cook and clean and help with their homework and shuttle them to and fro, take care of them when they're sick, etc., etc. all without batting an eye, at least not at them...)

 

I have a supportive fiance, but we're really worried about making ends meet wherever we go, because everywhere is more expensive than a border town.

 

At least we have the solace of knowing wherever we go will have better schools and better environment and better people for the kids. 

[Henry Hudson]

Does anyone have any tips for studying stuff you forgot from your undergrad after being out so many years? 

I realized there's some things I've forgotten or don't remember well and need to review them and re-learn/remember them.

Anyone have any tips for this? (besides the obvious reading and reading)

 

I will actually seek out reviews or summaries of a work (ideally several of them) to give me an idea as to what to look for that other academics got out of it, and look for ways to meaningfully agree or disagree with those. i find it easier to filter assigned readings by placing it in the academic discourse, and i like to dive into them knowing what the gist of that discourse is. 

[lore]

I just wanted to say that this is a really cool thread. I'm a 30something and have been wondering if it'll be awkward to one day be in a PhD program with mostly younger students. It's interesting reading about all the challenges and positives some of you are experiencing.

I think it depends what you study too. I found that my Education classes in undergrad had a higher average age. As someone who did 18-21 for my BA, I was always the youngest and had a harder time contributing when conversations involving life experience came up.

On the flip side, I learned a lot from my classmates and valued the experience. Though it may be strange to be with younger students, take it as an opportunity to share and see different perspectives.

[Scantronphobia]

Looks like everyone has been busy with no new posts in a while, but I'd like to check back in and see how it's all going for everyone on this thread. I'm getting more comfortable with being an older member of the graduate student body, although I still am not comfortable telling my age (and I'm not sure that would even be wise since it might only serve as a distraction for people who try to "figure" people out).  Here's what the problem might be: I am starting to feel younger. I'm enjoying myself, and I don't have any children, so I can pretty much keep up the same lifestyle--'cept for the digestion. Is this a problem? I've come to the conclusion that maybe I'm just immature, and that's why it took me so long to get here, and now that I'm here, I don't feel all that much older than most people, even though the difference is generally 12+ years....

[Chai_latte]

I did not feel older in my last program.  Most of the students were doctoral candidates.  So, there was a range of ages.  There were also the post-docs.  (I was the same age as most 4th-5th year PhD students.)  In this program, however, I am aware of the age difference.  I live on campus, and my suitemates are all in their early 20's.  A few of them definitely seem younger.   It almost feels like college...part 2 (which is a nice change of pace).  I'm probably one of the oldest people in the whole building.  

On the other hand,  I think most of my classmates fall into the 24-34 bracket.  So, I only feel older before and after class, not during.

[phdthoughts]

Chai_latte & Scantronphobia - so glad to hear you're all thriving in your program. I'm considering going back to get my PhD after working for a while at 35 and it's nice to hear it's not that huge of a deal. It's a huge consideration for me, even though I know it's just one thing admissions committees look at.

[Chai_latte]

Chai_latte & Scantronphobia - so glad to hear you're all thriving in your program. I'm considering going back to get my PhD after working for a while at 35 and it's nice to hear it's not that huge of a deal. It's a huge consideration for me, even though I know it's just one thing admissions committees look at.

It really isn't.  We're all here to learn and to enhance our careers.  Now, with that said, I didn't announce that I was 30 to my suitemates lol.  Being this age with suitemates was never part of the grand plan (at least I'm saving money during these 2 semesters!), but I digress...  

As far as admissions go, I bet you're not the only one in communications who has taken some time off.  One of the people in my cohort has returned to school for his M.S.; he's 34-35.  One classmate who entered last year is about 40.  I don't think this is particularly uncommon in the social sciences.  Go for it!        

