Don't want to feel like I'm always bragging

[bsharpe269]

I'm really bad at handling situations where you put me in a room with a bunch of people who I feel like I have little in common with. I was in a situation like this last night.. bunch of people who I don't know, mostly stay at home moms, factory workers, etc. I always get asked what I do for a living. I really don't like being asked this...I respond by saying that I am in grad school but more questions always follow and I end up saying that I study biophysics and then answer questions about what that is and what exactly I study.

 

I don't actually mind talking about this stuff. I love my field, I love chatting about it. What bothers me is that I end up trying to downplay it for fear of sounding like I'm bragging. I feel like people get self conscious when I say that I am finishing my MS and starting my PhD in the fall. I always say that biophysics sounds way more complicated than it is, try to discuss it minimally, and then try to let the other people talk about their work. Sometimes someone does something really interesting that I dont know about (one person last night was a fisherman!) and its great to ask them questions too. Most people say that they teach or are a stay at home mom or something though and outside of asking what grade, there isn't much to talk about there. I know nothing about sports or celebrities, the topics of conversation last night. I always end up not knowing what to say to people and am left feeling like the small bit of conversation we had just makes me sound full of myself.

 

Do you guys ever deal with this awkwardness in mentioning that you are working on your PhD? I don't want mentioning my work to feel so uncomfortable. Most people can chat about their work or hobbies (watching football for example) without an issue. I feel like mentioning my interests is different though and ends up just sounding like I am bragging the whole time. Have you guys found a way to talk about your work in a way that others can relate to better? Do you avoid it in general?

Edited May 2, 2015 by bsharpe269

[MathCat]

I don't have an answer, but studying math is like this, even as an undergrad. A lot of people are really intimidated by math, but it's not like everyone in math is a genius. It's just a different kind of brain.... It really kills a conversation, though I'm terrible at social events.

[1Q84]

I'm really bad at handling situations where you put me in a room with a bunch of people who I feel like I have little in common with. I was in a situation like this last night.. bunch of people who I don't know, mostly stay at home moms, factory workers, etc. I always get asked what I do for a living. I really don't like being asked this...I respond by saying that I am in grad school but more questions always follow and I end up saying that I study biophysics and then answer questions about what that is and what exactly I study.

 

I don't actually mind talking about this stuff. I love my field, I love chatting about it. What bothers me is that I end up trying to downplay it for fear of sounding like I'm bragging. I feel like people get self conscious when I say that I am finishing my MS and starting my PhD in the fall. I always say that biophysics sounds way more complicated than it is, try to discuss it minimally, and then try to let the other people talk about their work. Sometimes someone does something really interesting that I dont know about (one person last night was a fisherman!) and its great to ask them questions too. Most people say that they teach or are a stay at home mom or something though and outside of asking what grade, there isn't much to talk about there. I know nothing about sports or celebrities, the topics of conversation last night. I always end up not knowing what to say to people and am left feeling like the small bit of conversation we had just makes me sound full of myself.

 

Do you guys ever deal with this awkwardness in mentioning that you are working on your PhD? I don't want mentioning my work to feel so uncomfortable. Most people can chat about their work or hobbies (watching football for example) without an issue. I feel like mentioning my interests is different though and ends up just sounding like I am bragging the whole time. Have you guys found a way to talk about your work in a way that others can relate to better? Do you avoid it in general?

 

I'm uncomfortable with your assertion that factory workers, teachers, and stay at home moms don't have anything "interesting" to talk about. Perhaps you need to dig a little deeper? You didn't actually provide any concrete examples of why you think these people would perceive your normal conversation as bragging anyway. Instead of operating on the weird assumption that everyone thinks that your field of work is superior or feel condescended to or intimidated when you explain how it works, perhaps you would be better off working on your conversational skill instead. There are plenty of things to talk about with people aside from careers and hobbies--the fact that you can't think of anything to talk about outside of work suggests maybe the problem is not as external as you think. 

 

Anyway, if I ever get the same feeling, I'm just self-deprecating about my work and that usually lightens the mood.

