AtlasFox

So after I got my rejection from USC at 4 AM yesterday, I woke up today with a phone call from Rhode Island. I've been accepted to URI with a TAship, and I admire several of the faculty members there. I saw on the results page someone else was accepted this morning, too, so if anybody wants to compare notes or share thoughts about the program and other offers, please reach out to me! I have a feeling I'm going to be torn between my current options. 
I'm honestly just happy to have the win right now. Having eight rejections was starting to weigh on me. 

I pledge allegiance
To the Susans*
Of the Princeton University English department
And to the novel
For which it stands ...
*Wolfson and Stewart obvs
---
Okay I'll stop now. My heart is being pulled in 10,000 directions and beating very fast because I wasn't expecting anything over the weekend but ... I just ... got in ... to Princeton.
I know it's obnoxious but I'm posting 1. For posterity, so people know this can happen 2. Because my entire family asked me repeatedly over Christmas "What will you do if you get rejected from everywhere?" and I was so terrified because I'd worked so hard night and day on apps I didn't have an answer. And while I was feverishly working on them an awful ex-boyfriend asked to "swing by and wish me luck" a few days before the deadline and walked into my living room to say "You know you're really not smart, right? You try to make it seem like you are but you just never ... produce much of anything" About that, luv. About that.
I felt like a loser for two years after a particularly shitty time during my masters, and I've struggled with having zero self confidence even longer than that. I have had embarrassing failures that made a huge dent in my ability to move forward. This? It can happen. Admissions is a wildly unfair process and I think more than anything I've just been incredibly incredibly lucky, but I lurked on these boards on and off for years thinking, "I'm too stupid, I'm a loser, this will never happen for me." For anyone who remotely fits that description reading this now or in future just please know that it can.

Finally cracked and sent an email to the graduate coordinator at UPenn asking if there was any update on when decisions will be released. Will report back if I hear from them!

No worries, and thank you! I've also been rejected from 6 with 3 more implied rejections. I came to terms with the fact that I may only get accepted into one place, and I'm perfectly fine with that because all it takes is one really! I love that attitude, and I've told myself something similar as well. All you can really do is hope for everything to work out for the best.  
 
EDIT: I was not aware of the stuff mentioned by @merry night wanderer! Definitely something to take into consideration. I don't want to misleadingly get your hopes up due to my lack of familiarity with USC's process! 

Definitely! I applied to the English PhD program, and this was honestly one of the schools I didn't expect to get accepted to but I ended up being pleasantly surprised??? But I was hoping to end up at a UC school because of a summer program I did, and everything worked out perfectly.

@AtlasFox - I'm in the same boat, and for the sake of your heart, I wouldn't bank on it. Sometimes notifications come in waves, and this is a program for 3 per genre we're talking about, some of which were notified weeks ago. They do have a waitlist, but I'm sure they don't need a big one. I honestly considered this the longest shot of every school I applied to (and I suspect I don't fit the ivy applicant profile at all).
The people I know who have gotten in are ridiculously accomplished, as in, one has a book deal, is working on his second book, and just got an NEA accomplished. I don't know if that helps or hurts, but remember that Creative Writing is an even crazier lottery than literature, and the CW Ph.D is isn't at all necessary to succeed there. 
@spikeseagulls - The good news is, Irvine has a fantastic MFA, right? You'll have a wonderful community of writers right where you're moving. 

All of this post is Very Very Good. 
I keep writing and deleting, but I'll leave these two linked thoughts: In my limited experience (being a young person without a large social circle), it appears that women experience an even higher pressure than men to, essentially, dump the partner and pursue the career. This strikes me as reactionary--a response to centuries of women being told never to start a career and that the highest goal to attain is a husband. Sometimes the right answer is to prioritize something that isn't career or "dream" job, whether that's partner or family or work-life balance or any manner of other things.
I left Big City to move to Small City when my partner got a job near there, and it felt somehow antifeminist to follow them, even though I was working a temp job as a receptionist in Big City and had no job prospects beyond that after dozens and dozens of applications. I got a much better job here than I could have in Big City. It was a leap of faith, but it worked out. Would I have been as happy if it didn't? Perhaps it always was going to work out, one way or another. 
This isn't an advice post, but another datapoint. 