Edited September 8, 2015 by Chai_latte

[justanotherlostgrrl]

Looks like everyone has been busy with no new posts in a while, but I'd like to check back in and see how it's all going for everyone on this thread. I'm getting more comfortable with being an older member of the graduate student body, although I still am not comfortable telling my age (and I'm not sure that would even be wise since it might only serve as a distraction for people who try to "figure" people out).  Here's what the problem might be: I am starting to feel younger. I'm enjoying myself, and I don't have any children, so I can pretty much keep up the same lifestyle--'cept for the digestion. Is this a problem? I've come to the conclusion that maybe I'm just immature, and that's why it took me so long to get here, and now that I'm here, I don't feel all that much older than most people, even though the difference is generally 12+ years....

Oh, the digestion! I remember being able to have gluten and milk once upon a time

Glad your experience is going well.  I would say my experience is mixed - I do know some people in my program who haven't worked, and I bring a lot of different work experiences that I do talk about in class (tied to the program material) and I don't know if people just can't relate or not.   There are moments of 'let's all go drinking' that I can't relate to at all, or going to event after event.  I come home exhausted and sleep - I'm feeling like my 40s are making this harder than I would realize.  I'm trying, but I feel like an outsider, and don't think it ever will be easy for me in the program because I feel very different than everyone.  I bring a certain kind of more philosophical point of view, but sense that's looked down on.  I'm trying to remain open minded and positive where I can be, but it's tricky.  People will bring up blanket statements in class - 'Facebook is evil' - and my counter examples - 'ah, but they had a role in the Arab Spring, so while parts of their practices are unethical, there is some value in...' and I get blank stares, and end up not continuing.  Any nuance tends to be lost.

I do wish I could find the older students in other programs in my school, but I have no idea where I'd go to find them.  I try to go to events, but the workload is pretty hard to balance as well as look for some kind of work.

Edited October 3, 2015 by justanotherlostgrrl

[avflinsch]

 

I do wish I could find the older students in other programs in my school, but I have no idea where I'd go to find them.  I try to go to events, but the workload is pretty hard to balance as well as look for some kind of work.

Check with the undergrad departments - they usually have some sort of formalized 'non traditional student' group, and can possibly point you towards a similar informal grad student group.

 

[Scantronphobia]

Oh, the digestion! I remember being able to have gluten and milk once upon a time

Glad your experience is going well.  I would say my experience is mixed - I do know some people in my program who haven't worked, and I bring a lot of different work experiences that I do talk about in class (tied to the program material) and I don't know if people just can't relate or not.   There are moments of 'let's all go drinking' that I can't relate to at all, or going to event after event.  I come home exhausted and sleep - I'm feeling like my 40s are making this harder than I would realize.  I'm trying, but I feel like an outsider, and don't think it ever will be easy for me in the program because I feel very different than everyone.  I bring a certain kind of more philosophical point of view, but sense that's looked down on.  I'm trying to remain open minded and positive where I can be, but it's tricky.  People will bring up blanket statements in class - 'Facebook is evil' - and my counter examples - 'ah, but they had a role in the Arab Spring, so while parts of their practices are unethical, there is some value in...' and I get blank stares, and end up not continuing.  Any nuance tends to be lost.

I do wish I could find the older students in other programs in my school, but I have no idea where I'd go to find them.  I try to go to events, but the workload is pretty hard to balance as well as look for some kind of work.

Hmm--this is interesting--so these students are not interested in parsing nuance? In a grad program? I'm not sure that's related to age. I feel like that is a key activity in grad school--although there are days when I've had enough of thinking and just want to watch a stupid movie. All to say, don't take it personally. Even if it is an age difference thing, I like to think that the extra years I've spent on Earth have at least brought a sense of authority and understanding to my perspective that younger people don't yet have. Embrace it--they'll look to you as a leader and an inspiration, even if you aren't a regular in the bars.

[Scantronphobia]

Chai_latte & Scantronphobia - so glad to hear you're all thriving in your program. I'm considering going back to get my PhD after working for a while at 35 and it's nice to hear it's not that huge of a deal. It's a huge consideration for me, even though I know it's just one thing admissions committees look at.

