MinaminoTeku

Haha glad to see people are in open relationships too in academia. I am polyamorous so I have three committed partners all over the place and they all have accepted that I will be busy with grad school so if time between us is limited, they understand why. Then again, I wouldnt suggest open relationships as a way of making it work between people in long-distance relationships. It takes a certain kind of person to be able to handle all of it and just some people aren't up for it. I'm also not a fan of the don't ask, don't tell policy in relationships. My partner and his partner tried to have that and it just did not work out well (she was also monogamous too so it was rocky to begin with).

I sit and stare awkwardly at the students to make sure they don't cheat. Then after I get bored of that, I am on my phone or reading something. I let them have their stuff close by to them but I can see it from where I am sitting. I typically teach smaller classes though so it is easy for me to see everyone. I don't like pacing up and down the aisles. It makes me nervous when someone is looking over my shoulder so I don't like doing it to other people. The only time I remind students of the remaining time is if there are one or two of them left and it is getting relatively close to the end of class. But those students are typically those who already did the test and are just going over the answers. I have never had a student run out of time while taking an exam.

FIRST - You as an applicant 1. What did you study in undergrad? Master's (if applicable)? Communication Studies for both undergrad and master's 2. What were your grades like in undergrad? Master's? Undergrad - it balanced out to a 3.14 GPA (Haha of course I would remember it because it is pi!). As for my master's, Bs all around but that was because we had to. Anything lower than a solid B was considered not passing (so B- was not passing). I walked away Cum Laude. 3. What are your research interests? Sexual communication, specifically alternative sexual relationships (like polyamory), identities (not gay/lesbian), and behaviors (like BDSM) 4. What teaching experience did you have before applying? I had a total of five years prior to applying. Semester in undergrad, two years in master's program as a TA, two years in ESL, and semester as an adjunct 5. What about research experience? I wrote a master's thesis for my exit strategy at my university. I also had to do some qualitative and quantitative research in my classes, but also some independent study research (program assessment study) that was eventually presented at a couple conferences. My thesis was also presented at ICA. 6. What about miscellaneous experience (unrelated to Comm/corporate/private/etc)? I have ESL experience. I taught English in Japan for two years. 7. How old are you (or, what is your age group)? Just turned 28. SECOND - Deciding to pursue a Ph.D. 1. What made you decide to pursue a Ph.D. in Communication? I like research and my dream is to become a professor so naturally, the next step is to get a PhD. I also want people to call me "doctor". 2. Did you contact faculty at the programs you were interested in? What did you say? How often did you communicate with these people (POIs)? I did. I met them at conferences and told them that I was interested in applying to their school. They said "do it!" 3. Did you visit or contact graduate students? How did thaaaat go? That was mostly who I talked to, honestly. I wanted to know the culture and environment of the school before applying. It went super well. Everyone was really friendly and encouraged me to apply to the program and talked up how awesome it was 4. How did you decide who to ask for letters of rec? Were they all professors or did you get letters from outside of academia? They were all professors at my alma mater. I worked closely with them to the point where they are the type of people that if I need a letter of rec, they can make one for me easily. So it was a no-brainer in asking for letters. But to be more specific, one professor is my mentor, one was the chair of my committee for my thesis and the chair of the department, and the other was the professor I created a sexual communication class with. THIRD - Actually applying 1. How did you look for programs? Honestly, NCA did it for me. I knew I wanted to apply to one program because I wanted to work with a professor there and the work that was being produced was in my area of interest. But it was the grad fair at NCA that did it. I just went around, talked to everyone who had Interpersonal Comm in their departments, and then chose from there. 2. How did you decide where to apply? See above. 3. What was your biggest priority in a program? Getting the freedom to do the research that I wanted to do. My biggest nightmare was going to a place and being forced to do research based on whatever the school wanted or the professors wanted. Seeing as how the stuff I want to look into may be new or unpopular, going to a program that supported my research was important 4. How many schools did you initially set out to apply to, and how many did you actually apply to? Six initially, applied to four. 5. What were your GRE scores like (either specifics or vaguely)? How many times did you take it? Did you feel good about your scores? 148 in verbal, 146 in quantitative, and a 5/6 on the writing portion. I took it once and I did not feel good about my scores. They were actually the reason why one school flat out didnt look at my application. 6. How did you frame your experience/interests/fit in your statement of purpose? Did you focus on something more heavily than other stuff (like faculty or experience)? I focused on two things: my international experience in Japan and my course creation in my master's program. I thought they were the most interesting pieces to me. 7. Did you feel good about your applications? Why or why not? I felt good about a couple of them and not so much the other two. I didnt feel good about one because it is highly competitive and I am no where near as awesome as I could have been (truth be told, lazy in master's). The other was because of my GRE scores. 8. If you knew then what you knew now, what advice would you give yourself? Study harder for the GRE and get at least a 150 on both sections. FOURTH - GETTING IN (OR NOT) - feel free to update/answer later 1. How many programs did you get into (and which, if you don't mind sharing)? 2; ASU and Milwaukee 2. How many were you waitlisted for? Did you make it off the waitlist? I was not waitlisted for any 3. How many were you rejected from? 2; UCSB and UConn 4. Did you get into your top program? Did you expect to get in? I did and yeah, I expected to get in. 5. Did you receive funding? Later on, I did. But not initially for my top program. For the second program, I did receive funding. 6. Once you've made your decision...how did you decide which school to attend? The funding. I wanted to go to ASU but didnt receive the funding so I was holding out until people dropped so I could get their funding. Sure enough, enough people dropped and I was offered funding. So it took it! 7. If you didn't get admitted to a program, will you apply again? Yeah, probably. Or I would have escaped back to Japan for another year and reapply from there. 8. What do you want to do with your Ph.D.? Become a sexual communication professor! FINALLY 1. In retrospect...what was the best part of the application process? Can't really say there was a best part about it aside from it being over. 2. What was the worst? The waiting for funding. Money talks a big game. 3. What advice do you have for future applicants? Don't worry about having less experience than other people. It's all a matter of how you spin it in your personal statement. But also know that the applications arent cheap...