[Cheshire_Cat]

I'm in accounting, and apparently only smart people do accounting, so I already get the "I could never do math" thing a lot.  I usually just have some self deprecating thing to say about it.  Probably when I'm in a Ph.D program, I'll mention that what I want to do with it is research and teach accounting, "because ya know, those who can't do teach..." or something like that.  I don't think most people know what to make of Ph.D students other than "Oh wow, that person is smart!"  but I don't feel like they think you are bragging for being in a Ph.D program.  More likely they are wondering why you couldn't get a "real job" or something like that.

 

The key to being interesting is being interested.  Repeat this ten times before you go to bed, every night for a year.  I used to be terrible at small talk, or any talk, actually, but now I've gotten complements on how good a conversationalist I am.

You really don't have to know much about sports or celebrities, as long as you ask questions about them and listen well.  During football season, I generally keep an eye on the W/L records of the teams everyone loves here, and read a few news articles as they come across my newsfeed.  I repeat the opinions in the news articles or, better yet, disagree with them and then listen to people say whatever they want to say.

 

Most of my conversations don't revolve around work or hobbies though.  Generally they revolve around experiences.  One of my coworkers and I talked for 30 mins yesterday about our parent's spending habits, ect.  And when all else fails, you can talk about the weather.  I'm not kidding.  Not "Oh, it's hot outside" "Yes it is" but say something about what you think about the weather "It's hot outside and I have to mow the grass on Tuesday which is going to be such a chore..." "Yeah, I know! But I'd rather it be hot than it be cold any day.  At least you can go inside when it's hot. When it's cold it seems like you can never warm up..."  and then, you go with the flow.  That conversation may lead into what types of clothes are best for the weather, where the person has lived before, or how they have family in a different climate... and then you are set.  It takes practice.  I still hate talking about myself most of the time, and I felt so stupid when I first started trying small talk. I have journal entries where I wished I was legit mute so I would have an excuse to be quiet all the time.  But it is a useful skill, and shying away from it doesn't help anything.

[St Andrews Lynx]

NPR and high-quality newspapers/magazines (New Yorker, etc) are always a good reserve of small-talk fuel, especially in response to what people are telling you about themselves ("oh, you teach kindergarten? I heard on the radio the other day that they are implementing [interesting early education pilot program] in Colorado, do you think that would be a success?"). Asking people about the TV shows they are watching or recent films they've seen is another good way to find common ground. 

 

From talking to people from all walks of life, it actually seems like the teaching part of my grad school life is what others can relate to. They might not understand the intricacies of my chemistry sub-sub-field...but they can understand and empathise with my teaching responsibilities. They also don't need much prior pedagogical knowledge to understand classroom anecdotes.

 

The keys to interacting with folk from different social situations is (i) respectfulness (just because they dropped out of high school doesn't mean there is nothing you can learn from them (ii) a sense of humour (iii) interest in what they are saying. That way even if you don't say much during the gathering, they will still remember you as a respectful, interested person with a sense of humour.

[TakeruK]

One common reaction that I really dislike is when the other person says something like "Wow, you're a scientist, you must be so smart!! I was so bad at math/physics/whatever in school, I could never imagine doing this. That is so cool!" 

 

I don't like encountering this reaction because firstly, I think this view of scientists is harmful to public perception of science. Scientists are humans doing a job, just like other professions, fishers, doctors, teachers, plumbers etc. Secondly, this puts me in a kind of awkward situation...what do I say? If I disagree with them (and say something in the vein of "no, I'm sure you're smart enough to do it!") then it sounds very patronizing. I could also self-deprecate and downplay how cool/hard it is, but then that feels a lot like I'm downplaying science, and I don't want them to come out thinking that science isn't that great either. My current solution is to just side-step the issue and just say something like how much the topic excites me etc.

 

I also often use self-deprecation as a way to interact with others and help others feel more comfortable. I don't mind laughing at myself. But I am realising that the encounter I describe above (which I dislike having) is because the other person is also trying to use self-deprecation. So that doesn't always work!!

 

I find that conversations seem to go most smoothly when we talk more about experiences and what we find interesting rather than just the job. Sometimes the "what do you do?" question is just an ice breaker and they don't really want to hear about your job and so it's best to move on from that. Like others said above, sharing experiences is something most people can relate to. Also, discussing current events (non-controversial ones) is good too. I admit that I don't see myself as a very good conversationalist so in some situations, I actually research conversation topics beforehand so that I feel more confident in my ability to make small talk. 

