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PsyZei

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Everything posted by PsyZei

  1. I will (hopefully) be in my 40s when I finish my PhD (I started college for the first time in my 30s) as well and I'm married with kids at home, also. Like you I am graduating with my masters this May. My spouse does not have a college degree, but he is supportive of my academic and career goals. I would sit down and decide if this is a goal of yours or not. It is of mine, I want to be academic faculty and do research- I need a PhD for that and it's an important enough goal I am willing to invest the time and effort despite being an older, non-traditional student. Something that has been significant is the way we divide up taking care of the kids. I tend to be the primary care-provider in our home for the kids when it comes to things like staying up at night with sick kiddos. On the flip, he tends to be the one to take them to doctors appointments during the day. I tend to be the one that goes to the school events. He tends to be the one that sits down with them to help with homework. Etc... It's not perfect (for example, with the recent colds and flu that came through our town I averaged less than 3 hours sleep a night for over two weeks straight, that was really rough with it coinciding with traveling for a couple PhD interviews), but overall it seems to work out okay for us.
  2. Yes! And my spouse can only transfer to a handful of locations in the Midwest only. It made it very difficult to find programs to apply to that were also a good fit. I am still waiting for financial info, so am not celebrating quite yet, but I was accepted to the program that out of those I applied to is actually (I feel) the best fit for research/client focus for me and is in the heart of his company's territory (as in the corporate office is just two hours away and there are a dozen locations to within an hour of the university- so the chances of him being able to transfer laterally are good). It's sucked a bit, because it meant I couldn't apply to some programs I would have loved to (for example: the professor who literally wrote the book on the integrated therapy style I use invited me to apply to their program as their mentee.... but it's several states away from the nearest location my spouse could transfer to). It is a ton of pressure to try and make it work out, but it's important to us that we do. You are not alone in this!
  3. I do not know for sure, this is what I am getting from my own experiences. I think right now everyone is waiting for the dust to settle and see who actually accepts. Only one of the programs have I talked to who would be my mentor (and that's because they were the one to call and let me know about the acceptance) at all the others it's been an email from the program or similar letting me know about the acceptance and that financial info will follow. I have been assuming that the POIs are likely waiting to reach out any further until they know for sure if I'll be attending their program- which won't happen until I find out the financial info and make a final decision (at which point I will be the one reaching out to let them know). I may be wrong about how this normally works though- this is my second PhD application cycle, but it's my first time with acceptances- so I'm mostly meaning making as a go.
  4. Let me know if you get good news about Iowa- I've heard that the CFT and all the Psych tracks are super collaborative and interact a lot ?
  5. My last admission decision came in the evening. The program had said we'd hear acceptance decisions by end of the week. So when I hadn't heard anything by close of day I assumed I'd been rejected and was like, bummer... Ordered pizza for the family and decided to have a mopey evening. Then boom. I'm beginning to think admissions and application season in general is just chaotic and there are no rules on when stuff could be sent out or decided (or what could be the tipping point for decisions).
  6. I'm so sorry everything is lining up like this. It sounds like you are doing so much, and it is really stressful and a lot. I'm rooting for you!
  7. Once I got accepted at one of my top three schools I declined offers for admission and interviews to other schools that weren't the other two of my top three. This is the basis for the emails I sent: [Dr./Etc...], Thank you so much for your interest in my application and inviting me to [interview for/attend] your program. I regret to inform you that I will not be [interviewing for/attending] your program, but hope to cross paths with the amazing faculty and students at [University/College] in the future. Best regards, [Me]
  8. I would follow up at this point with an email back to ask about details.
  9. My way of viewing it was that it would be ruder to go without any intention of actually considering the school (also, money and time are a thing and traveling is expensive in both money and time). Once I got accepted at one of my top three schools I declined offers for admission and interviews to other schools that weren't the other two of my top three. This is the basis for the emails I sent: [Dr./Etc...], Thank you so much for your interest in my application and inviting me to [interview for/attend] your program. I regret to inform you that I will not be [interviewing for/attending] your program, but hope to cross paths with the amazing faculty and students at [University/College] in the future. Best regards, [Me]
  10. How'd the Oregon interview go?
  11. I was wondering when was a good time-frame to begin house hunting for buying a home? I am in a 2 year master program so we have rented an apartment while where we are now, but since PhD programs last at least a few years we want to look at buying a home this time. I wasn't sure what the normal time frame was for purchasing a home though, so was just looking for advice on when we should start that process.
