0% Confidence of Acceptance

[antecedent]

I deal with this by finding encouragement in meaningless places.

Ex: "Oh, the UW Madison English department secretary is so friendly! She clearly wants me to go there." and "Look, the UT Austin application checklist is so well organized, how nice. This must mean I'll get in!"

I'm clearly delusional, and like many of you, borderline hysterical, but what can we do? If we get in, this is only the beginning.

We should have a drink of choice thread. I will put forth a nice cold wheat beer, to go with this already wine-soaked thread.

[lolopixie]

Amazingly, I have not had a drop of alcohol in the past 4 months. Just not feeling it. Coffee on the other hand...

[Enzian]

I have officially applied to Minnesota and Emory! I don't know if I should be elated or terrified!

I've finished five applications so far. The feeling right after you hit the "submit" button is absolutely horrible: one small moment of peaceful relief followed by hours of neurotically poring over the application printout (that can't be changed) to find typos and omissions.

And then the completely insane fears start: wait, what if the English I speak isn't the same English they speak? what if they're not accepting applications from the east coast this year? what if I'm too tall?

After sending my Duke app, I found a sentence in my SOP (which I'd proofread at least twenty times) that started "If When I finished the two year assignment..." WHERE DID THAT "IF" COME FROM?!!

I lost my mind for an hour and didn't talk to anyone. Just thinking about it now is elevating my heart rate.

Eight more to go.

[Timshel]

I've finished five applications so far. The feeling right after you hit the "submit" button is absolutely horrible: one small moment of peaceful relief followed by hours of neurotically poring over the application printout (that can't be changed) to find typos and omissions.

And then the completely insane fears start: wait, what if the English I speak isn't the same English they speak? what if they're not accepting applications from the east coast this year? what if I'm too tall?

After sending my Duke app, I found a sentence in my SOP (which I'd proofread at least twenty times) that started "If When I finished the two year assignment..." WHERE DID THAT "IF" COME FROM?!!

I lost my mind for an hour and didn't talk to anyone. Just thinking about it now is elevating my heart rate.

Eight more to go.

Oh my god, you printed out your applications? No way could I do that. I just have to release them and hope for the best or I will drive myself insane!

[antecedent]

I've finished five applications so far. The feeling right after you hit the "submit" button is absolutely horrible: one small moment of peaceful relief followed by hours of neurotically poring over the application printout (that can't be changed) to find typos and omissions.

And then the completely insane fears start: wait, what if the English I speak isn't the same English they speak? what if they're not accepting applications from the east coast this year? what if I'm too tall?

Oh man I know how that feels! And it never got easier! I submitted my "simplest" application first and the post-submission relief-anxiety cocktail only got worse after that.

And ditto on the insane fears. What if they hate Canadians? Or more likely, my wacky Canadian spelling? What if they're actually 24 hours ahead in Texas and I'm already late??

[MrBrooklyn]

I'm very nervous there may be a bias against babies dressed as penguins.

[Enzian]

Oh my god, you printed out your applications? No way could I do that. I just have to release them and hope for the best or I will drive myself insane!

Haha, I do realize how crazy that sounds but in my defense, I didn't actually print them out just reread the "printable version" that most of them will show you at the end. But yeah. Gotta stop.

What if they're actually 24 hours ahead in Texas and I'm already late??

I'm going to be thinking about this scenario every day between now and February.

Edited December 5, 2011 by Enzian

[Timshel]

Haha, I do realize how crazy that sounds but in my defense, I didn't actually print them out just reread the "printable version" that most of them will show you at the end. But yeah. Gotta stop.

Oh yeah. I skimmed the first one and then decided that I would only briefly look at them but not read them. You'll drive yourself crazy if you keep looking over them.

Edited December 5, 2011 by Timshel

[lolopixie]

There is NO WAY I will print out my applications. When they are done - they are DONE! I'm even mildly tempted to delete the SOPs and stuff off my computer when I'm done.

