Sad State of Affairs

[GRAPEFRUITS]

Why do some people continue to post on this forum, for what in some cases seems to be years, after the grad admission process? Do they not access to other graduate students / advisors to talk to in real life about their graduate school issues? It just seems a bit pathetic to me.

[mirandaw]

For support and a sense of community. Why do some posts smack of judgment and condescension?

[psychgurl]

ha, GRAPEFRUITS: I can always count on you to start sh*t on the forums. Actually, just seeing your username cues me in that drama will soon follow! well done!

[GRAPEFRUITS]

For support and a sense of community. Why do some posts smack of judgment and condescension?

because they are full of judgement and condenscention.

This is the worst possible place to try and look for support or community. The 'advice' floating around on here is usually absolutely horrific. Really, I question the intelligence of those that stick around and pity the people coming here with nowhere else to turn for answers to their questions. 99% of what is posted on here are unresearched opinions, conjecture and speculation. Bad.

ha, GRAPEFRUITS: I can always count on you to start sh*t on the forums. Actually, just seeing your username cues me in that drama will soon follow! well done!

That's funny, because I'm pretty sure I was only substantially (if you could even call it that) involved in one thread, which was dramatic and pathetic from the start, so, not only is your sample size woefully small, your hypothesis and conclusions are both totally crap too.

Edited April 20, 2012 by GRAPEFRUITS

[psychgurl]

so wait....why are you still on the forum if you think it's so pointless? And even if you've only had 11 posts, they're mostly just pointing out how pathetic everyone is or making fun of what people say. It seems pathetic that you'd waste your time here if you think the advice is so bad.

[3point14]

This is the worst possible place to try and look for support or community. The 'advice' floating around on here is usually absolutely horrific. Really, I question the intelligence of those that stick around and pity the people coming here with nowhere else to turn for answers to their questions. 99% of what is posted on here are unresearched opinions, conjecture and speculation. Bad.

Then leave?

[ktel]

I don't think anyone comes on here expecting anything other than opinions and conjectures. That's what forums are all about. I personally never even used this forum during the grad application process, and I find it helpful as I don't have any close relationships with other graduate students in my department, nor do I see my advisor very often.

[GRAPEFRUITS]

so wait....why are you still on the forum if you think it's so pointless? And even if you've only had 11 posts, they're mostly just pointing out how pathetic everyone is or making fun of what people say. It seems pathetic that you'd waste your time here if you think the advice is so bad.

I finished the rest of the internet early. Also, I find it flattering that I have made such an impression on you.

Then leave?

oh my god, why didn't I thin... oh, I did. I was asking this question to see if you all realize how pointless and unhelpful this site is. Really, I got into like, a bajillion top-tier programs and I'm going to my dream school and I didn't get one useful tip from lurking here all season, not one.

[Sparrowing]

I actually find it strange that so much of this forum is dedicated to the application and decision-making process. But maybe I'm missing the point.

Sometimes it's nice to have interactions with grad students that don't impact internal departmental rankings. (Nobody told me about this system until the END of my MA, and I'm sort of glad they didn't. I wish I could remain equally ignorant for the PhD.) Relative anonymity can be a good thing.

Edited April 20, 2012 by Sparrowing

[emmm]

Really, I got into like, a bajillion top-tier programs and I'm going to my dream school and I didn't get one useful tip from lurking here all season, not one.

They are welcome to you -- I hope they don't regret their decision to take you.

[triplebogey]

Folks like to hang out with other people experiencing similar situations in life, even if only on the Internet. A lot of times the grad experience is rather confusing and it's nice to have a place to turn to where you can more or less blend into the crowd without anything personal at stake. Plus it's good entertainment, a great place to hear about books, movies, foods, etc. that other people might like.

I suppose the short answer is the same as for any other online forum. In this specific case, this board doesn't just exist for the admissions process, so folks can stay on and hang out.

The only thing that seems pathetic to me is the need for anyone to start a thread about how pathetic other people are for choosing a course the OP may not choose for him or herself. And don't say you were genuinely curious, because nobody is going to respond well to "can you all tell me why you're so silly and hang around here?"

[CarlieE]

I finished the rest of the internet early.

I'm putting this one on a t-shirt.

[Andsowego]

I finished the rest of the internet early. Also, I find it flattering that I have made such an impression on you.

oh my god, why didn't I thin... oh, I did. I was asking this question to see if you all realize how pointless and unhelpful this site is. Really, I got into like, a bajillion top-tier programs and I'm going to my dream school and I didn't get one useful tip from lurking here all season, not one.

You're heading to your dream school this fall? At the Master's level? Meaning, you haven't actually started grad school yet? Or am I misreading that? If that's the case, maybe you should revisit this forum after you've actually experienced your first year of grad school with all its complexities. You might view this forum differently. I know I did.

[TeaGirl]

Actually, this forum has been really helpful to me personally, especially when it comes to managing expectations regarding admissions, getting emotional support throughout the waiting process, and figuring out that it's not the end of the world to have to apply again (just as a few examples). People I know in the real world are not going through the same things, and wouldn't be able to understand much.

