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Posted

I am done with all of my applications as of 12/13. The last few months have been the perfect sh*t storm with a lot of personal, family, and school related problems, not to mention health and anxiety problems for the first time in my life.

I am also feeling the void that comes with having nothing to do other than waiting. But I plan on using this time to completely detach and wind down. I've been doing way too much lately and it's time to just be. This is the perfect time to practice letting go of everything that causes thoughts about what may or may not happen. We did what we had to do, and we did the best we could. Now there's nothing more to be done. So, just let go.

Posted

Ok, now I'm worried that it's all going to get worse once I finish the applications.

Don't worry, it will. I did apps last year and the majority of January and February were absolute torture. I found myself pulling my phone out every 5 minutes to look for that notification. I could barely sleep some nights. I got to the point that people would look at me and ask "Are you going to be ok?" because I looked like some kind of tortured soul. Not cute at all.

Posted

I feel like I'm dying too. At this rate I think I'll go nuts before any notifications come in. And I see on the results page that people are getting notified now!? -- not for english though

Posted

Got my apps submitted last month, I felt relieved. This relief was replaced by constant dread. One of my recommenders has habitually refrained from submitting the LoR until right before the app deadline. In one case, missing the deadline by a day. All nine apps finally done, with all LoRs, as of today. Relief again... no, wait. That's not relief. There's no relief. Not even a shread. And the more threads I read here, both the less and more stressed I become. At least we're all in this together! This is my first post; long time lurker, had to finally break down and share on this thread. Thanks for sharing everyone.

Posted

Awwww... I've changed the settings on my phone to give me reminders for every email I receive instead of consolidating it every hour. Sigh....

I also still have recommenders that haven't submitted....and the deadlines have past...weeks ago. :(

Oh well...

Posted

Since submitting 1 month ago, all I can think about is whether I'll be in or not.

"If I get in here, will I get funding? Well.. maybe I can see what some of the CVs of current Ph.D. candidates in that program look like to compare against. Wow, all of these people went to Caltech or MIT for undergrad, had a 4.0, and had 5 first author publications by the time they got accepted. Shit, I'm not getting in anywhere. Might as well start training to be a plumber."

Then, 20 minutes later,

"I think I'll read this guide on graduate school applications for the 80th time, EVEN THOUGH I ALREADY SUBMITTED ALL OF MINE. Wow, this says that letters of rec are the most important part. Mine all went to top 5 schools and say I was the best student they've ever had. I'm getting in everywhere!"

Rinse and repeat. It's a roller coaster, and it's not going to stop for the next couple of months. Like most of you, family, friends, and girlfriend think I am going insane. I'm not arguing with them either :)

Posted

aaannndddd I just saw that someone got an interview with buffalo for english. I is finished. totally and utterly finished.

Posted

I enjoyed the weekend break from neurotic email checking. Oh well, back to it.

I've heard that a few programs interview in January. I would assume they have to notify soon to allow for buying flights and all?

Posted

I enjoyed the weekend break from neurotic email checking. Oh well, back to it.

I've heard that a few programs interview in January. I would assume they have to notify soon to allow for buying flights and all?

eh if you're an international student you can't fly over just for an interview?! :unsure:

Posted

I just want to say that this waiting is gonna be my end. I'm gonna be mentally dead even before I get to grad school. That is to say if I get in at all....GAHH

Posted

I desperately just want to enjoy the holidays, but two of my programs are known to send out invites by Christmas. I received one of the invites, but am anxious for the other. Once that is out of the way, I can just relax, since the rest of them will be sent out after the new year.

Posted

Oh no mccamel, I think that in my own psychological state, I would have had very choice words for that telemarketer. I would've told them to take me off the list and if they knew what was good for them, they would inform as many people as they know not to disturb me until April 16th!

Posted

Just received a phone call from a mysterious number... my heart rate shot up and I jumped up and nearly ran outside with my cell... ... HEALTH INSURANCE TELEMARKETING :(

They obviously know you applied to grad school and therefore are a target for their company due to higher likelihood of cardiac arrest, stroke, or death by anxiety and negative thinking.

Posted

They obviously know you applied to grad school and therefore are a target for their company due to higher likelihood of cardiac arrest, stroke, or death by anxiety and negative thinking.

Thanks for the much needed and appreciated laugh!

Posted

Just received a phone call from a mysterious number... my heart rate shot up and I jumped up and nearly ran outside with my cell... ... HEALTH INSURANCE TELEMARKETING :(

I feel you. This happened to me today with a dentist, just a secretary giving me my 6 month reminder...

Posted

One thing that this waiting period does create is a sense of solidarity. As stressful as the next couple of months are going to be, the knowledge that you are involved in the process along with so many other people is comforting. At the very least you know that you're not in this alone, and that there are so many people who know exactly what you are going through and are going through the same thing.

Posted (edited)

Agreed gnmcclur. People in my life are sympathetic, but they really have no idea the stress we are under.

 

I have started to hate those emails that I am getting more frequently that say, "you're application is currently being reviewed, a decision will be made.....". Ok thanks, but just do it, don't tell me about it. The anxiety of seeing an unopened email message from a school is ridiculous.

Edited by ion_exchanger
Posted
Agreed gnmcclur. People in my life are sympathetic, but they really have no idea the stress we are under.

 

I have started to hate those emails that I am getting more frequently that say, "you're application is currently being reviewed, a decision will be made.....". Ok thanks, but just do it, don't tell me about it. The anxiety of seeing an unopened email message from a school is ridiculous.

 

Yes.  I had a school send me a snail-mail letter in a heavy envelope, so I thought it was something important.  Turns out it was just a letter saying they were reviewing my application and a magnet.

Posted
Yes.  I had a school send me a snail-mail letter in a heavy envelope, so I thought it was something important.  Turns out it was just a letter saying they were reviewing my application and a magnet.

 

That's just cruel and unusual.

Posted

Looks like there have already been some acceptances and interviews in this thread! CONGRATS!!!! Let's hope the good luck continues for all of us!

Posted (edited)
Yes.  I had a school send me a snail-mail letter in a heavy envelope, so I thought it was something important.  Turns out it was just a letter saying they were reviewing my application and a magnet.

ETA: That is just mean.

I don't know why my original post isn't working. Sigh.

Edited by DaisyAdair
Posted

I'm fine most days, but once every week or so, I'll have a hyper-realistic dream about getting into one of my schools and wake up feeling like a million bucks, only to realize it wasn't reality. O, cruel fate, why taunt me with these dreams.

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