Hi--good luck in your application process! Yeah--I wonder how much my age played a part in the admissions process. I don't know what admissions teams think about the stigmas, disadvantages, or advantages of an older applicant. And I also wonder how they feel now that I'm sitting in their classes, knowing that I may be close to--and maybe even a little older--than their ages. Anyway, I think the most important thing is to show that you've got an active intellectual curiosity and are open to new ideas and ways of doing things. What do others think??

[NavyMom]

Hey everyone! 

I am nearly halfway through my 3rd semester and all is well.     I got a new job starting in July and things have just taken off!  I am no longer in a support position (administrative assistant), but a Policy Analyst... which is exactly what I am studying in my masters degree.  Got one hell of a pay raise and good benefits.  Never imagined it would happen this early in the game. 

So far I haven't had any struggles with my professors or fellow students, although I am not going to be finishing with any "strong" or "close" friendships.  Most of the folks are a bit younger than I am, and well, they have formed their only little "click" that I am not included in... most likely because I am much older.

 

Anyways - hope everyone else is well. 

[phdthoughts]

Hey everyone! 

I am nearly halfway through my 3rd semester and all is well.     I got a new job starting in July and things have just taken off!  I am no longer in a support position (administrative assistant), but a Policy Analyst... which is exactly what I am studying in my masters degree.  Got one hell of a pay raise and good benefits.  Never imagined it would happen this early in the game. 

So far I haven't had any struggles with my professors or fellow students, although I am not going to be finishing with any "strong" or "close" friendships.  Most of the folks are a bit younger than I am, and well, they have formed their only little "click" that I am not included in... most likely because I am much older.

 

Anyways - hope everyone else is well. 

Wonderful to hear. So glad things are going well.

[justanotherlostgrrl]

Hmm--this is interesting--so these students are not interested in parsing nuance? In a grad program? I'm not sure that's related to age. I feel like that is a key activity in grad school--although there are days when I've had enough of thinking and just want to watch a stupid movie. All to say, don't take it personally. Even if it is an age difference thing, I like to think that the extra years I've spent on Earth have at least brought a sense of authority and understanding to my perspective that younger people don't yet have. Embrace it--they'll look to you as a leader and an inspiration, even if you aren't a regular in the bars.

To be fair, I have a required class where it's a bunch of grad students from different departments, and the ones who aren't into nuance are the more 'artsy' or 'code-y' grad students - so they're not used to thinking meta about the work.  Some of my classmates do parse the nuance - it's also difficult because some of our classes are pretty theoretical, so I suspect at some level we're all just exhausted from thinking.  I'm disappointed by some of the classes - one in particular whose workload is through the roof, and the professors are unable to communicate clearly what they want, or we all come out going, "what the....?"  The good news is some of the students have banded together and said they're frustrated, and we need more guidance. Solidarity in numbers  

I'm not sure anyone looks to anyone as leaders or inspiration here, and it's been hard to get back in the socializing part.  I'm also doing so much group work and by the end of the day, I'm just exhausted from so much human contact.  I feel pretty lost as an introvert and feel it's definitely pushed me out of my comfort zone, for better and for worse.

[Threeboysmom]

Hey everyone! 

I am nearly halfway through my 3rd semester and all is well.     I got a new job starting in July and things have just taken off!  I am no longer in a support position (administrative assistant), but a Policy Analyst... which is exactly what I am studying in my masters degree.  Got one hell of a pay raise and good benefits.  Never imagined it would happen this early in the game. 

So far I haven't had any struggles with my professors or fellow students, although I am not going to be finishing with any "strong" or "close" friendships.  Most of the folks are a bit younger than I am, and well, they have formed their only little "click" that I am not included in... most likely because I am much older.

 

Anyways - hope everyone else is well. 

Way to go this is great news!

[bhr]

I get feeling like you have weaker relationships than if you were in the same age range. I used to be really bothered by the fact that I didn't get including the in invites for stuff, but I realized I, often as not, would rather just sleep/catch up on work/not do it for those weeknight gatherings. After a year and a summer, I've identified a handful of folks who I enjoy spending time with and try to do coffee/lunch with one of them once a week, just to feel connected. I quit drinking at the start of the spring semester anyway, so I wouldn't be much fun as the wet blanket anyway.

