rising_star

Funding (during the academic year and during the summer), teaching opportunities (if you think you might want to teach later), stats training, placement (departmental and specifically for whomever might be your advisor), fit with the people in the department (not necessarily your cohort but the people there who you might see in classes or work with on a project). Outside of the department, I'd think about potential external committee members, library/research resources, location, ability to pursue hobbies you have (I train a martial art so I looked for available places to do that), cost of flights to friends/family, and weather.
If you're planning to do a dissertation which will require external funding to conduct research, I'd also pay close attention to the track record of your advisor and your department of getting those in a timely fashion. For example, if you want to do international data collection and no one in the department has gotten a major external grant for research in the last 3-4 years, I'd be wary.

Funding (during the academic year and during the summer), teaching opportunities (if you think you might want to teach later), stats training, placement (departmental and specifically for whomever might be your advisor), fit with the people in the department (not necessarily your cohort but the people there who you might see in classes or work with on a project). Outside of the department, I'd think about potential external committee members, library/research resources, location, ability to pursue hobbies you have (I train a martial art so I looked for available places to do that), cost of flights to friends/family, and weather.
If you're planning to do a dissertation which will require external funding to conduct research, I'd also pay close attention to the track record of your advisor and your department of getting those in a timely fashion. For example, if you want to do international data collection and no one in the department has gotten a major external grant for research in the last 3-4 years, I'd be wary.

This is abusive and utterly inappropriate behavior. Sadly, though, to protect yourself, you need to be very careful about what you do, depending on your graduation and post-graduation plans. Some questions to get you started:
Is there someone else who can act as your advisor instead of your current advisor? I ask, because it's entirely possible, if not likely, that if you complain he will know who the source was and that he won't appreciate it and will retaliate. You may be able to graduate without his support if there's an official complaint against him, but you also need to consider your post-PhD plans. If you want to stay in academia, it'll be hard not to has a letter from him. Your life will be easier in a variety of ways if you can switch to someone who is both not abusive and whose support you can count on. I would personally choose to do this even if it meant changing directions of research somewhat (within reason).  Is there a history of similar complaints being taken seriously? Or conversely of students leaving him and switching advisor? Do you expect to have your department's support? You may not immediately know. If he is famous and/or tenured, it'll be much harder. You'll leave in a few years and he may stay for decades, and politics may dictate that they'll prefer to keep the calm by sacrificing you.  Are there external resources to support you? An ombudsperson? Mental health services or a support group? The Title IX office? Regardless of anything else, you should seek this kind of support, because what's happening is not okay and no one should deal with it alone.  It's sad that these are the questions you have to ask yourself, but this is the reality. I am certainly not advocating for continuing to take the abuse, certainly not as a default. But you need to consider what fighting back would mean, and what prices you're willing to pay. Make informed decisions, whatever they are. I would also urge you to consider that there are other wonderful people in your field, and that you shouldn't choose to quit just because of one person, if you otherwise want to stay in your field! Good luck to you -- I hope you can find your way through this and it all works out! 

Hahaha, so true, Sigaba. Again, out of upvotes otherwise I would've put one on your post. 
 
And yes, you get a stable income for 5-6 years. But, you're assuming that you would really be unable to find a job that pays you a cumulative... $90K in 6 years. To be quite honest, you would make at least that, if not more (because eventually you'd be promoted into management), if you started working at Wendy's for minimum wage right now. When I think about the lost income of grad school, I think about what my peers were doing when I was 3-4 years in and how much they were making. Most of my friends, even after adjusting for cost-of-living, were making somewhere between 2 and 15 times what I was making back then. A friend of mine got a job working in a brewery (making beer) and made more money than me each year that I was in grad school easily (plus, he got free beer from work!). Did I get to do things in grad school that otherwise I wouldn't have gotten to do? Absolutely, yes. But, there were costs to that, financially and otherwise. 
 
It's great to have a stable income for 5-6 years. But, to return to my earlier Wendy's example, 5-6 years there and you'd potentially be moving into management. After 5-6 years of a PhD, you may then go look for that same job you could've gotten before you started. If you end up un(der)employed for a year or two, will the degree still be worth it? Will you be able to go back to living on $7.5K after having $15-20K for 5-6 years? Are you really okay with carving out a living making $1500-3000 a course? These are decisions that seem far off now but, will be in front of you before you know it. 
 
