Venting Thread- Vent about anything.

[Cheshire_Cat]

I've never wanted to quit something so badly in my life.  I can't do it, okay?! I'm ADHD and bored to death with with project and it's too complicated for me to be bored to death with it.  And all I want to do is hide away until I go back to school.  And they don't understand how bad morale is.  At least my morale, and the morale of one of my co-workers.  We don't have enough instruction to do it right.  I love my senior manager and my office, but I hate working with this other office.  I think it is impossible.  The person who is supposed to be helping is too busy, and 1,000 miles away.  But he doesn't understand that if we don't get it right the first time, that creates more work for him in the long run.  And if something isn't done, I don't want to come to work in the morning, which means I'm more likely to quit, which means more work for him and the others.  And I just don't want to do it. Plain and simple.  I'd rather be a Starbucks Barista.  Think someone with a CPA would be considered "overqualified" for a job at Starbucks?  I suppose I don't have to put that on my resume...

[scarvesandcardigans]

I really wish I could ask the programs I was rejected from why I was rejected.  Not in a whiny, egotistical way - but I genuinely want to know where I went wrong so that I can try to improve.  I submitted between 10-20 poems to each program.  Which was their favorite, least favorite?  Would it be consistent among people I asked?  Do I have one that just TANKS with everyone that I'm not aware of?  Do you hate sonnets? Tetrameter? Chiastic structure?  ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

 

I have actually heard of people doing this and making it known that they want to improve their applications or know what to work on. It's probably rare but not totally impossible. 

[MidwesternAloha]

I've never wanted to quit something so badly in my life.  I can't do it, okay?! I'm ADHD and bored to death with with project and it's too complicated for me to be bored to death with it.  And all I want to do is hide away until I go back to school.  And they don't understand how bad morale is.  At least my morale, and the morale of one of my co-workers.  We don't have enough instruction to do it right.  I love my senior manager and my office, but I hate working with this other office.  I think it is impossible.  The person who is supposed to be helping is too busy, and 1,000 miles away.  But he doesn't understand that if we don't get it right the first time, that creates more work for him in the long run.  And if something isn't done, I don't want to come to work in the morning, which means I'm more likely to quit, which means more work for him and the others.  And I just don't want to do it. Plain and simple.  I'd rather be a Starbucks Barista.  Think someone with a CPA would be considered "overqualified" for a job at Starbucks?  I suppose I don't have to put that on my resume...

Just don't put your degree on the job application. I much prefer serving(coffee or waitressing) to working my current job.

[ERR_Alpha]

I've never wanted to quit something so badly in my life. I can't do it, okay?! I'm ADHD and bored to death with with project and it's too complicated for me to be bored to death with it. And all I want to do is hide away until I go back to school. And they don't understand how bad morale is. At least my morale, and the morale of one of my co-workers. We don't have enough instruction to do it right. I love my senior manager and my office, but I hate working with this other office. I think it is impossible. The person who is supposed to be helping is too busy, and 1,000 miles away. But he doesn't understand that if we don't get it right the first time, that creates more work for him in the long run. And if something isn't done, I don't want to come to work in the morning, which means I'm more likely to quit, which means more work for him and the others. And I just don't want to do it. Plain and simple. I'd rather be a Starbucks Barista. Think someone with a CPA would be considered "overqualified" for a job at Starbucks? I suppose I don't have to put that on my resume...

Not to be stereotypical but you only live once. I would love to work at Starbucks. Quit your job if it makes you that unhappy. It's not worth it.

[Cheshire_Cat]

If I thought I would be doing this forever, I would quit in a heartbeat.  But I just have to survive three more months and then everything should calm down.  The last three months at my job should be better.  In June I'll take a long vacation and use up some sick leave.  Maybe ask my grandfather if I can visit him for a week or two.   The way I look at it, every 2 weeks I get paid is over enough money to cover fees for a semester, so I should probably stay there as long as I can.  My performance reviews don't really matter because I'll be in school in six months so I shouldn't worry as much about doing it wrong and getting review notes back.  And it will teach me patience for reviewers, which is something I will really need in academia.  It just hurts my pride to get multiple rounds of reviews, even if it is the reviewers fault.  And part of it is the pressure I put on myself.  I want to be good, better than everyone else.  I want to get everything done and be able to take on additional work because I see our office struggling to get everything done and I want to save the day.  But I can't, because I hate the project and just literally can't make myself do more than is neccesary to squeze by.  I don't want to leave my office in a lurch.  They have been good to me and are good people. It's not their fault the other office is crazy.  I just have to walk the fine line of wanting to say exactly what I think because I know I won't be here in six months, and not saying too much and getting fired. 

[uselesstheory]

really cruel, heartless, somewhat sociopathic individuals who have been able to climb the ladder(s) of academia popping up everywhere in my life that remind me of all the reasons i should run as fast as i can from an academic career

 

that is what i need to vent about. i get excited about a program but then have to realize that academia is not just this static 'thing', but in its very nature, an interconnected, tangled web of individual and departmental networks that invariably leave me connected to the very people i was so excited to flee...