[cquin]

I'm very nervous there may be a bias against babies dressed as penguins.

I laughed way too hard at this.

[TripWillis]

I am not in this thread today. Today I am in "I am a genius who will get accepted" thread.

Now where is that thread?

[Mistral]

After my rejection nightmare last night, I have been here all day. Could I get rejected from a school that I didn't even apply to?

[HaruNoKaze]

Last night's dream was me getting in to UT and due to some mix up I got put in a dorm with a bunch of freshman. Then I took a bath in a crappy tub, went out to look for someplace else to live, and ended up at a movie theater. And in the dream I was all chill about how I got in to UT, like it was no big deal. So I assume this is a sign I'm not getting in to UT.

[antecedent]

Last night's dream was me getting in to UT and due to some mix up I got put in a dorm with a bunch of freshman. Then I took a bath in a crappy tub, went out to look for someplace else to live, and ended up at a movie theater. And in the dream I was all chill about how I got in to UT, like it was no big deal. So I assume this is a sign I'm not getting in to UT.

Sounds like a critique of freshman bathing practices to me...

[Timshel]

It sounds to me like UT is the most popular school here on the boards. I'm glad I didn't apply there. Stiff competition!

[antecedent]

It sounds to me like UT is the most popular school here on the boards. I'm glad I didn't apply there. Stiff competition!

And to think, before I began spending time on these fora I'd never so much as spoken to another UT Austin applicant. To be honest, I prefer knowing I'm not running blind into a crowd of strangers (if we can call eachither non-strangers). I haven't seen any other English Language folk hanging around, but they may just be calling themselves English Lit.

Can I also just say I'm totally in this thread today? In the back of my mind I've been mapping out my "Plan B" all morning. I'm trying to console myself with the thought that a Plan B doesn't require a long distance relationship but somehow grad school-rejected me doesn't seem to be all that consoled. Sigh. Pass the coffee.

Edited December 7, 2011 by antecedant

[wintergirl]

I don't really have a Plan B yet, but thankfully I got an encouraging email from DeVry University today that indicated they'd definitely accept me. Problems solved!

[Timshel]

I'm lucky that I do have a "Plan B" for now because I already have an adjunct position teaching English at a university, but it doesn't pay a lot, and it doesn't offer benefits, and my husband will be graduating with his masters in history in May and he does not have a job lined up, so it's still pretty scary. I mean, yes, I have a a job, but that doesn't mean my "Plan B" isn't problematic.

I am thoroughly convinced already that I am not going to get in anywhere, even though I have only submitted 3 applications, so I am definitely in this thread today.

[antecedent]

Yeah I have a nebulous Plan B that would require more training but wouldn't necessarily require graduate level training. It would also allow me to explore other options, and maybe get out of Vancouver (5 1/2 years is too many) while I decide what to do next. I don't think professional training wouldn't be quite as fulfilling as academic training for me, but who knows.

I am still going through the application confidence roller coaster...I feel like it would be easiest to not even think about it but I haven't learned that trick yet.

[rawera]

Plan B?

[rawera]

My plan is to waste $1000+ applying to programs that will reject me. It's going pretty well so far, I think.

[Timshel]

My plan is to waste $1000+ applying to programs that will reject me. It's going pretty well so far, I think.

I said this same thing to my husband last night.

[takethiswaltz]

I told my boyfriend a few nights ago that we could have an awesome, week-long vacation in San Francisco with the money I'm spending on the application process (we've been too broke to get out of the city for a few years). Argh. I hope this isn't a huge waste...

[0000000000AAA]

Anyone wanna put some money down? I've been betting against myself getting in anywhere. My thinking is that I'll at least be able to reimburse myself for the thousand+ dollars I spent on very expensive rejection emails.

[cquin]

Oh man, this thread speaks to me tonight. I was so proud of my SOP but now it just seems like crap. Plan B for me is joining the French Foreign Legion.