I couldn't help myself: I emailed Oregon, Buffalo, and Brown about my application status. Their deadlines were all mid-December, so it's been over 8 weeks. I'm holding off on emailing any program with a January deadline for now, as well as any without a GC acceptance posted.

By them do you mean one of the schools, or like ... cc everyone on an email? (Omg the thought of that makes me sweat. It's like being in a polyamorous relationship and having to sit down all your girlfriends and be like, 'Ladies, you're all very pretty, my little harem of universities, mothers of my heart.' Obnoxious in the extreme.)

My first cycle I got shut out by 19 schools and next rejected by 15, so I know rejections like the back of my hand. Anyone wanting to talk about rejections (the prospect of them, etc.) feel free to reach out (to wallow, encouraged, to brace for it, to prepare, etc.). Getting shut out is really tough but it’s not the end (I am not suggesting any of you will get shut out, I just remember what it feels like to have nothing while people are getting accepted left and right).

Perhaps I'm misinterpreting, so apologies if so, but calm down, dude. Her sharing specific details about herself and her application are not really going to help you with yours, and her doing so would not really be "paying it forward" as you so put it. 
 
I feel like there's more to say, but as I may be misinterpreting it, I'll leave it at that.

Speaking as someone in their second quarter at Chicago, I can say that I would have been happier at another program if it meant my partner could come. This is to say nothing about the program at Chicago. It's great. But once you're here and settled, it all becomes normalized and you realize that great people and programs are everywhere. A committed, supportive partner is less common. 
Edit because ambiguity: My partner was able to come with me, and it has made everything much easier. 

So I literally stumbled upon this quote today as I'm doing reading for my master's thesis, but Mari Ruti writes in The Ethics of Opting Out, "The task of theory is to reinvent the world rather than to merely describe its existing—impoverished—forms, there is, for me, a difference between theorizing that provides alternatives to lives as they are currently lived and theorizing that sounds like futile talk about visions that are entirely untenable as real-life options" (151).
To answer some of your questions, I took a critical theory class as an undergrad, and a few of my upper level literature classes incorporated theoretical readings alongside literary ones. I enjoy certain theories over others, my preferences being queer, feminist, and critical race theory, and I think that's because, like Mari Ruti, I like to think about theory in terms of how it can help people socially, how theory can and should have practical value. 

So I literally stumbled upon this quote today as I'm doing reading for my master's thesis, but Mari Ruti writes in The Ethics of Opting Out, "The task of theory is to reinvent the world rather than to merely describe its existing—impoverished—forms, there is, for me, a difference between theorizing that provides alternatives to lives as they are currently lived and theorizing that sounds like futile talk about visions that are entirely untenable as real-life options" (151).
To answer some of your questions, I took a critical theory class as an undergrad, and a few of my upper level literature classes incorporated theoretical readings alongside literary ones. I enjoy certain theories over others, my preferences being queer, feminist, and critical race theory, and I think that's because, like Mari Ruti, I like to think about theory in terms of how it can help people socially, how theory can and should have practical value. 

Can I take a moment to address all the applicants who have little to no self-esteem? I’m talking about those people whose recommenders, family, and/or friends believe in them more than they believe in themselves. Have some faith (if not in your work, then in your tenacity and strength for choosing to apply). Don’t give up before you’ve tried, self-sabotage is only going to make you feel worse in the long run. Much like I said in my personal statement, even if I don’t get in anywhere, at least I can say I was brave enough to try. Believe me, I’m terrified, but I’ll be way more upset later if I don’t choose to chase my dreams when the opportunity is in front of me.
That being said, if you aren’t ready in some vital way (financial, health, etc.) then it’s okay to wait. What I mean by the above statement is: Don’t let your self-esteem bully you out of applying.
End rant. I hope someone is helped by this, I know I needed to hear it today as I’m super nervous and upset.

Yeah, I just checked again too and mine are still MIA. I guess they are just going to taunt us until they get around to them.
YES. My anxiety is already through the roof in spite of the fact that we likely won't start hearing back from anywhere until almost February, for the proactive schools. 

Just came here to say that I am finally done with my PhD applications. I ended up applying to 12, and as much as I'm relieved to be done with those, I'm more anxious about waiting now. I'm forcing myself to not obsessively check my application materials. 
I still have to apply to four more MFA programs on my list, though. 
Anyone else feeling like winter break isn't going to be long enough? But at the same time, feeling like it's dragging on while checking on application portals?