 

Oh and finally, I generally avoid saying that I'm a MS or PhD student. When people ask "What do you do?", I just say that I am a Planetary Scientist and I study planets around other star systems. The experiences I tend to share that I feel people can relate to are things like experiences teaching students, making mistakes due to sleep deprivation when staying up late to observe, or frustrations that everyone encounters related to work, such as traffic, doing taxes, needing that coffee in the morning etc.

[Page228]

The response to philosophy as a discipline is different (it's less intimidating than the hard sciences) but just saying "grad school" can prompt replies like "You must be smart" or, worse, the same rephrased as a question: "So are you really smart then?" Both make me uncomfortable.

But in terms of talking to other people, you shouldn't worry too much. Most people love to talk about their kids, if they have them. Stay at home moms should be easy to get talking. Everybody hates the majority of drivers in any given area, so you can always talk about the trials of commuting. (If you take the bus you probably have even better stories.) The weather was a good suggestion. If you like something someone is wearing, comment on it. Ask where he or she got it. Talk about the best places to go for hikes, walks, food, drinks, the movies, concerts, etc. Talk about travel. Talk about tea vs. coffee. Talk about the latest news story about how everything in our food supply is basically poison. You're a human. They're humans. You have things in common.

I spent awhile outside of academia, in a couple of very different groups. If you're willing to meet the group you're in halfway, you can almost always find something to discuss. As for the questions about your studies, it's not bragging to talk about what you do. I doubt many people are terribly jealous; they're just interested. Most people remember disliking science class in high school, and have absolutely no desire to take your place.

[Taeyers]

I don't feel like I'm bragging when I explain what I do because I never assume that someone who's on a different path in life would think my choices are better or more impressive than theirs. Just as much as I wouldn't want to be a stay-at-home mom or a kindergarten teacher, SAH moms and kindergarten teachers probably wouldn't want to be biomed PhD students. Truth is, I've noticed that our demographic values intellectual pursuits much more than most people, and frankly they might not be that impressed by just how very smart we are because their worlds don't revolve around that. They might value good interpersonal skills or responsible parenting above all else. That's one neat thing about people - everyone has their own strengths, and the world wouldn't work if everyone only wanted to do the "challenging" things and not the ones that they're best suited for. So what I do is just answer directly without trying too hard to make my work seem less impressive than it sounds. Then I realize that they might actually be feeling bad for me because making more money, having long-term job security, or raising 3 kids by my age is probably exactly what they wanted for themselves and they wouldn't take my place no matter what. Or they think I'm a deranged maniac because of things I do with mice...

 

ETA: to clarify, by answer directly I mean that I say I'm a physiology PhD student. If probed again, I answer that I work in a lab researching [insert several-word blurb about target disease]. I may clarify that it's mouse work if it seems appropriate for the audience. I don't usually go into more detail, and I'm never really asked to. I suppose it helps that often people have no idea what "physiology" is, so the name of my field impresses no one. 

Edited May 3, 2015 by Taeyers

[victorydance]

I feel like people get self conscious when I say that I am finishing my MS and starting my PhD in the fall.

 

Chances are actually a lot greater that they really don't care. 

[beccamayworth]

Most people say that they teach or are a stay at home mom or something though and outside of asking what grade, there isn't much to talk about there. 

 

There's always stuff to talk about! "What's your favorite thing about doing X?", "That sounds challenging because of Y. What has your experience been like?", "When did you realize you wanted to do Z?". 

[MathCat]

One common reaction that I really dislike is when the other person says something like "Wow, you're a scientist, you must be so smart!! I was so bad at math/physics/whatever in school, I could never imagine doing this. That is so cool!" 

 

I don't like encountering this reaction because firstly, I think this view of scientists is harmful to public perception of science. Scientists are humans doing a job, just like other professions, fishers, doctors, teachers, plumbers etc. Secondly, this puts me in a kind of awkward situation...what do I say? If I disagree with them (and say something in the vein of "no, I'm sure you're smart enough to do it!") then it sounds very patronizing. I could also self-deprecate and downplay how cool/hard it is, but then that feels a lot like I'm downplaying science, and I don't want them to come out thinking that science isn't that great either. My current solution is to just side-step the issue and just say something like how much the topic excites me etc.