If you want a real reality check, read the Chronicle and VersatilePhD forums where people talk about the difficulties of securing a position. On the Chronicle forums, you'll get the academic market difficulties. On VersatilePhD, you'll read about the job market struggles of those trying to get out of academia, even those with the kinds of additional/alternative experience I suggested to lazaria already. Both of those reality checks are useful because, to be quite honest, I'm sick of people acting like it's so easy to take your PhD and find another decently-paying line of work. The market sucks. Having a PhD doesn't mean you can get a job doing anything. You're a strong writer? Great but so are hundreds of other people, some of whom will have more recent work experience or internships to make them marketable. Or, they won't have a PhD, so they're more likely to get hired for an entry-level gig under the presumption that they won't leave and that they're willing to start at a lower salary. Is that harsh? Yes, but it's also true. 
 
As Sigaba pointed out, you can go in with your eyes wide open and still be a bit shellshocked by the market when you go on it. You'll think that you did all the right things (publish, get grants, network at conferences, develop a sexy subfield that is trendy) and still get 100s of rejections. It's like being the last kid picked in kickball in school except that no one actually ever takes the last kid, you just stand around on the side trying to show them that you do have skills while they ignore you or laugh in your face.

It all depends on how fast of a notetaker you are. Notetaking while someone is talking is a skill you've got to learn at some point in your career so, might as well start to learn now! Practice when you're in class or in meetings. For me, I'm able to write without really looking at the paper, which means I can make eye contact with someone while jotting things down. If not, write down the most important parts. 

It all depends on how fast of a notetaker you are. Notetaking while someone is talking is a skill you've got to learn at some point in your career so, might as well start to learn now! Practice when you're in class or in meetings. For me, I'm able to write without really looking at the paper, which means I can make eye contact with someone while jotting things down. If not, write down the most important parts. 

I use my Kindle when traveling to read for pleasure. It's awesome.
The only thing I'd add is that I keep a prepacked, 1 quart bag of toiletries on hand at all times so I literally just have to throw that into the suitcase and I know that the toiletries is taken care of in the TSA-approved way. It's made my life way easier. 

If it's so important, why did he falsify the scholarship letter?

Hi all!  I've spent the last two years traveling monthly for work, and spent the first year forgetting at least one essential item.  I created a super generic packing list.  Most of these items are pretty obvious, but I know especially in high anxiety situations, I'm more likely to overlook things.  Anyway, thought I would share the list I've been using for interviews in case someone else would find it useful!

Electronics: 
- Laptop
- Laptop Charger
- Headphones 
- Cell phone charger

Clothing: 
- Suit 
- Blouse
- Back up interview outfit
- X outfits for X days away
- Pajamas (Especially if you're staying with grad students or sharing a room!) 
- Undergarments 
- Socks 
- Professional shoes 

Basics: 
- Toothbrush 
- Toothpaste 
- Floss 
- Deodorant 
- Makeup bag 

Travel Size Versions of:
- Shampoo
- Facewash 
- Moisturizer
- Lotion

In my purse: 
- Wallet
- Passport 
- Driver's License
- Emergency Cash
- Travel Binder including Plane/Train Ticket Printed, Hotel information, Itinerary
- Padfolio with Resume/CV, recent abstracts of POIs work (as well as notepad for list of questions to ask at interview, write notes about program, etc.)
- Lint roller 
- Tide Pen 
- Nail File/Polish 
- Granola Bar 
The last step is remembering to grab my suitcase on the way to the airport!

1) The undergrad needs to learn to be more proactive. This isn't entirely on you, IMO.
2) I would try to schedule regular (weekly, biweekly, or at least monthly) check-ins with your advisor where you can go over some of the same things you did during office hours. Or ask if they'd prefer if you made an appointment during office hours.
3) In the future, you may want to do check-ins every 15-20 minutes by asking "Am I taking up too much of your time right now?" or "Would it be better if I made an appointment so we can discuss X some other time?"

I would wait until the end of that day or early the next day, in case you think of anything you could've answered better, would like to expand on, or have additional questions about.

