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Linelei

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Everything posted by Linelei

  1. I don't know that much about what academic careers in International Relations actually look like, research-wise. I know that I was advised against a UK PhD because, in my field, research is vital and 3 years is considered by some over here as too short to get a true grounding in research methods. American students who study in the UK also can be at a disadvantage because, (again, hearsay) the PhD programs there tend to provide less guidance. However, if you are originally from there, you would probably not have trouble with cultural differences in academic arrangements. When I was considering Cambridge, one of my advisors suggested that, were I to study there, I would probably need to do either a longer post-doc or a second one in order to be considered competitive in the US for faculty positions. So it might not save you time if you decide to work in the US, but there are ways to overcome it. But if you are leaning towards working outside the US, that could save you time and would give you a well-known alma mater, which would be a definite plus. Again, I don't really know if any of this applies to your field!
  2. If you begin to feel that, even were you to be accepted at all other schools, you would go to THIS one, then accept. But it sounds like it is still "one" of your top picks, in which case I would certainly wait, because you may feel differently if you get an acceptance from one of your other top picks. I guess what I'm saying is that there is a difference between being sure that a program is the one for you and just wanting it to be over. For the former, accepting seems like the respectful thing to do so that other schools don't waste time reviewing your application and other applicants can be reviewed. For the latter, you might regret rushing it and more information will probably help clarify your feelings.
  3. I guess it depends on where you are and the formality of the program. At a California school, only one interviewee was in a suit while the rest were 'business casual,' probably like the outfit you ended up wearing. I certainly wouldn't email now! There's a chance the grad students you spoke to passed along the story, anyway, especially if they thought it was funny and liked you. Let's just hope your demeanor and application and personality won them over.
  4. There is a similar thread here: But basically what I said there is that I already made lists and was systematic about which schools I applied to, so now I am going with the feel of the place and the feeling I get interacting with the place. My situation may be different because I didn't apply to safety schools and they were all pretty much equal caliber. So what matters most to me in the decision process is feeling like I can like the people I'm working with and be happy over the next five or six years in that environment. And for me, that means trusting my instinct!
  5. What everyone else said, with this extra: If, now that you have some really great offers, your opinion on some of the others schools has changed drastically, it might make sense to withdraw. For example, if location suddenly has become more important to you now that you could live somewhere awesome like Berkeley, and there are some locations that just couldn't compare anymore. Or the same with potential advisors, or any other criteria important to you. Having acceptances can change how you feel about other programs, and if you now feel it is practically 100% unlikely you would choose to attend some of the others, given your acceptances, withdrawing your application seems like a polite thing to do for all involved. But if you still think you might choose a school about your existing acceptances, by all means wait it out! After all, you paid the application fee.
  6. I don't have any knowledge or advice to offer you, RubyBright, but I just wanted to say I'm sorry you're dealing with this! It does not sound greedy at all to be worried about money, and you are right that it makes a big difference. Do you know when you'll hear from the other programs you applied to?
  7. I steer clear of "Regards" because of a bad experience a friend had once. He typed his closing instead of using a signature, and accidentally hit a t instead of g (they are very close to each other). So his email to his boss said: Retards, John ....I just use "Thanks" or "Sincerely" because now I am paranoid!
  8. Cheetos puffs and twizzlers. Secret confession... I totally went to a dollar store on the other side of town to buy some, because I didn't want them to recognize me as the cheetos-puffs-and-twizzlers girl!
  9. I'm going to go ahead and say my real criterion: my gut feeling. The thing is, I went through all the logical, make-lists-of-pros-and-cons stuff when I chose the few programs to which I would be applying. They were all fabulous on paper, and I spent hours and hours learning about the intricate details of the programs. So now it is about my gut, emotional reaction when I interact with the people in the program. There is research to support the gut instinct system of decision-making, too! I'm not nuts! When a. we know a lot about the subject (as those of us who have obsessed over school and lab websites do for grad school info), and b. the costs and benefits are complex yet differences between choices are very subtle, we tend to be pretty good at summing up descriptive information and making a correct intuitive leap. I can't find the article, but I remember a study that found if people were given unlimited time to analyze a situation and assess the pros and cons, they actually made the 'better' choice less often than those who were given a very limited time to make an intuitive decision. Plus they tended to feel less "satisfied" with their choice after the fact. So, basically, as long as I have funding, I'm going with the place that feels the most right. If spreadsheets work best for you, definitely do that, but this is the system that works best for me!
  10. I just want to say that, after reading through this thread, I am overflowing with warm fuzzies for y'all out there. Sophiak is one of our own, and so many people offered support and wisdom. It makes me very happy that there are such wonderful people in our community willing to help someone in need. Congrats on your acceptance, Sophiak! And also congrats on the courage to see a counselor. I don't think anyone should ever be ashamed for getting professional help - do we feel ashamed about going to a doctor when we have pneumonia? And yet it truly takes courage to take that step, so I applaud you for it!
  11. Oh man, that would be rough! So many variables and potential outcomes to consider! I feel like you could make a really good Doctor Who episode out of this, though: parallel worlds rifting off with each acceptance and decision of the other students out there, and you in the middle, trying to see it all and master the (your) universe. Or maybe I've been watching too much Doctor Who.
  12. For what it's worth after the fact, I think you did the right thing! I emailed a school because the online application said they were still processing my transcripts over a month after I submitted. Turns out there was a glitch in the system and they thought I was supposed to have another transcript. If I hadn't caught that, they would not have contacted me but just assumed I'd failed to meet the deadline. However, by emailing, it was cleared up right away and my application was marked 'complete.'