Ascertaining identities is, indeed, a difficult and complex task. Luckily there has been quite a lot written on the subject from many perspectives, with Michael Omi being one good example. However, the fact that this step is difficult does not mean that the whole process should be thrown out.
I am going to respond to the rest of your points here and call it a day on this thread, since this response shows a clear fracture in how we perceive reality. As the climate "debate" has shown, there is nothing to be done when we fundamentally disagree on what something is, as it inhibits any discussion of what can be done. To reiterate one last time: identity is always an issue, has always been an issue. Marginalized identities have been, and are, discriminated against in hiring practices, including in academia. The concept of diversity hires (leaving aside methodology for a second) is meant to counteract this discrimination. You interpret this as discrimination. This is why privilege has been sounded: to interpret measured for equity as discrimination necessitates a view of the status quo (with its discrimination) as normative.
I reject your premise that Jewishness and whiteness are inherently a binary - yes, Jews have historically been considered non-white but reducing the complexity of identity to white and non-white is precisely what true adherence to the ideals of diversity would sway you against. Similarly, why do you assume how anyone here would interpret this hypothetical man's identity? Either way, you're assuming that this candidate would be rejected because of his perceived whiteness, despite having no evidence that this is how hiring committees function (your argument is based on the lack of transparency, to which you then impose malicious intentions, even though most identification practices are based on self-identification). As has been said MULTIPLE times, you have decided that candidates are being turned away because of their identity - that identity is the determinant factor - rather than the possibility that it is one of many factors. Similarly, you assume that diversity is a simple presence/absence (because, as many of your arguments have shown, you operate on an assumption of whiteness vs. non-whiteness), rather than it is a complex spectrum, wherein one department might value your straight Jewish man to be offering more diversity to their faculty than someone else who you feel it is easier to label as non-white.
Really? Because I have never heard of a hiring (or admissions) committee providing a breakdown of why one candidate was selected over another. You realize that this is GradCafe right? Where half of the posts are about attempting to decipher the nebulous nature of such committees, which are apparently open now.
 
Yes, when you display a mentality derived from privilege and I identify it as such I am being reductive, yet you refer to everyone as having a leftist ideological bend and that is... true? Your implication that "we have come a long way," as if we have achieved equality, is patently untrue and mimics gaslighting so well I can smell the propane. Again I recommend Derrick Bell Jr.'s "Racial Realism."
Lastly, again, no one is presuming that they are able to define and judge identity. They're just not giving up on diversity as a result. But hey, since this clearly does not work, how would you suggest we achieve better diversity in our institutions?

Good luck to everyone tomorrow!

So glad to have found this thread - thought I'd stop lurking and say hello!
A bit about me: I'm heading into the fourth year of my BA (which seems to make me a bit of a minority as a PhD applicant?) I'm a Modernist, sort of, mostly interested in queerness across the first half of the twentieth century (predominantly in Britain and the US) and in the legacy of 20th-century liberal humanism in relation to contemporary turns in queer theory. I'm earning my undergrad at an enormous and not at all prestigious public school (a regional campus of a reasonably well-regarded state institution) and am, as far as I'm aware, the only student in my department who's applying for PhD programs. My profs have been very supportive, but I worry about lacking a sufficient support system for this process and missing out on things I really ought to know, so this site is a godsend! I also worry that my school's non-prestigious status will weigh heavily against me in applying to top 20 programs (though I did do a year of my undergrad as a visiting student at Oxford, which I'm hoping will counterbalance that a little bit.) Just took my first full GRE practice test today and scored 165V and 146Q, which a little worse than I was hoping (obviously the math score is absolutely abysmal and I've heard very mixed things about whether that matters.) Scored 740 on the practice version of the Subject Test, so I'm hoping that's a good omen, but hardly anyone seems to require it anymore...
Anyway, greetings to all, and I would be enormously appreciative of any insights or advice from others who are currently undergoing or have recently undergone this process!