  12. My understanding is that Forensic Psychology is the APA recognized version of Criminal Psychology (that is not APA recognized), I think forensic psychology in the USA already includes a criminology component? But this isn't my field, I'm just going if what I've heard a friend discussing whose field it is. So maybe for the USA you are just looking first Forensic Psychology programs that have a mentor whose research/focus match or are similar to yours in relation to criminology? I don't know, though, but that's where I would start looking- hopefully someone in the field in the USA will see this and have more answers (so if nothing else this response is just a helpful bump) ?
  13. Nope, not Clinical Psychology. Psychological and Quantitative Foundations, Couple and Family Therapy. Hope you get good news soon!
  14. It was good news, thank you. I feel you on the craziness and hope you get good news soon, too.
  15. At the interview on Monday I was told I would hear from University of Iowa about their acceptance decision at the end of the week, and just got an email about half and hour ago. I would assume in most cases end of week means Friday, but it could always depend on the program, and there could always be reasons that something doesn't get done until the next week.
  16. ACCEPTANCE School: University of Iowa Type: PhD Psychological and Quantitative Foundations, Couple and Family Therapy Date of contact: February 14th, 2020 (interview was February 10th, 2020 on campus) Contact Type: Email of official invitation to the program from the core faculty. Notes: "This is your official invitation to our program. You are welcome to start this fall and your acceptance is not contingent on funding. However, we know funding is an important part. We will not know how much funding we have for another few weeks to a month." I really like this program and am very excited about getting accepted.
  17. "A student should not hold more than two offers for more than one week unless there is specific information (e.g. a visit is scheduled, funding decisions, advisor decisions) they are waiting to receive from the program." So for example I've currently got two offers, but I don't have the final funding info for either of them. Therefore, I am not making a decision between the two until I have that info. What I have done is decline the offers and interviews for programs that I know I won't take over one of the two I currently have regardless of funding information- but I am not going to turn down one of these two until I have the funding information I need to make an informed choice between them.
  18. Personally I haven't, because I feel like it would just come off as being impatient and that's not the view I want them to have of me while they are deciding to admit me or not. Waiting is hard, though.
  19. I feel for you- a month, oomph! I interviewed for my last top three program on Monday, and they said to expect results by the end of the week. It's Friday so... ? The suspense is killer.
  20. It would likely depend on the program and where you applied. PhD will definitely have an emphasis on research, but all MFT/CFT degrees require you log a certain number of therapy hours and supervision hours. You've got a bit until the next application cycle, I would start by checking out AAMFT and schools with programs where you might want to go to see if anything speaks to you- along with any other degree types you might want to pursue. Take this time to narrow down what you really are looking for in a degree and if it's worth it to you. Good luck!
  21. This is a super common misunderstanding when it comes to the field- the whole not treating/looking at single people thing. MFT/CFT is a type of therapy that takes relationships and systemic context into account (there is actually talk I've heard of it being rebranded away from calling it MFT or CFT and just Systemic Therapy- to try and clear up this confusion). Most of my clients are individuals and all of my research participants have been individuals- not couples or families. MFTers are trained to work with individuals, families, couples, and whatever just like any other psychological clinician is- the name is representative of the way we approach context, not of who we work with ?
  22. You might want to look into marriage and family therapy/couple and family therapy PhDs. Relationships, sexuality, families, systemic contexts, etc... is basically our bread and butter ?
  23. I read the response as a bit of a joke or a nod to the realization that they probably did overuse the word- not as an emotional response at all (since drat is not an emotionally charged word or a word with an significant emotional connotation).
  24. Something I didn't think to ask in any of mine, but I would if I could go back, is if the mentor and their students (or the program as a whole) seems to foster/thrive best with a competitive or collaborative spirit. I am extremely not competitive. I like doing well and getting recognition, but I am collaborative by nature and am often uncomfortable when put in a situation or discussed in a way that is competitive in comparison to a cohort-mate or friend. One of the things that my supervisors repeatedly note about my therapy style is how collaborative I am with anyone in the room with me, and it's a running joke in both my family of orientation and procreation how not competitive I am when it comes to sports, games or really anything. I am happy when everyone is doing well, and I want everyone to do well. That said, some people and programs really thrive on competition and there are some amazing programs out there with competitive culture.... and they would not be a good fit for me. I never thought to ask about, though, until a professor brought it up at a group interview at my last one (he was describing the program culture and said something along the lines of if you are someone who knows they thrive and do well when competition is involved this may not be the best fit program for you, as their culture is on the other end of the spectrum towards collaboration). The sense of relief I got hearing that was profound, and I still wonder why I hadn't even thought about it as one of my criteria for programs before- since it is something that I've internalized as part of my identity.
  25. Mine have been anywhere from a month and half to just a couple weeks. I think it depends on the program.
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