Shellacked again...

[FreakyFoucault]

Got an e-mail from AcademicJobsOnline.Org, which Duke uses to process English writing samples. My bleary, morning-encrusted eyes -- combined with the feverish excitement of having received a possibly relevant message from a school -- refused to read the note, so I proceeded directly to the Duke portal. 

Checked it, and .......

No update.

Shellacked! 

~also~

Got a call shortly thereafter from a number whose area code services one of the schools to which I applied. 

Answered it, and ....... 

Robot offered to refinance my student loans.

Shellacked again! 

Anybody else getting shellacked on the reg out there?? 

 

(Credit where credit's due: I stole this title from a thread over at physicsgre.com, which had some serious jokers in '08 and '09). 

[JustPoesieAlong]

I'm not even getting false alarms! And, really, this obsession is becoming a problem. I was having a perfectly interesting conversation with my co-workers, but halfway into it I started having legit anxiety that I wasn't near my phone or computer. Hoping for news from OSU this week sometime. 

[FreakyFoucault]

2 minutes ago, JustPoesieAlong said:

I started having legit anxiety that I wasn't near my phone or computer.

Self-shellacked! 

[unicornsarereal]

Self-shellacking every ten minutes today.

[WildeThing]

 Nothing of the sort so far. The closest was that a few days after submitting my Cambridge app I check the portal and it said ‘Under review by degree committee’. Now, normally Cambridge processes apps by having the department weigh in first, they then select applicants they want to offer and move them to 5e degree committee who then confirm whether the department acted accordingly and decide on thenoffer type. This is then sent to the central office which contacts the students. You can imagine my excitement when my app had apparently blazed through the first phase! It would appear that this is standard practice in English, and means nothing either way.

[FreakyFoucault]

4 minutes ago, WildeThing said:

You can imagine my excitement when my app had apparently blazed through the first phase! It would appear that this is standard practice in English, and means nothing either way.

Bureaucratically shellacked! 

[mk-8]

I had a missed call from when I was teaching this morning. I thought hey maybe this might be a school! (With nothing to lead me to believe such) it was my dad who wanted to talk football (we’re Eagles fans). Sweet phone call, but I got my hopes up for the .5 seconds when I saw “missed call” and then my dad’s number. 

[FreakyFoucault]

18 minutes ago, mk-8 said:

Sweet phone call, but I got my hopes up for the .5 seconds when I saw “missed call” and then my dad’s number. 

Dad-shellacked! 

Also, @mk-8, how’re you feeling about the Super Bowl? Eagles looked pretty good last night (Poor Vikings)!

[a_sort_of_fractious_angel]

40 minutes ago, mk-8 said:

I had a missed call from when I was teaching this morning. I thought hey maybe this might be a school! (With nothing to lead me to believe such) it was my dad who wanted to talk football (we’re Eagles fans). Sweet phone call, but I got my hopes up for the .5 seconds when I saw “missed call” and then my dad’s number. 

I've been getting a call a day from an unknown number neighbor over the past 5 days - I'm losing my mind every time the "buzz buzz" starts.

Also, @mk-8 - HELLO, FELLOW IGGLES FAN! I had no idea!

I don't know about you, but I'm totally using the next 13 days to live in anxiety re: the Superbowl instead of applications, which is really just doubling up my anxiety but - whatever. 

[khigh]

I'm hoping last night's game isn't the start of a bad week.  Vikings lost, there's a blizzard going on and I'm at work, and I only applied to Minnesota. This could very well be a horrible week for me.

[LeeLeeCzechIrish]

It doesn't help that I have a .edu email account from a school I applied to (I work in one of their museums) so previously benign email notifications are tormenting me. 

Email shellack?

[mk-8]

1 hour ago, FreakyFoucault said:

Dad-shellacked! 

Also, @mk-8, how’re you feeling about the Super Bowl? Eagles looked pretty good last night (Poor Vikings)!

After last nights game, I'm feeling much better. It was the best we've looked in a long time, and damn Foles just couldn't be stopped. I'm pretty excited; I had predicted the Vikings to win the Super Bowl, so I'm just jazzed about beating them.

 

39 minutes ago, a_sort_of_fractious_angel said:

I've been getting a call a day from an unknown number neighbor over the past 5 days - I'm losing my mind every time the "buzz buzz" starts.

Also, @mk-8 - HELLO, FELLOW IGGLES FAN! I had no idea!

I don't know about you, but I'm totally using the next 13 days to live in anxiety re: the Superbowl instead of applications, which is really just doubling up my anxiety but - whatever. 