Start with the major academic associations in your field (American, British, and European) and go from there. Both the US and the UK have sociological associations, for example. Join their email list (which often doesn't require joining the association) and keep an eye out for opportunities. Similarly, there may be topic-area specific ones (e.g., one for folks who study apples, one for folks who study oranges, etc.). I can't tell you exactly where to find them because I don't know what you study*. Good luck!
*And, to be honest, even if I did know, I probably would still tell you to find this info on your own as it's an important part of discovering your discipline and topic area. Because my work is interdisciplinary, I'm on probably 10 academic email lists.

I am sorry you are feeling this way. 
I grew up with a single stay-at-home mother and I have four younger siblings. My father is still around, but has always had two jobs to support us. My parents were never able to pay for my postsecondary studies - even if they both wanted to - it was just impossible for them to do it. So I made my way through my program with small and prestigious scholarships, student loans and part-time work.
I kinda understand where you're coming from.
I remember in my class in high school, I was in a program in which I was the only kid whose parents were not living in a "house" and other students pointed that out to me. My family and I were living in an appartement. And it just never occured to me before that I was living in an appartement while all of my classmates had a house. But it made me realize that I was scared to invite my friends to my place because I was afraid that they'd judge me or something or I was afraid that there wouldn't be enough room at my place to welcome them.
I co-organized a trip of two days, fully subsidized, a few months ago with two university colleagues. We had to organize hotel rooms as part of this project. And one day, we were talking, just the three of us, saying that some students were complaining about the quality of the hotel while other students were satisfied with what it because they just never had the opportunity to sleep in a hotel in the past. I also recall in my undergraduate program, I had a class colleague who was doing sex work to make ends meet. Most of her family was deceased so she literally had no support (and I find her to be incredibly resilient as well and would say it to her many times.)  And I remember listening another girl who just said in an informal class conversation "My father just put 20 000$ in my bank account this morning". And you could tell that she wasn't bragging or anything like that, it was just normal for her and had always been part of her reality.
I think it's just really hard for people to envision a reality they have never really experienced. It's not because people are bad intentionned or mean-spirited, I think it's just a blind spot that most of us have because we don't hang out most of the time with people that are different from us or have different life paths. And because we have preconcied ideas on a lot of people who experience different realities than ours. I feel the same way about racism for instance, whenever I have to explain it to someone who does not experience it on a daily basis. At this point, I think it's just a matter of being attentive and having empathy for others. Sometimes, it's also a matter of lack of life experience and of maturity which is not something that people can always be blamed for. I give the benefit of the doubt in most cases. I really do think that it's more a better of "blind spot".
At the same time, I want to add that you may not know what their finances might really look like. They might be struggling too or found other strategies to do the things they are doing. You never know. Just because they appear to be more comfortable financially also does not mean that they can't be good friends. I think you should give these people a chance. I think we live in a "free country" where everyone is free to do whatever they want as long as it doesn't harm anyone else. They have the right to do whatever they want with their money too.
 
 

Some opportunities may not require a full research plan, just FYI. That's more common when a professor already has funding (e.g., ESRC funding) and is seeking a RA to work on that project. If you aren't already, subscribe to the major disciplinary email lists in your field as that's where many such announcements are made.

My partner and I aren't exactly alike by any means. A better description would be that we're opposites who in many ways complement one another. That works really well for us. 
Also, my sister met her partner when they were volunteering for the same cause. My mom met her partner when they were both volunteering for the same political campaign. There's definitely something to be said for volunteering as a way to meet likeminded people, whether that's for friendship or something more.

I'm not sure that the school would catch on to it since it's a post-bacc, but if they do, you probably will be automatically eliminated due to the intentional omission. I have six undergraduate schools and one I did poorly at. My undergrad advisor suggested leaving out the worst school, thinking that schools wouldn't notice it since I had so many schools. Every school I applied to saw the omission - sometimes it was the admissions office and sometimes the department - and I got rejected. One school even called me a "highly competitive" applicant, but that they couldn't admit me because I hadn't submitted all required documents. 
I would suggest proceeding with extreme caution. Make sure you've clearly thought out the pros/cons/potential consequences of not listing it.