Yes, this is the most uncomfortable part. I say I study math, and people almost always say something like "You must be so smart!" (or, as Page228 says, they phrase it as a question, which is even worse). I don't know what to say to that. Usually people get a slightly sick look on their face, and (I think, at least) don't want to hear anything more about it. Or, they ask questions about what I do, but it is extremely hard for me to answer in an understandable yet truthful way - math is a very inaccessible field. I don't want to oversimplify, because anything I can come up with to explain it (e.g. "I study the theory of calculus" instead of "I'm studying analysis") gives the wrong idea about what I do and what I like about it - I don't like computation at all, for instance, and actually have almost no interest in calculus. They usually want to hear about what applications there are, but I'm interested in pure math - I really couldn't care less about the applications. Non-math folks tend not to really get this, which is understandable given that most people's exposure to math is entirely computational. I want people to understand the difference, and that math is really more about logic and puzzle solving than about crunching numbers all day, but I find it hard to explain.

 

The worst part is that after the "You must be so smart!" exchange, when I try to turn the conversation to them instead, people often shut it down, or seem embarrassed when they answer, as if my doing math is somehow more impressive (to be clear, I don't believe this to be true, it's just the vibe I get). It feels like I've intimidated them, which makes me feel bad, but I don't know how to prevent it. If that doesn't happen, I can usually keep the conversation going pretty well, so I don't actually consider myself a terrible conversationalist, I guess.

Edited May 3, 2015 by MathCat

[maelia8]

As someone in the humanities, I have had the opposite experience: rather than people finding my subject unapproachable, it seems that everyone has something to say about history, and some have even been comfortable with "correcting" me about historical facts or timelines to my face (if they saw The Tudors , then they must be experts)! There's always something to talk about, but half of the time it's me trying to put on a game face as I listen to someone place my field of interest two centuries out of date or try to impress me with their foreign language skills (which usually means two garbled sentences).

 

Usually I'm pretty patient and am willing to just listen and tell rather than contradict, but sometimes it really gets to me. The worst is when people ask me how I "research" history, since we already know everything that has happened, especially in the 19th and 20th centuries (they read it in a high school textbook, so it must be true!). Some people patently refuse to believe that cutting-edge research can be done in history, and insist that I'm just doing some really advanced training to teach high school social studies. 

 

Ah well, I guess it means I'll always have something to talk about!

[GeoDUDE!]

I know nothing about sports or celebrities, the topics of conversation last night. I always end up not knowing what to say to people and am left feeling like the small bit of conversation we had just makes me sound full of myself.

 

If you don't know something, why not ask what it is?  

 

Sometimes having a conversation in a topic you dont know anything about, very little, or even not much interest in can be a point of entry into an even better conversation. 

[ERR_Alpha]

My least favorite reaction, by far is "OMG you're a biochem PhD??? Is it like the Big Bang Theory??? Do you watch Breaking Bad? Can you make meth?"

I'm also terrible at recovering from these things. I also wear my emotions on my face so when people try to say my life is like a completely stupid tv show (Big Bang) there really isn't any recovery possible. I usually try to ask them questions about what they do. One of my cohort mates girlfriends teaches special ed and we had a very indepth conversation about testing, IEPs, and the like.

[bsharpe269]

Chances are actually a lot greater that they really don't care. 

 

Well the reason that I asked this question is because they DO. The question was prompted by a conversation I had with my SO today. He is works in business and is a much more social person than I am.  I mentioned to him that I feel like whenever we go out, conversations just get killed once people ask what i do. He said that it is just because academia is so far from what most people are familiar with. I am not saying that academia is better or worse... it is just really different so many people don't connect with it.

 

I'm uncomfortable with your assertion that factory workers, teachers, and stay at home moms don't have anything "interesting" to talk about. Perhaps you need to dig a little deeper? You didn't actually provide any concrete examples of why you think these people would perceive your normal conversation as bragging anyway. Instead of operating on the weird assumption that everyone thinks that your field of work is superior or feel condescended to or intimidated when you explain how it works, perhaps you would be better off working on your conversational skill instead. There are plenty of things to talk about with people aside from careers and hobbies--the fact that you can't think of anything to talk about outside of work suggests maybe the problem is not as external as you think. 