 

so we have to 'play the game' forever? and by that, i mean tolerate people, watch your back, 'publish or perish' etc.?

i know this is the reality of academia, and that there are always concessions one must make, but it would be nice to be able to walk away from certain people (or even types of people or specific departments) as i go forth into this thing called 'my future'

[Amayan]

I'm not sure how to categorize this, but when people say things like:

 

"I had two jobs full time while being a single parent and going to grad school.  It's easy if you know how to work hard."

 

"I only get 4 hours of sleep a night.  It's no problem if you're ambitious."

 

"I lost all my pregnancy weight in two weeks.  Anyone can do it if they don't make excuses."

 

I'm not a very competitive person, but it irks me when people try to compete over silly things like who's period hurts the least.

[ERR_Alpha]

I'm not sure how to categorize this, but when people say things like:

"I had two jobs full time while being a single parent and going to grad school. It's easy if you know how to work hard."

"I only get 4 hours of sleep a night. It's no problem if you're ambitious."

"I lost all my pregnancy weight in two weeks. Anyone can do it if they don't make excuses."

I'm not a very competitive person, but it irks me when people try to compete over silly things like who's period hurts the least.

I hate this mentality so much. It's so unhealthy. I have a friend in my cohort who no matter how bad things are for you, things are always worse for her. I hate it. We all vent about stupid shit sometimes, it's not a contest. Also being so busy that you don't eat isn't cool either... I don't get why "I didn't even have time for lunch today!" Is a badge of honor. No wonder academics drive themselves absolutely insane...

[shadowclaw]

I hate this mentality so much. It's so unhealthy. I have a friend in my cohort who no matter how bad things are for you, things are always worse for her. I hate it. We all vent about stupid shit sometimes, it's not a contest. Also being so busy that you don't eat isn't cool either... I don't get why "I didn't even have time for lunch today!" Is a badge of honor. No wonder academics drive themselves absolutely insane...

I have a friend in my department who is doing some neuroscience work for her masters, and she takes a lot of images of brain slices. So she has all these images to analyze, and naturally it takes a while. Pretty much every week she tells me about how she spends x amount of hours in the lab and has all of this work and can barely find time to eat, sleep, or have fun. She then finishes with something along the lines of "you're so lucky you didn't have to collect this much data and that your analysis is so easy."

Sometimes I just want to go on a huge rant about how I got up at 4 am everyday over the summer, walked a few miles to collect my bird data, then went to work from 11 to 7 five days a week (and often got called in on my days off), went home, ate dinner, and then went to bed. I put in my time to collect my data and suffered just the same, I just did it in the summer.

[raneck]

The next time my co-advisor leaves a meeting early because his parking meter is expired I might just stab him with a screwdriver.

[.letmeinplz//]

The next time my co-advisor leaves a meeting early because his parking meter is expired I might just stab him with a screwdriver.

Why doesn't an employee of the university have a spot?

[MidwesternAloha]

Why doesn't an employee of the university have a spot?

Sometimes it's cheaper to utilize meters and free parking if you don't frequent the parts of campus that require a permit. Either that or the employee is just cheap. My university charges $1,000 a year OF YOUR TAXED SALARY for a spot in a lot a half mile away.

[Mastershaakti]

It's been 2 years and 20 applications. Two waitlists are all that stand between me and being shut out completely. If I hear one more person tell me "Don't worry, you'll make it off the wait list." I think I'm just going to kick them in the shin... or the balls. I'm trying to get a research assistant or lab manager position, but if that doesn't work out, there's basically no reason for me to reapply for year #3.

 

I really loved one of the programs. After I visited, I felt it was a perfect fit. My POI even had a similar background to me, and then I got waitlisted. I'm just so depressed and frustrated.

 

I understand your frustration and depression. I recently went on three back-to-back on-site interviews (12 flights in seven days) on opposite ends of the country with only partial travel expenses funded to be waitlisted to all three places (notified while still traveling en route to home). I got stuck in the northeast for two days because of snow, and I missed a tons of work back home that I now am desperately trying to catch-up on. To me, it feels like a big waste of time, money, and effort. At this point, winning the lottery has better odds than trying to get into a decent PhD program in social psychology with minimal funding. I feel like professors should warn us from the beginning (like intro to psych) that this career field is a joke, and only if you go to a top 50 undergrad program with a 4.0 GPA, 80th+ percentile GRE, and at least 1 first author publication with 10 poster/co-author pubs will actually get into the decent programs. The competitiveness is ridiculous. With my degree and prior research experience, I'm qualified to start working in marketing to start at $65K (i've been hired in the corporate industry but declined to "follow my passion" which has gotten me practically nowhere except for more debt). But since I've invested so much into this, I feel like I can't quit even though this field obviously doesn't want me. I remember switching from premed to psych primarily because it was more interesting but also I thought it would be easier. Oh, how I was wrong. My premed (now 2nd year med students) friends think I'm nuts to pick such a competitive field that pays so little for all the work and competition necessary. Are we all just complete sadomasochists or is there light at the end of the tunnel? End of rant. 

Edited March 3, 2015 by Mastershaakti

[mockturtle]

I've heard back from 2 out of 8 summer REUs: one rejection, and as of today, one "We'll be a few weeks late with decisions. Snow, am I right?"

