Robin_Sparkles Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 "Why are you freaking out? It's just school. I'm trying to find a JOB. That's really competitive." ...apply for grad school, bub. Let's see if you're able to keep singing that same tune of yours. Grad school? Not competitive? Riiiiiiight. stmwap, comp12, mop and 4 others 7
EdYouKateOr Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 "Why are you freaking out? It's just school. I'm trying to find a JOB. That's really competitive." ...apply for grad school, bub. Let's see if you're able to keep singing that same tune of yours. Grad school? Not competitive? Riiiiiiight. So misguided and misinformed!
ion_exchanger Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 The over-confidence of other people is also really aggravating. I was SO excited when I got my first interview invite the other day, and all my family could say about it was along the lines of "we're not even surprised, why were you so worried?" A little enthusiasm would be nice! THIS!!!!!! I probably jumped about ten feet in the air when I received my first interview invite, and the only thing I kept hearing was "told you so". Um, OK.
Pretty_Penny Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I feel like no one in my family gets this... Which makes sense as my parents never went to college. Today my grandma was visiting and I got a call from School X, which I had to take to talk to them about travel plans for their interview weekend. As I'm thanking them and saying bye my grandma says, "Was that School Y??"... NO GRANDMA IT WAS SCHOOL X, KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN. Hahaha I'm willing to be open with my schools about the other places I'm applying, but I'm hoping the lady didn't hear, as it seems rather rude. But what can I do? My grandma is in her 70s and everyone's main concern is that I'm going to move too far away. comp12 1
Phdoobiedoobiedoo Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 From my uncle in all of the last four conversations I have had with him: When are you going to finish? You know, when I was your age we didn't go to college and look where I am, and you have all this schooling and...(trails off but I still hear the implied "and look where you are you big loser").
BuddingScholar Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I am probably one of the few nutjobs who has a website. That's right... a website! So now I follow [obsessively] my website analytics to figure out where the hits come from and how long they are spending there. I can report that Princeton and Yale have started looking at applications. ssk2 1
DiamondWheelchair Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 This thread make me glad I have only mentioned to a handful of people that I'm applying to grad school.
RubyBright Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 This thread make me glad I have only mentioned to a handful of people that I'm applying to grad school. It's not how many people you tell, it's who you tell. Overall, I received more commiseration and empathy when I wrote on Facebook that I was in the middle of grad madness than when I told my family. The advantages of being friends with academics? Maybe I should have just broke it to my family when/if I was accepted somewhere...
sansao Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 (edited) I love it when people who have never attended college tell me what my motivations are for applying to a specific program. Yes you're right, it's clearly for the weather, certainly not the near perfect research fit or genuine academic interest. I'm sure you applied for your position based on the landscaping outside your office? Ugh. Edited January 18, 2013 by sansao
sansao Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 "Why are you freaking out? It's just school. I'm trying to find a JOB. That's really competitive." Right. Because no one who's applying to grad school has ever had a job. Ever. Ever.
Quigley Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 Most of my mine have been listed, but I also get this a lot: "Oh, well at least when you become a professor you'll be making bank!"
EastCoasting Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 My family's main interest appears to be whether or not I heard anything from the one Ivy that I applied to.
Quigley Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 My family's main interest appears to be whether or not I heard anything from the one Ivy that I applied to. When people ask where I've applied, I generally don't tell them about the two Ivies on my list except for my parents and a couple of close friends. Seemed like a good idea at one point and I just stuck with it.
Allouette Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 When people ask where I've applied, I generally don't tell them about the two Ivies on my list except for my parents and a couple of close friends. Seemed like a good idea at one point and I just stuck with it. I did this at first, but I was tired of people going 'huh, that's... neat' in a really patronizing tone. That or, 'but aren't you applying to any good schools?' or going 'but where else' when I finished my Ivy-free list... So now I just say the Ivies all in a rush at the end and follow it with 'but I'm not really holding out for them obviously'.
The Whistler Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 "When will you have children?" epwatson 1
RubyBright Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 "When will you have children?" Isn't that better? My mother thinks that I can have children DURING my PhD program.
dendy Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 A lot of women manage to have children during graduate school. Some claim it's better than trying to have kids as a new professor. Not that I'd encourage it or anything.
PhDreams Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Isn't that better? My mother thinks that I can have children DURING my PhD program. I have quite a few friends that have had children during their doc program. It can be done! Promise.
practical cat Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 I have quite a few friends that have had children during their doc program. It can be done! Promise.But we don't need to tell your mother that if you don't want them then (or ever) or something. RubyBright and EdYouKateOr 2
RubyBright Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 But we don't need to tell your mother that if you don't want them then (or ever) or something. Just a well-kept Gradcafe secret.
The Whistler Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Isn't that better? My mother thinks that I can have children DURING my PhD program. Oh, I didn't explain the context. My country is pretty traditional when it comes to marriage and kids, so basically, if you don't have a husband and kids, it must mean something's wrong with you. Ergo, any woman who has a family, has it because that's what she wanted, and any woman who pursues a career, does it because she can't get a husband. Not to mention that here, bad marriage > no mariage. Because all couples have problems, and that's life. Which I don't know anything about. Because I'm not married. Therefore, every conversation I have about a PhD with someone who's my mom's age ends up with: "When you're old and alone, you'll see that studying isn't everything." Coincidentially, everyone seems to know someone (most likely imaginary) who regretted not having children when they were younger, because now they're all old, alone, and unhappy. It isn't like this with the younger generations, but the older ones can annoy you just as well. comp12 1
PhDreams Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 But we don't need to tell your mother that if you don't want them then (or ever) or something. I'll take it to the grave. lol
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