 

Anyway, if I ever get the same feeling, I'm just self-deprecating about my work and that usually lightens the mood.

 

I'm sure they have interesting stuff to talk about! After describing what i do then like TakeruK said, people always make comments about how smart I must be which leaves me (an antisocial person to begin with) in a really awkward position of not knowing how to respond. I completely agree that the problem is with my conversational skills and not external which is why I wanted to know if others on here have better ways of carrying out conversation after the topic of work comes up.

 

Mathcat, what you describe is EXACTLY what I am talking about. People seem to shut down. It seems as if I am put in a different category in their mind (not better or worse... just weird and different or something). When I try to ask them questions about their work, they just seem to not want to go into detail really. I'm not good at conversation to begin with so I never know how to save it once it has gotten bad. Then I am just left feeling bad for how horrible the interaction went (and thats when I start wondering if I sounded like I was bragging and thats why it went bad). Like math, I think people find biophysics really inaccessible. Many people seem to dislike science and math and when they hear that you're getting a PhD in that, they assume you are a genius or something. Its obviously not true... I am sure that most of us were just exposed to math/science when we were young in a way that made it seem cool.

 

Haha maelia8, that would be frustrating! Everyone's advice is helpful. I will try talking about experiences instead of hobbies. Maybe I'll have more luck with that. I can try asking questions about sports and stuff too but my knowledge is so basic that my questions would be at the level of "what sport are we talking about?"

[Sigaba]

I think that a couple of you are dogpiling on bsharpe269 without having carefully read the OP. This dogpiling is ironic given the fact that one of you recently asked for help in another thread and received guidance, not unsolicited personal criticisms.

 

@bsharpe269, the dilemma you face is that you are on the cutting edge of knowledge in a highly specialized field of expertise. As you learn more, you will be less able to communicate effectively what you know and why it is important to non-specialists. 

 

I recommend that you find works geared towards general audiences  in which very complicated topics are made more accessible to those who are not specialists. (Henry Petroski is an example of what I mean.)  With practice and patience--mostly with yourself--you will find ways to "break down" what you do so it sounds simple without being simplistic, and then to communicate that information without alienating or off putting to others unfamiliar with your discipline.

 

 

[1Q84]

I think that a couple of you are dogpiling on bsharpe269 without having carefully read the OP. This dogpiling is ironic given the fact that one of you recently asked for help in another thread and received guidance, not unsolicited personal criticisms.

 

 

There's no real irony here. I read carefully enough. As you are referring to me obliquely, and my thread asking for advice, I'd like to point out that I didn't condescendingly refer to people lower in class than me as I asked for advice. Perhaps that's why I wasn't dogpiled on?

[Mechanician2015]

Well in my country, most people think that my career (mechanical engineering) is about cars. The irony reaches a maximum when (1) there is zero automotive courses in the program I completed. It's mostly thermal sciences and manufacture. (2) The terminology is not used in my school, but if it was, my thesis and course work is more focused on theoretical mechanics, numerical modelling and simulation and theory of mechanical vibrations (3) I have zero interest in cars :-/ 

 

As I am interested in scientific literacy, I try to develop ways of explaining people what mechanics (as science) is, what the job of an engineer is, and the difference between a theorist and an engineer. It's hard to do, but I try to keep it pragmatic.

 

I am not a graduate student, but even outside of my academic interests, my personal interests are weird and most people don't even know about their existence(had such a hard time finding someone that at least KNEW who Soren Kierkegard was...). When stablishing a conversation, I kind of "switch" and try to keep things trivial, and ask the other person to elaborate on their opinions and experiences. (Presumably) Unlike you, I have a couple years of experience in the industry, and as a supervisor you need to learn how to develop these conversations. Practice is essential. Also, forget you need to "do well" in a conversation.