YUP! I was so pumped about football yesterday that I didn't think about admissions at all. I'll just focus on that for now.... Funnily enough, my roommate is a Patriots fan. She told me she wouldn't mind if they lost, though, because she's so used to winning 

[FreakyFoucault]

1 hour ago, LeeLeeCzechIrish said:

Email shellack?

The most nefarious kind!

[Ufffdaaa]

I've basically fallen into a self deprecating hole. So, self-shellacked! Cue impostor syndrome! Then, I try to be positive and tell myself "If you get rejected from all of the schools, you get to stay in Southern California where it's 70 degrees and sunny in January." After that, I'm not even sure if I'd want to move for a PhD and I fall into another self deprecating hole to make me feel better about wanting to stay where I am. It's an uncomfortable cycle. 

[unicornsarereal]

10 minutes ago, Wooshkuh said:

I've basically fallen into a self deprecating hole. So, self-shellacked! Cue impostor syndrome! Then, I try to be positive and tell myself "If you get rejected from all of the schools, you get to stay in Southern California where it's 70 degrees and sunny in January." After that, I'm not even sure if I'd want to move for a PhD and I fall into another self deprecating hole to make me feel better about wanting to stay where I am. It's an uncomfortable cycle. 

Yeah this is something I've been wanting to ask people about: for those who've reapplied, how do you steel yourself against the hardship of it? For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

 

I'm a first timer for PhDs and not sure I could handle the rejection and reapplication.

[punctilious]

2 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

Yeah this is something I've been wanting to ask people about: for those who've reapplied, how do you steel yourself against the hardship of it? For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

 

I'm a first timer for PhDs and not sure I could handle the rejection and reapplication.

I've asked my husband about this. He actually applied to UK/Ireland MAs last cycle and was accepted to Cambridge, Trinity College Dublin, and the University of Edinburgh. But since there was no funding, we couldn't swing it. So this is his first time applying to PhDs (and first time applying to US schools). He's not sure he'd reapply because it's so much time, effort, money, and he'd have to bother his professors for a third year in a row to write letters. But it would be really devastating if he were shut out, as this is his dream (as I'm sure it is for all of you).

[Ufffdaaa]

3 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

If I get rejected from every school, I think I'll take it as a sign and stay in my current teaching position/location. 

[a_sort_of_fractious_angel]

12 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

Yeah this is something I've been wanting to ask people about: for those who've reapplied, how do you steel yourself against the hardship of it? For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

 

I'm a first timer for PhDs and not sure I could handle the rejection and reapplication.

This is my third time applying. First time was as an undergrad - got an MA offer. Second time was as an MA - I was the only person in my cohort who applied to PhDs and was totally shut out.

What helped me come back was a year off. I don't adore working in the non-ac world but it has given me a way to craft an identity that has nothing to do with academia. In turn, that identity distance helped me return to my application materials and figure out what seemed to be working and what seemed off without sinking into the hole of "my academic identity is the sole measure of my self worth" (I'd been living quite comfortably in that hole as an MA.)

I also made sure to work with advisors who were really supportive - this season is the first time I've felt like I've been driving the car the whole time. I hope it makes for a better application but if it doesn't - I really can say I gave it everything (which I never felt I had done in previous application seasons.)

Feel free to PM me if you want to chat about the ups and downs of it all. 

Also, apologies for any typos as I'm on mobile and autocorrect is annoying. 

Edited January 22, 2018 by a_sort_of_fractious_angel

[FreakyFoucault]

19 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

I'm not sure, at this point. Sixteen rejections would be tough to stomach, but the worst part would be deciding whether to quit my current shitty job. I've got an unhealthy amount of student debt, so I have to stay employed. But my job is soul-deadening; I really don't think I could stay here much longer. I also haven't given much thought about what I'd like to do in the private sector if academia doesn't work out. Yeah, yeah, I know it's irresponsible, but I'm in my early twenties, so this is to be expected.

Perhaps I'll join the dark side and work on a political campaign. I think the swamp could use a well-meaning dingus like me. In fact, this is probably not the worst time to become politically involved, if ya know what I mean. 

Also, @a_sort_of_fractious_angel, I'm really pulling for you. Of course, I don't know you at all, but I do know that you deserve a spot at a great school. So again, I'm hoping for the best.

Edited January 22, 2018 by FreakyFoucault

[punctilious]

9 minutes ago, FreakyFoucault said:

Perhaps I'll join the dark side and work on a political campaign. I think the swamp could use a well-meaning dingus like me. In fact, this is probably not the worst time to become politically involved, if ya know what I mean. 