If y'all aren't literally suspended in a glacier...

[Stonybrook4tw!]

 

If y'all aren't literally suspended in a glacier...

 

 

Hahaha this one got me. 

[raneck]

Why doesn't an employee of the university have a spot?

He only has an adjunct advising appointment at the campus we do most of our work at.  He and I are actually employed by a neighboring university (literally just down the street), and he has a parking spot there.  But instead of parking in his spot and walking the few blocks to the building, he parks at the meters right next to the building and leaves at 4 pm everyday.

[TheMercySeat]

The application process sucks. The application process sucks. The application process sucks. The application process sucks. The application process sucks. The application process sucks. 

 

I hate everything about it, from taking off of work to attend interviews, to the disgustingly competitive nature of it all (and superficiality, for that matter) and the pageantry of it, to academic pretensions ("Mmmm... yes. Who did you study under?") and meeting anxious 5th and 6th year students who are terrified of graduating, to being cognizant that the myself and the majority of these talented and hardworking interviewees will experience multiple rejections. 

[ERR_Alpha]

I've heard back from 2 out of 8 summer REUs: one rejection, and as of today, one "We'll be a few weeks late with decisions. Snow, am I right?"

If y'all aren't literally suspended in a glacier...

One of my REU rejections basically said how awesome I was but cited the NSF's minority clause for why I didn't get the REU. like wut.

[mockturtle]

One of my REU rejections basically said how awesome I was but cited the NSF's minority clause for why I didn't get the REU. like wut.

Like, they said that personally? Or was it a formulaic "we get a lot of strong applicants but ultimately must seek to recruit the most diverse cohort" yadda yadda something like that?

 

The one rejection I got (from UCBerkeley) just stressed repeatedly that this shouldn't preclude us applying to their graduate programs.

...Which is honestly the most reassuring thing they could have possibly said because that is exactly where my mind went.

[ERR_Alpha]

Like, they said that personally? Or was it a formulaic "we get a lot of strong applicants but ultimately must seek to recruit the most diverse cohort" yadda yadda something like that?

The one rejection I got (from UCBerkeley) just stressed repeatedly that this shouldn't preclude us applying to their graduate programs.

...Which is honestly the most reassuring thing they could have possibly said because that is exactly where my mind went.

In an email just to me:

Please be aware that REU selection has many constraints which operates under a number of conditions/preferences besides perceived applicant quality: prearranged distribution of 1 REU per faculty, maintaining diversity in class year, gender, geography, and underrepresented groups participation, and exclusion of non-US citizens or resident. Some of this is promoted by NSF. Therefore, we end up excluding many exceptional students like yourself from the program and it in no way reflects how a graduate school application would fair.

It was nice to hear, I guess. Hahahah. They pushed really hard for me to apply. I didn't wind up applying in the end.

[mockturtle]

In an email just to me:

Please be aware that REU selection has many constraints which operates under a number of conditions/preferences besides perceived applicant quality: prearranged distribution of 1 REU per faculty, maintaining diversity in class year, gender, geography, and underrepresented groups participation, and exclusion of non-US citizens or resident. Some of this is promoted by NSF. Therefore, we end up excluding many exceptional students like yourself from the program and it in no way reflects how a graduate school application would fair.

It was nice to hear, I guess. Hahahah. They pushed really hard for me to apply. I didn't wind up applying in the end.

Yeesh. I can't bring myself to disparage REU sites' affirmative action practices (nor would I want to), buuuut I still hope I don't end up falling into that hole. A few of the sites I've applied to stress that more heavily than others and it makes me worry.

[dr. t]

"...the Graduate School of Arts and Sciences is unable to take favorable action on your application to the Department of History..."

 

... What.

[MidwesternAloha]

"...the Graduate School of Arts and Sciences is unable to take favorable action on your application to the Department of History..."

 

... What.

Ugh. I hate those letters..my rejection letter stated that they "hoped I would pursue graduate education elsewhere." Gee, thanks.

[Sarochan]

Wisdom teeth. They were painful when they emerged, they're painful now, and it's going to be painful when they're removed in a couple weeks. Monetarily painful as well. Plus, it's only the first step in a long journey to dental happiness! Thanks, body, for making these extra teeth.

[maelia8]

I'm not sure how to categorize this, but when people say things like:

 

"I had two jobs full time while being a single parent and going to grad school.  It's easy if you know how to work hard."

 

"I only get 4 hours of sleep a night.  It's no problem if you're ambitious."

 

"I lost all my pregnancy weight in two weeks.  Anyone can do it if they don't make excuses."

 

I'm not a very competitive person, but it irks me when people try to compete over silly things like who's period hurts the least.

 

THIS, so much. I really, really value my sleep, and if I get less than 8-9 hours, I just fall asleep everywhere at random times of the day and can't seem to get anything done at all. I was talking to fellow cohort members today about sleep and one guy was saying that he can get by with 5-6 hours every day and drinking tons of coffee. Why are my "excessive" sleeping and refusal to rely on caffeine indicative of lower work ethic? Ugh.