 

The question "what are your interests/what do you do in your free time?" Is really useful. If you ask it first, you will have an idea of what you can work with (“you watch TV series? Have you heard of game fo thrones!?"... Even if they don't watch it, they will tell you that they have been told it's good/too aggressive/whatever). If you are asked the question, you can always keep it general to see what comes up. I tell people that I like to read, watching movies, cooking and listening to music.(I don't tell them I read mostly Sci Fi of the 60's and philosophy of the 40's, nor that I almost exclusively watch independent movies, or listen to Goa Trance and Black metal). This general description of yourself allows you to get an idea of what might be a common point with the other person.

 

I do understand Mathcat in that he is a theorist. However, you would be amazed how easily can you explain the potential implications of very theoretical work. (Say, the "Perlman-Poincare" theorem has implications in medicine and tumor growth. How? I have no idea, but in my experience, most people won't ask for a very complex explanation. A vague explanation suffices most of the times). But I do understand the "I couldn’t care less about the applications", I feel the same way about dynamics.

 

The best response I can give to "gee, you must be very smart/a genious", is to ignore the expression and appeal to humanity (food, drink, music, family). I am fully convinced that Ed Witten can have a conversation with an illiterate monk about how they both enjoy having tea, and how one prefers it with a splash of milk or honey.

 

I love when I am forced to tell someone I plan to go to grad school and they react as described by  victory dance. It's just a job. It's just a decision.

 

TL;DR: Try to listen carefully and use it to follow the conversation. Keep things relatively general, until you find something in common. Try to find general( vague, if you will) applications of your research. Most people don't want a class, they'll make a couple questions and the conversation will move on.

[GeoDUDE!]

As you learn more, you will be less able to communicate effectively what you know and why it is important to non-specialists. 

 

I cannot disagree with this statement enough. If you cannot explain something to a non-specialist you have not really learned it. For many NSF grants there is a public abstract (one for the general tax payers to read) and a specialist abstract. While you might go into detail with a specialist, but I can explain my research to someone without a college education. I know because I've talked to high schoolers about it. 

 

Perhaps my research isn't as esoteric or technical as some others here.  

Edited May 3, 2015 by GeoDUDE!

[Sigaba]

There's no real irony here. I read carefully enough. As you are referring to me obliquely, and my thread asking for advice, I'd like to point out that I didn't condescendingly refer to people lower in class than me as I asked for advice. Perhaps that's why I wasn't dogpiled on?

 

@1Q84, the irony is that you are telling someone that they should look inward after admitting that you don't know how to call yourself on your own b.s.

[1Q84]

@1Q84, the irony is that you are telling someone that they should look inward after admitting that you don't know how to call yourself on your own b.s.

My question was about my personal growth as a writer. This thread was presented as a question on inter-class interaction. Are you trying to play dumb or are you actually dumb enough to muck rake across completely different sub-forums? I get that you have some sort of grudge against me since you like to throw mud at every single post I make outside of the English forum but I think you're trying to pick a fight where there is none. But hey, keep going if it makes your Saturday night.

[Sigaba]

I cannot disagree with this statement enough. If you cannot explain something to a non-specialist you have not really learned it. For many NSF grants there is a public abstract (one for the general tax payers to read) and a specialist abstract. While you might go into detail with a specialist, but I explain my research to someone without a college education. I know because I've talked to high schoolers about it. 

 

Perhaps my research isn't as esoteric or technical as some others here.  

 

@GeDUDE!  the operative term is "less able," not "unable." A social historian who specializes in modern Germany can thumbnail the atomization of everyday life as a key factor in the rise of the Nazi dictatorship, but the attendant points about the long nineteenth century and the manifold, trans-Atlantic debates over the history of everyday life, and the geopolitical implications of those debates are going to be left out of the mix. 

 

(FWIW, the foundation of the statement is my understanding of the work of K. Anders Ericsson and his peers. YMMV.)

[MathCat]

Mathcat, what you describe is EXACTLY what I am talking about. People seem to shut down. It seems as if I am put in a different category in their mind (not better or worse... just weird and different or something). When I try to ask them questions about their work, they just seem to not want to go into detail really.