That said, the new cohorts seem to have gravitated to me as some sort of mentor, which is a nice experience. I don't know if it's age, or just that I'm chatty, but they tend to come to me for help with the administrative part of being a grad student (funding forms, conference submissions, forming a committee), which feels good. It probably helps that I am clearly comfortable with my place in the program/field at the moment.

 

All that said, PhD applications are due in 46 days and I've got no idea if I want to re-up into my mid 40s or go find a nice CC teaching job.

[justanotherlostgrrl]

I'm frustrated.  I'm working in groups (and share a group mark) where the students are deciding to be a little too creative on our group assignments - the professor gives us a bullet point list of the things he's looking for, and instead the group decides to do something tangentially related to the topic that doesn't cover what the professor has asked in the written assignment.  The assignment is to display that we understand the material, but people are turning their work into a political statement (essentially) rather than follow the bullet points.   This has come up a few times in a few classes, and I don't know what to do about it.  I show up to meetings with ideas and either the louder folks win out, or the groups decide to do something too creative than what the professor has asked.  I raise my concerns with the group, but am cautious about sharing them, as I inevitably will be working with people again and don't want to get a reputation.  There is no option for me to work on my own on this.

I want to meet with the professor to show him my work (i.e. showing that I follow directions) but don't know what the repercussions would be with speaking with him are.  I don't want my grades to be affected, and I know he'll inevitably say something like 'it's up to you to work it out with them'.  I'm just worried that I'll put effort in and it won't get recognized because people are turning the assignment into something it's not, and my grades will suffer. Is something that comes from a Millennial mindset - to decide to do something different than what's being asked? Because I'm getting more and more frustrated the more I encounter it.

[acmes]

Morning all, here's something to make you feel better about yourself:  If you think YOU'RE old, try being me: 57.  I've spent the last couple of years in a program for returning students who want to get a do-over, prior to applying to Grad school.  The good news is my transcript looks much better than it did when I walked in the door and I have close to 30 credits that justify the change of focus (BA in Poli. Sci. and hope to have an MA in Archaeology/Art History).  Now for the hard part...asking for LOR.  It fills me with dread.  I keep "imagining" that all the "A"s I piled up were given to me because the professor felt sorry for me.  Plus, most of them seem to be on sabbatical this year.  Does anyone have any tips or words of wisdom? 

The other hard part:  There are very few local programs for what I'd like to study (and I can't relocate because I still have a child in high school).  Looking at CUNY MA in Liberal Studies, because they don't require the GREs  (the gods have smiled upon me). 

[avflinsch]

Morning all, here's something to make you feel better about yourself:  If you think YOU'RE old, try being me: 57.  I've spent the last couple of years in a program for returning students who want to get a do-over, prior to applying to Grad school.  The good news is my transcript looks much better than it did when I walked in the door and I have close to 30 credits that justify the change of focus (BA in Poli. Sci. and hope to have an MA in Archaeology/Art History).  Now for the hard part...asking for LOR.  It fills me with dread.  I keep "imagining" that all the "A"s I piled up were given to me because the professor felt sorry for me.  Plus, most of them seem to be on sabbatical this year.  Does anyone have any tips or words of wisdom? 

The other hard part:  There are very few local programs for what I'd like to study (and I can't relocate because I still have a child in high school).  Looking at CUNY MA in Liberal Studies, because they don't require the GREs  (the gods have smiled upon me). 

 

Finally - someone older than me  (but not by much)

Don't worry, and just ask for the LORs, you got the As because you deserved them, not out of any sense of pity. 

The worst that can happen is that you need to wait for a while before the prof gets back to you, and who knows, you might end up taking classes at the same time as your HS child - happening to me right now. Fortunately my daughter is in a totally different program (same University though).