Come to the swamp, it’s such fun here! Never a dull moment. 

[a_sort_of_fractious_angel]

5 minutes ago, FreakyFoucault said:

I'm not sure, at this point. Sixteen rejections would be tough to stomach, but the worst part would be deciding whether to quit my current shitty job. I've got an unhealthy amount of student debt, so I have to stay employed. But my job is soul-deadening; I really don't think I could stay here much longer. I also haven't given much thought about what I'd like to do in the private sector if academia doesn't work out. Yeah, yeah, I know it's irresponsible, but I'm in my early twenties, so this is to be expected.

Perhaps I'll join the dark side and work on a political campaign. I think the swamp could use a well-meaning dingus like me. In fact, this is probably not the worst time to become politically involved, if ya know what I mean. 

Also, @a_sort_of_fractious_angel, I'm really pulling for you. Of course, I don't know you at all, but I do know that you deserve a spot at a great school. So again, I'm hoping for the best.

Thanks @FreakyFoucault? I'm pulling for you, too. Moreover, if Foles can go to the Superbowl, there's no saying you and I can't pull an acceptance out of the air.

And forget not friends the date - it's January 22. If 3 app seasons have shown me anything of worth, it's that we've got 2-3 months of excitement ahead. There are many doors open for us (and a lot of windows we can scramble through, too) so hold tight. 

[FreakyFoucault]

3 minutes ago, punctilious said:

Come to the swamp, it’s such fun here! Never a dull moment.

I've always thought about it! You know I studied Poli Sci, so maybe it's just a matter of time!

[WildeThing]

26 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

Yeah this is something I've been wanting to ask people about: for those who've reapplied, how do you steel yourself against the hardship of it? For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

 

I'm a first timer for PhDs and not sure I could handle the rejection and reapplication.

So, 18 rejections would be tough. My alternative is to apply for a PhD in my homd country (where I'm guaranteed entry but there is no funding) and find some kind of job (in a country with 25% unemployment). I might reapply to a handful of programs next year but I doubt it because: a. it's another year down the drain and I neef to start earning money, b. 18 apps was expensive, I have a wedding to pay for in the summer and paying for another round without a guaranteed source of income is tough and c. it might mean that there is no interest in my proposed idea and I'm not sure how I would handle that as I've been passionate about it for years now.

[clinamen]

27 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

for those who've reapplied, how do you steel yourself against the hardship of it?

It is my second time applying for P.hD. programs. My first time was when I was finishing the last year of my MA and I was shut out. I put absolutely all of my effort into those application materials, so it was certainly soul-crushing to receive ten rejections. I reapplied this year and it was never a question of whether or not I would try again. I have sort of a P.hD-or-bust mentality--I'm super dedicated and I just keep telling myself that it will work out because it has to work out. I don't know that I can stomach another year of categorical rejection though, so I am desperately hoping I get good news this season.

I would love to hear some success stories from anyone who has been in a similar situation! 

[la_mod]

36 minutes ago, unicornsarereal said:

Yeah this is something I've been wanting to ask people about: for those who've reapplied, how do you steel yourself against the hardship of it? For first timers, if you get shut out will you apply again?

 

I'm a first timer for PhDs and not sure I could handle the rejection and reapplication.

I applied to 7 PhDs last year and one MA (I was finishing my BA) and got totally shut out. Not going to lie, it was the most acutely depressing few months of my life, but there was never an option of whether I would reapply. Now I've expanded my pool a bit. I think in some regards it's easier this time -- I know that I'll live and be okay and figure it out (I've had a very nice "gap year" thus far working PT as a nanny and at my uni as a research assistant) but harder in the sense that I know exactly how awful rejection feels and exactly how hard it will be to get over it. 

5 minutes ago, clinamen said:

It is my second time applying for P.hD. programs. My first time was when I was finishing the last year of my MA and I was shut out. I put absolutely all of my effort into those application materials, so it was certainly soul-crushing to receive ten rejections. I reapplied this year and it was never a question of whether or not I would try again. I have sort of a P.hD-or-bust mentality--I'm super dedicated and I just keep telling myself that it will work out because it has to work out. I don't know that I can stomach another year of categorical rejection though, so I am desperately hoping I get good news this season.

I would love to hear some success stories from anyone who has been in a similar situation! 

This is how I feel too! I studied for hours upon hours for the subject test and did poorly, and then had a rough go at writing all of my materials. Rejection suuuuucks but I think having that mentality is good? although I sometimes wonder if it's unrealistic and if I should start developing a plan B.