Yes, I think we have similar experiences. People tend to ask what I do as an opener, so I can't really avoid it. I think they then see me as somebody completely different from them. I wonder if it's stereotypes of mathematicians (and other scientists) from TV and other sources at play. It's like they don't expect that I also watch the TV shows or movies they watch (or whatever) because of it. I'm just as happy to talk about the most recent episode of Game of Thrones or the new Marvel movie as my friends in other fields would be. I find the conversation dies when I return the question and ask what they do (seems like the polite thing to do), but maybe I'd have more success if I went straight into asking about hobbies...

 

@Mechanician2015 Because I have no interest in applications, I'm also quite unaware of them when they do exist. To me, and most of the professors who taught my courses (also pure mathematicians), an application is a use of this theorem in some other area of pure math, haha. @GeoDUDE!, I think you're right, and if I was more of an expert I would probably have better analogies or examples that I could use to explain ideas to a general audience.

[FantasticalDevPsych]

Very interesting topic and I’m surprised someone from Psychology hasn’t chimed in on this yet!

While I’m not in as much of a technical field as many others here, I’ve encountered this challenge before with the language I use to explain aspects of my field that people know about but just don’t know what it was called in technical language. And I learned recently that sometimes research psychologists are thought of as weird by the community when trying to recruit participants (learned from a POI on interviews) as well as talking to others about that no in fact I don't/won't psychoanalyze you or your child (such a common question, no we are not all clinical!). Haven't gotten the smart comments as I'm an undergrad and not sure if I will...

I openly admit I don’t have to worry as much about finding a common topic of discussion as I get a lot of kid stories (or explanations about why they don’t like kids) when I mention what I study. (So yes asking Stay at Home moms about their kids is a very good way to get them talking...) Though I do agree that there is some very good advice about finding another common topic already (such as from Page228)!

I agree with GeoDude! on explaing your work. I’m not a grad student yet (undergrad – waiting on my last chance of admission this year) but have worked with specialists (my PI and lab mates) and nonspecialists (parents from many different backgrounds) since I’ve started doing research. At first it was actually much harder for me to talk to parents about what I was doing as I had a little blurb on what we were doing in nonspecialist terms that we used to recruit but I couldn’t figure out what to say when a parent asked something else. When I had my own study and more technical knowledge, I found it easier to further explain what I was doing even to a nontechnical audience (and have to children, parents, and other undergrads). I think my increase in knowledge allowed me to begin to think about my work in different ways and at least for now feel like I’ve arrived upon a way to explain my current work to specialists and nonspecialists.

And I like the advice about trying to find some practical implication of whatever you are studying that makes it interesting to others (some application to a well known disease, interesting application of a theorem, etc). I'm currently writing an interdisciplinary lit review thesis (my second UG one) and once got the advice of making sure to try and be able to answer “why should I care?” when this “I” is someone from various backgrounds (another academic in your field, another academic in a closely related field, someone who knows nothing about your topic, etc).

I think the best advice for learning how to explain your work to others is just to practice doing so!

Oh and my dad is a prof in a very technical field that is not well known to nonspecialists so sometimes when I'm asked about it I just have to explain very generally what the field is, what technique he uses in his work, and a very broad application of his work and they are satisfied.

(Long thesis writing procrastination post over)

Edited May 3, 2015 by FantasticalDevPsych

[Sigaba]

My question was about my personal growth as a writer. This thread was presented as a question on inter-class interaction. Are you trying to play dumb or are you actually dumb enough to muck rake across completely different sub-forums? I get that you have some sort of grudge against me since you like to throw mud at every single post I make outside of the English forum but I think you're trying to pick a fight where there is none. But hey, keep going if it makes your Saturday night.

 

@1Q84, The OP posed three specific questions. Rather than addressing those questions, you have attempted to lecture on "inter-class interaction." By doing so, you have sought to make this thread about you at the expense of helping a fellow graduate student who goes out of her way to help others.

 

On another topic. I don't throw mud at "every single post" of yours outside of the English forum. (That you would make such a hyperbolic statement, or think that I have a "grudge" against you underscores your admission that you don't know how to call yourself on your own b.s. and that you need to grow as a writer.) Instead, I offered counterpoints to a handful of your posts that I found controversial. 

 

If you cannot handle someone disagreeing with you without turning to name calling or developing fantasies about being persecuted or attempting to be snarky, the next stage of your journey is going to be especially difficult for you-- students (undergraduates and graduates) at your next stop are very competitive.