Archery clubs? What do you shoot? No joke, that was something I took into consideration for my schools. Neither one of them have an archery club, sadly, but that doesn't mean I can't bring my equipment and find a range somewhere. But also to answer your question, as tough as it was, I learned a lot about myself through my grad school experience. I learned what I can and cannot handle, what I would do in moments of high stress, and who my true friends are.

Packing my stuff, renting a truck, and driving to my state. Road trip! I have some savings to use for furnishings (if need be) and first few month's rent until the money kicks in. Hiring cheap labor (aka my friends) to help me move my stuff.

I'm feeling emotionally excited to be starting a new chapter in my life. Not really worried so much about the workload as I am about surviving on my own in terms of money. I just hope the amount I make will be enough to live somewhat comfortably off of. I just want to be done working right now so I can focus all my time on my research and seeing people before I take off.

One day, I will succeed! I have many story ideas that I want to turn into novels someday.

Tempe anyone?

Hooray! I have made my decision and while I am still feeling a bit of the blues in rejecting the other school, I am happy with my decision. ASU, here I come!

Things to have/things I plan on buying myself when I leave this year: - High powered computer that will survive the grad school years (invest in a good machine so you don't have to worry about it during school. Because nothing would suck more than your computer crapping out on you midway through your journey) - Laptop for on-the-go work (I wouldn't go with a tablet as they are limited in their ability to perform, but it also depends on what you need it for and how you study. I found that tablets that double as entertainment devices are distracting more than they are helpful, but that's because I have no self-control) - Business cards (you will be giving out a lot of them) - A decent home printer (for when you can't get to the office and print stuff out for free) - Desk with drawers for office supplies (for staying organized. Plus I have a slight fetish for office supplies kek kek) - Destressing stuff (video games, sports equipment, art supplies, whatever it is you need to destress)