1. Speak to your adviser and professors often. 
2. Don't just focus on classes when you get in. In my MA, one of the largest problems with previous students was that they took all their courses and still hadn't started their research (or even knew what they wanted to do). You don't need to know exactly what you're doing your first semester, but you do need to start working on ideas early. 
3. Once you are in the research, analysis, and writing phases make sure to create a schedule and stick to it. This may mean making a daily schedule for yourself or working out a status update schedule with your adviser. Whatever you do, make sure it is a schedule you can and will stick to so you actually make progress even if you don't necessarily need to come into a lab every day. 
4. Actually, make a schedule early for yourself so you know what you should be doing each semester (classes, what you should be working on for research, any conference submissions you need to work on, school paperwork, etc).
5. If the profs let you, use class assignments to work on your research. Plenty of research essays can help form the foundation of your literary analysis and is a structured way to get you started on your research. 
6. Allow yourself a destressing activity. You'll burn yourself out if you don't have an outlet. 
7. When you make your schedule for writing (and also the analysis stage) assume it will take at least twice as long as you think it should. 
8. Summer and Winter breaks are a great time to work on stages of your research without having to worry about classes. Use this time to write rough (or final) drafts of chapters or, if it's early in the project, use this time to write the proposal/IRB/misc drafts so that you can get them to your adviser earlier in the semester or work on reading for your lit review. 
9. Make friends in and out of your cohort. It's great to have people going through the same classes and at the same stage of their career. It's also nice to make friends with students further in the program who can offer advice (and make sure to repay the favor when the new cohorts come in).
10. Because I feel like it should be a solid 10 and it can't be said enough, communicate! Speak to the DGS, your profs, your adviser, the department chair, or whoever is appropriate about your progress and ways to keep yourself on track. 
 
 

To echo @fuzzylogician, I'd urge you to submit your strongest paper regardless of whether you still have the prompt. (Also, have you tried going online to access previous course websites? You may find that you have access to the prompt that way. Alternately, you could always email the professor, explain the situation, and ask if they'll send it to you. I definitely wouldn't have a problem doing that for one of my former students.)

@Visualizer As a woman, I am going to be frank with you: much of what you are saying has predatory overtones. I was an undergrad not that long ago, and if a male graduate student had approached me seeking anything simply because I was an undergrad alarm bells would immediately be going off in my head. More than shared mental development is necessary to make a connection with another person. If you "find that you can really hit it off with people" why target a younger demographic? If you're already doing well socially, why change things? Where there is an age difference of any significance (specifically in non-platonic relationships, which you seem to be seeking) there is frequently a power imbalance that could very easily get you into trouble. Listen to the voices in this forum. Find social stimulation elsewhere. Continue to seek help. Seek better help. And do not, under any circumstances, romantically pursue an undergraduate simply because she is younger. That is so inexplicably creepy.

I have a beginning of the semester survey where I ask students to tell me about themselves, and one of the questions I ask is what they'd like me to call them. Sometimes it's a case like this, sometimes it's a "Thomas" who'd much prefer to be called Tom. 
Along with asking preferred pronouns, it's a space for students to tell me what they would prefer, and then I go by that. 

Anecdotally, I was able to afford ONE application. $300 with the GRE is a lot when you are supporting yourself and a family.  That's a car payment and insurance, 1/3 of my rent, or groceries and gas for the month. I went without sending anyone Christmas presents this past year because Christmas money became GRE/App money. Thankfully, my family understood.

You do realize that many American and Canadian students also struggle to pay for the GRE and to pay application fees, right? If not, you may want to check out some of the literature on poverty in America and/or on low-income college students. It is flat wrong to say "an American or Canadian student doesn't have much of a problem paying for GRE exam in US dollars". There are plenty of posts on this website to the contrary.

Talk to your professors.

Focus on what you're trying to do and go to the best place to do that (assuming that best place also leaves you with the least amount of debt). Don't get distracted by notoriety.

Ummm... this is going to bother/upset some people but, I really don't see it as my job to manage students' mental health. Instead, I point them to the appropriate campus resources and encourage them to take advantage of them. Because I am not trained in mental health care so beyond general statements that almost anyone could find on the internet, I don't have much to offer students.
As far as grades themselves, I generally remind students who are freaking out that X assignment is worth only Y percentage of their course grade. That context can be helpful because it reminds them that they may have failed a particular assignment but that assignment is only worth like 5% of their course grade so they could still, in theory at least, get an A. Oh, and I frequently tell them that grades don't really matter, that you don't need a 4.0 to get into grad/law/med school, and that employers are going to care about things beyond your grades when hiring you. Better to have real experience and interests than anything else so I push them to do internships for credit, get summer jobs, do summer research, etc.