I've already completed my Master's a couple of years ago and view this forum differently. It's just a nice place to waste a little time, empty your head of day to day stress, occasionally find a gem of a thread (sadly not this one) and just relate to random anonymous people going through similar stuff. It's called socializing, albeit a little anonymously and on the internet.

[GRAPEFRUITS]

You're heading to your dream school this fall? At the Master's level? Meaning, you haven't actually started grad school yet? Or am I misreading that? If that's the case, maybe you should revisit this forum after you've actually experienced your first year of grad school with all its complexities. You might view this forum differently. I know I did.

Ph.D., and I plan on having *real-life* friends, thanks.

[mirandaw]

Ph.D., and I plan on having *real-life* friends, thanks.

You "plan on having" real life friends, which implies you currently have none.

Not entirely surprised.

[ANDS!]

You "plan on having" real life friends, which implies you currently have none.

Not entirely surprised.

GRAPEFRUIT I hope you keep setting them up, because some of these zingers are knocking you out of the park. . .

Anywho I remember my early 20's - young, full of an infinite storage of knowledge, underappreciated for my talents and took great joy in trolling the Internets ("My how clever I am with this Goatse").

[GRAPEFRUITS]

You "plan on having" real life friends, which implies you currently have none.

Not entirely surprised.

No, my statement implies that I currently know no one at the school which I will be attending, unless, of course, you're projecting something about yourself onto what I said.

Anywho I remember my early 20's

Nope.

[Dal PhDer]

..although "I finished the rest of the internet early." is CLASSIC! ...got a good chuckle out of me!

Edited May 1, 2012 by Dal PhDer

[antecedent]

Really, I got into like, a bajillion top-tier programs and I'm going to my dream school and I didn't get one useful tip from lurking here all season, not one.

Ahahaha this is the part that made me laugh. Sure you did, Grapefruits, that's really nice of you to share with us too.

[Andsowego]

Ph.D., and I plan on having *real-life* friends, thanks.

Where did I say that you have no "real life" friends? I'm not sure why you used my post to springboard into that defense. Anyway, I'm happy to know that you're going to be in a PhD program. I'm also a PhD student (one of those pathetic people still hanging around this forum... lol). I too have a ton of "real life" friends, and this forum isn't about avoiding real life. Sometimes it's about trying to lend thoughtful, anecdotal advice to those who are new, from those who aren't. Not all mentorship can be easily categorized or empirically measured. In fact, the best kind can't. Good luck with all those real life friends you intend to make. I have a feeling you're going to need it.

[GRAPEFRUITS]

Ahahaha this is the part that made me laugh. Sure you did, Grapefruits, that's really nice of you to share with us too.

You don't like my assertion that the advice given here is bad (overall) and that it's a bad idea to take advice from a forum of random strangers where you have no idea of their credentials, and so therefore I totally didn't get in anywhere this application season and I'm a dirty liar.

Ok. I'm sorry things didn't work out for you, good luck next year, and maybe try relying on people worth relying on in the future?

Where did I say that you have no "real life" friends? I'm not sure why you used my post to springboard into that defense. Anyway, I'm happy to know that you're going to be in a PhD program. I'm also a PhD student (one of those pathetic people still hanging around this forum... lol). I too have a ton of "real life" friends, and this forum isn't about avoiding real life. Sometimes it's about trying to lend thoughtful, anecdotal advice to those who are new, from those who aren't. Not all mentorship can be easily categorized or empirically measured. In fact, the best kind can't. Good luck with all those real life friends you intend to make. I have a feeling you're going to need it.

Defensive, me? I don't think so, just clearing up the willful misinterpretation of my comment, which was meant to offend and totally didn't. But thank you kindly for assuring me that you do in fact have friends, as if anyone cares.

Again, your last two sentences are meant to offend, but they do not. Good day to you sir.

[antecedent]

You don't like my assertion that the advice given here is bad (overall) and that it's a bad idea to take advice from a forum of random strangers where you have no idea of their credentials, and so therefore I totally didn't get in anywhere this application season and I'm a dirty liar.

Ok. I'm sorry things didn't work out for you, good luck next year, and maybe try relying on people worth relying on in the future?

Haha well, I'd be less concerned about trolling gradcafe and more concerned about my reading comprehension if I were you.

[GRAPEFRUITS]

Haha well, I'd be less concerned about trolling gradcafe and more concerned about my reading comprehension if I were you.

The phrase "Sure you did," implied you think I am not being truthful regarding how many schools admitted me. So yeah, I'm pretty sure I comprehend, but thank you for the concern.

[antecedent]

The phrase "Sure you did," implied you think I am not being truthful regarding how many schools admitted me. So yeah, I'm pretty sure I comprehend, but thank you for the concern.

Last time I checked, "bajillion" wasn't a real number, so you'll have to excuse my skepticism.

And thank you for your good wishes, I am very excited about starting my masters in the fall