Hey all~
So I privately messaged Izzie with some personalized feedback for this document, but I wanted to give a few tips for anyone who might read it later. These tips are loosely based on what I saw in this draft, and I only offer them here to provide other people with constructive criticism that they might can apply to their own SOP. These tips are mostly local writing tips rather than global level stuff. 
Make sure if you use contractions that you're wanting to maintain an informal tone in your document. If you are wanting a formal tone, do not use contractions. I've heard of both formal and informal tones being successful in SOPs, so just consciously be aware of what you're doing and why. Avoid vague and repetitive statements if possible. This is easier said than done, because it's not always easy to identify these characteristics in our own writing. Having multiple readers look over it can help you catch these statements. Completely personal preference for this tip, but rhetorical questions annoy the heck out of me. Avoid them. Please. Ask a question only if it's a research question or if you genuinely mean it as a question.  Utilize active voice whenever possible. Some sentences require a passive voice for concision or clarity, but usually it can be made active.  Avoid value judgments like "extraordinary" or "wonderful." Try to keep it factual or objective. You have a limited word count, and value judgments usually don't have room in this type of document. I was informed not to end a SOP too abruptly. Make sure to thank the committee for their time/consideration/etc.  Hope this helps!

Hey all~
So I privately messaged Izzie with some personalized feedback for this document, but I wanted to give a few tips for anyone who might read it later. These tips are loosely based on what I saw in this draft, and I only offer them here to provide other people with constructive criticism that they might can apply to their own SOP. These tips are mostly local writing tips rather than global level stuff. 
Make sure if you use contractions that you're wanting to maintain an informal tone in your document. If you are wanting a formal tone, do not use contractions. I've heard of both formal and informal tones being successful in SOPs, so just consciously be aware of what you're doing and why. Avoid vague and repetitive statements if possible. This is easier said than done, because it's not always easy to identify these characteristics in our own writing. Having multiple readers look over it can help you catch these statements. Completely personal preference for this tip, but rhetorical questions annoy the heck out of me. Avoid them. Please. Ask a question only if it's a research question or if you genuinely mean it as a question.  Utilize active voice whenever possible. Some sentences require a passive voice for concision or clarity, but usually it can be made active.  Avoid value judgments like "extraordinary" or "wonderful." Try to keep it factual or objective. You have a limited word count, and value judgments usually don't have room in this type of document. I was informed not to end a SOP too abruptly. Make sure to thank the committee for their time/consideration/etc.  Hope this helps!

I second what WildeThing said, and you will more than likely be labeling yourself as 20th and 21st century Americanist.
But I'd also like to add that, when you're researching professors, if you find any that get close to your interests, look at where they got their degrees, and then look at that program's current graduate students. That might help you gauge whether or not a program is supporting the type of work you're wanting to do. 
In my research, I came across Dr. Angel Daniel Matos (https://literature.sdsu.edu/people/bios/matos.html), who works explicitly with Queer YA; however, the program he's teaching at only offers an MA, it looks like. It might be beneficial, though, to look at the University of Notre Dame, since that's where he received his PhD. 
The page I linked also has a link to his academia.edu account, where he's posted PDFs of his syllabi (which look amazing to me, honestly). 
I hope this helps you! I think you and I have similar interests.

Hey all -- current UT Austin PhD candidate writing, to say that if you have any questions about UT's program vis-a-vis your interests, feel free to PM me! Happy to answer questions about the department and program as a whole.

Hi, everyone! First I want to say that I'm really excited that I found this community! 
A little about me: I'm earning my MA in English currently, at the same university where I earned my BA. I wasn't sure if grad school was what I wanted to do as an undergrad, and I really didn't have the stats or experience to apply straight to PhD programs after I graduated. I'm currently working on my thesis now, and overall I feel a lot more confident in applying to larger universities. 
That said, I'm mainly looking at applying to Literature PhD programs, but I've picked up interest in creative writing after taking a few workshops... so I might be throwing in a few MFA programs or dual literature & creative writing PhDs into the mix. I'll be applying to 10+ programs total, probably closer to 15. 
My research interests mostly center around queer theory and affect theory, and I'd like to focus on 20th and 21st century LGBT literature and film. I've read most people tend to label themselves as strictly interested in British or American literature for simplicity's sake, and I guess I'm wondering if there's a better way for me to identify myself in my statements of purpose, as I'm really interested in a transatlantic approach to queer literature. 
Anyways, I look forward to hearing how everyone else handles this complicated mess! I'm hoping being on here will help me lose my imposter syndrome feelings haha.