Haha I got a great story. Well, kinda great but more entertaining. So strap in! I was a master's student finishing up my thesis. I was aiming to have it done by mid-April so I could graduate in the spring. At the same time, I applied for a program to teach English in Japan and I was also waiting on that decision in April. The program would ship me out to Japan in July, meaning I had to have it finished by spring so I have some buffer time to prepare for Japan (May-most of July to prep). Did that actually happen? Ha! Nope. Here's what went down: So I got waitlisted to go to Japan on April 1st, which means that it wasn't a guarantee for me to go to Japan. I was like "okay, cool. That kinda sucks but that also means I can slack a little on my thesis and finish it during the summer deadline in August." I was work work working hard on my thesis during spring, stressing out so much, so it was nice to have a few more months to work on it. But I still wanted to go to Japan, so I submitted my acceptance to be on the waitlist before April 30th (which was their deadline). The mid-April spring thesis deadline came and went and I was stress-free from that. I was just frantically checking my email to see if anything about Japan changed but in terms of thesis, I took some time off and it was niiiiiice. Then May 8th happened. I get an email saying "congratulations! You've been upgraded to go to Japan! Hooray!" And I'm like "great! Awesome! I am going to Japan in July, this is amazing. This is new and exciting! Another dream come true!" But then it hit me. SHIT! I NEED TO FINISH MY THESIS! Boy was that the most stressful month of my life. When I say that you can write a master's thesis in a month, I'm not kidding. Interviews, transcriptions, coding, and writing in 30 days. It's possible but man did it almost kill me. A jar of peanut butter and a spoon was my breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the majority of those 30 days. But needless to say, I finished the final draft to be submitted for what may have been more stressful than the actual writing itself...the defense. The defense itself wasn't stressful. I've seen these people a billion times and we are buds. but it's scheduling a time and date for them to all be together. Getting a committee to sit together for a couple hours at the same time is like herding cats. I kept sending different dates, working with their schedule, and finding out when people can meet (granted it was the summer so I understood they had plans but still! It's only two hours!). One of my committee members, love him to death. He is my mentor, he is my academic rock, he is someone I inspire to be. But for fuck's sake did he not want to go to the campus for a day if it meant putting on pants. I understand the need to relax but bro...bro...do me a solid here. But we ultimately found a date and time to meet. I defended on a Monday and the final thesis was due to the proofreader by that Friday. Meaning I had a week to make all the edits necessary (there weren't that many, thankfully!). I got it into the proofreader by Friday, they sent me the finished copy, I printed it out and send it to be bound the following week. Then for two weeks, I packed up all my stuff, said my goodbyes, and went to Japan for two years. Hope that was entertaining! I have another story about the time I could not find original sources and I drove around the entire city to find it and parking and closed libraries and sobbing in my car and just throwing my hands up and being like "of course this would happen. Of-fucking-course this is my life". Hmm yeah that's about the gist of that story xD Hope it was entertaining too!

All of them! All the publications! I'm in the process of chatting with my advisor about turning my thesis into my first published work. But ideally...oh man, the sky's the limit really but at least 3-4 by the time I graduate. Is that a low number? I don't even know what is average for people to graduate with.

I have done both scheduling time to write and just writing whenever I please. Scheduling time helps you stay on deadlines but it also causes the most stress. Writing whenever you want lessens that stress but the deadlines creep up on you and you are left scrambling for it. So I try to find a happy medium. I have taken part in NaNoRiMo (unsuccessfully but still tried) and Shut Up and Write Tuesdays. My friends and I just made our own time to write that we called Whimsical Writing Wednesday where we just sit together and write and ask for advice or someone to read stuff for us. The problem with a group is that is falls under the group dynamic of socializing first, then work later so be careful with writing as a group. Pick people who are serious and won't derail the session. If you need to be a hard-ass, be a hard-ass. One strategy I do is just to write something everyday. Even if it is just a page or a paragraph, at least it is something. Work on the outline, edit a chapter, anything that is progress. But do it every single day. And just from personal experience, if you are on a roll with writing, don't stop. Keep that going and you'll end up producing so much. While it may be unhealthy sometimes (I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I spent writing my thesis because I was on a roll), I don't regret any moment of it. It got my shit done in the time that I needed it. Also, I haven't tried it yet but I might soon is a software called Zenwriter (maybe someone can attest to it and tell me what they think about it). It is supposed to be a distraction-free software where it is just you and the document and that's it. But I can't speak from personal experience on it, just tossing out its existence.

Multiple colored highlighters and pens was my coding for my thesis. Good to know that software actually exists to do it for me xD

I am close to officially accepting my position at ASU! Funny enough, one of my fellow CSUF graduates decided to go somewhere else so the funding that she got ended up going to me. I was apparently that close in the list. Much excite!