  13. Have you discussed the McNair research requirements with your mentor? Sometimes mentors have great ideas for projects you can take on that fit with their existing research lines. This approach is great for people new to research, because you have an expert on hand to help with all the theoretical questions/issues that come up. The mentor usually likes it, too, because they might have had a little idea bouncing around but didn't want to stick a grad student on a small project. Just be sure to make the timeline and restrictions clear, as you are probably going to want a project that is very limited in scope due to time constraints.
  14. Darwin, I know what you mean: I actually am not that stressed about waiting. I think it can be really difficult for us perfectionist overachieving students to have something this big feel out of our control. But trying to control the uncontrollable only increases our frustration and unhappiness. We've submitted, so now there's not much we can do to change things, other than just accept the uncertainty. Of course, that equanimity I've found is tested when it comes to the people around me! My mother and best friend are especially on edge wanting closure and certainty. It's definitely more difficult to keep that acceptance of uncertainty when the people around you are all, "MAKE THE DECISION ALREADY!" I just keep telling them that April 15th is not that far off. And I want to be clear that I would probably be having more trouble finding this equanimity if I didn't have an offer on the table. I have such compassion for those of you who truly have no idea what is coming next!
  15. Hi there! I would direct you to this thread: Basically, there is a chance your application was in the middle - not invited for interview, but not outright rejected either. You may be hearing after some people who receive offers decide to attend elsewhere. Although you may not, too; I think this process depends on the school, and this is all GradCafe hearsay. But I hope it helps a little!
  16. Aaaand now I've just lost two hours of my evening. And a lot of tea, spewed over my keyboard, while laughing!
  17. So Sorry! Once there was an applicant who didn't get in, but who wanted to so badly that she/he started revising applications for the next season, getting advice and support from fellow applicants and grad students on GradCafe, as well as helpful mentors. Then the applicant spent the next year doing everything possible to increase research experience and publications, and networked like mad. When he/she applied the next season, PIs were literally fighting it out Hunger Games style for the amazing applicant.
  18. I get variations of this one all the time, such as, "Oh, then you can diagnose/analyze me," or, "So you'll be able to prove ____ is crazy?" My favorite is: "So then you'll be able to read my mind?" To which I reply, "psychOLOGY is not the same as psychIC" or just, "Yes."
  19. I gave some small chocolates to those who hosted me and drove me to and from the airport. One thing I forgot to consider, though: one of my hosts was a vegan! So perhaps that is something to keep in mind in the future. I also sent thank you emails after the fact. The grad students seemed surprised but pleased, which is not a bad reaction. Regardless of whether they enjoy it or are getting reimbursed, I think it's just polite to give something when anyone lets you into the privacy of their home; I know whenever I have company I feel the need to straighten up, vacuum, wash towels, etc, so it's reciprocity for that extra bit of work.
  20. I would like to point out that, as far as I can tell, this is a UK citizen who went through the UK system. I don't mean to make blanket, generalized statements (like the author of this blog did), but I have heard from multiple people that UK PhD programs tend to have far less guidance, support, and/or supervision than American programs. I'm sure there are people for whom independence and lack of guidance is a great work environment; I even tend to enjoy open-endedness and independence. But ultimately I decided not to apply to UK programs because I wanted more rigorous and guided training. I will hopefully have the rest of my career to be independent (within limits, of course). It's disturbing to me that this person doesn't take into account more differences in countries, subjects, and styles. My closest friends at my current institution are all grad students and, while they certainly are stressed about things sometimes, all in all their souls are not crushed and they have plenty of time and energy for relationships, friends, hobbies, and even outside work. Yes, I am fully expecting a PhD to be a ton of work. And I have also heard the transition can be very difficult if you are a traditional student who goes straight to grad school. But come on: insisting that your experience of a "soul-killing ordeal" is the norm for everyone else? That hyperbolic style really puts me off.
  21. Hahaha! What are you going to do with you daughter?! You'd think people never move or something.
  22. Congrats!!! I'm sure it's a bit frustrating to have two waitlist situations, but if it were me I would see that as proof I am a good candidate with something that is catching their eye. We shouldn't forget that there is a certain amount of luck in this process having to do with how much funding a school has, who else applied this goaround, if the PI we want to work with has greater influence in the admission process relative to other faculty in the program, etc. On that last, I think it can change year to year, depending on when someone took students last and other factors we can only imagine. So even if you don't get officially admitted this time, the fact that two schools see potential in you is a great sign for next year. And of course there is still time for you to get in this round, so I am sending you good vibes!
  23. Hahaha! I apparently share my exact (uncommon) name with a very busty lingerie model. I really hope these schools aren't googling me and thinking I've paid my way through school by flashing cleavage... And Miskina: my LinkedIn profile was viewed by someone at a school where I was accepted, so I think it's a good sign!
  24. I did actually have a Plan B, which I forgot about with my acceptance: play Princess Leia at Disneyland. Because, after all, she's a Disney Princess now, and I could disappear behind those hair buns.
  25. Most of my research experience has nothing to do with my future research interests. I linked them in my statement by talking about my passion for research in general, and how I gained experience in areas X and Y. This experience then prepared me for pursuing a research career in Z, and my success in other areas shows I can handle and enjoy a variety of research areas. Only more eloquently than that. Hope that helps a bit!
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