caffeinated applicant

I'd like to retract my previous post
truly did not comprehend the level that responses on all levels of US public health were gonna fuck up containment
whoops

I'm thinking very much along the same lines - would rather wait a year than start remotely. Please keep us posted on the outcomes of your conversations with DGSs about this!

Have ... people seen this?
Not English but I just about burst into tears at the prospect !! 
Have decided the last few days that unless programs begin on campus and in person in the fall that I'm deferring -- and am asking the DGS's of all programs whose offers I'm very seriously considering whether they would allow me to defer in that circumstance. It sucks because it's the last conversation in the world I want to be having, I'm ready to start my PhD tomorrow, but ... I've worked from home for a year and know it is really not great for my mental health and the richness of my intellectual life, and the last thing I'd want to do is waste 1/6 funded years that way. 

Waiting for BU’s Rejection Diary: Day 325,100,563
I’m now at a point at which the entire application cycle just feels fake. None of it happened. It was just a dream. I applied to grad school last year? Fake. Notifications still pending? Definitely fake. 

not sure if this affects anyone, but I have just accepted duke english's offer of admission ?

In my attempt to spread humor during this tumultuous time, I finally figured out how to add photos. At long last, here is Coraline (and Charli too!). May they bring a hopeful smile and a reminder that we never had actual control over anything anyway, because cats are our supreme overlords and we exist solely to do their bidding. Grad school wasn't even my idea, it was theirs.

A little bit of good news came to me a few days ago in the midst of all this craziness and uncertainty: I've successfully leveraged one of my offers to increase my stipend at another institution! I got word that the college's dean approved an increase, and I should receive further details this week. I really wasn't expecting them to bite, so this is a very nice surprise! 

Fully agree. There is a stereotypical academic environment that I've had my heart set on since I graduated high school 16 years ago, and the closer I get the more that ideal picture disintegrates. There are very little tenure jobs, many profs adjunct and don't have an office, many teach online, etc. While I understand how privileged I am to be at this point, I'm bummed at the thought of there being an asterisk attached to this next chapter. I hate to pout and throw a first-world tantrum, but I'm over the road being so difficult when it was such a pain in the ass to even get to this point. I am/was really looking forward to being in the classroom and enjoying this for a little while before the reality of the job market hit. 
I know it's fine and I'll enjoy the experience, it's just annoying. 

As an international applicant from a country just about to go through a spike in numbers due to the virus, a non-traditional, 3rd cycle applicant, and recently laid off, I'm really at my wits end about this whole situation. I really hope things work out by fall, otherwise I'm done for?

I can explain Chicago. Stipends have been standardized across the humanities. Every PhD student is now guaranteed a set amount for the duration of their enrollment in the program. This change may prove to be wonderful should we need longer than 6 years to finish our dissertation. By year,I think it amounts to about 500 dollars more a year for me, but a decrease for second years, who had a higher stipend last year). For my cohort, this seems to be a net gain. And it certainly is for students in other departments. Before, from what I understand, other departments had significantly smaller stipends. However, this adjustment came with the caveat that the humanities can only take in a set amount of students per year, so many departments have had to downsize enrollment a ton. This is the scariest bit of it, English seems pretty safe so far. The stipend has seemed to always vary by year, which sucks for my cohort when I consider that last year's had a substantial research grant to buy computers and the like, on top of a higher base amount. But all things considered, I'm living pretty comfortably here, so I haven't felt any immediate outrage. It's unsettling to know that our financial contracts aren't binding on their end, though, but that just seems to be the case for every program. 

You would think! I had two current Chicago 2nd years tell me a couple weeks ago that aspects of their funding package have changed twice since they arrived, neither change benefitting the students and in both cases detrimental to them, and the administration has been very reluctant to explain the reason for the changes (I should have asked specifically what they were but the room was hot and I was two beers in, sry)—so it definitely does happen, even in times of institutional bounty. (Chicago for instance is rolling in dough right now through Mellon grant $$$, so like, why is the administration being obstinate about stuff like that? Not cute). Stipend amounts adjusting for inflation is also not always guaranteed, and funding plummeting past year five can be a question mark even at top 10 programs (my Berkeley stipend goes down by ~7k if not more from year 5 onward, for instance; Harvard's stipend goes down 5k from year 5 (no more summer stipend); have heard a recent Penn grad say there was always anxiety in her cohort about funding in the 6th year (though not sure if that's still the case). I think the fact of 5-6 funding packages are guaranteed, but the devil is in the details...
It's also the case that other than stipend, the funding offered by the department I mentioned (conferences, travel, etc) can absolutely change, at the discretion of either the dept or GSAS more widely; it's not like it's a part of our offer letters. I've heard from students at Brown and Harvard who are having enormous difficulty getting their expenses for conferences that cancelled due to coronavirus reimbursed (not all airlines are offering refunds; many hotels are not, and students have to pay in advance and make applications for reimbursement after the fact—the stickler being that for some universities the conference funds are only released if the conference actually took place! So they're having to take financial hits of anywhere from a few hundred to a couple thousand dollars. Insanity.) 

Same. Got laid off yesterday. I was trying to have some savings for moving with my spouse and starting grad school, but everything is so messed up. Strength to you during this time though. It's really hard to simultaneously be thankful for the good things happening when it's overshadowed by this international disaster and uncertainty for a future you began planning for. 
Can't speak from a place of expertise, but I imagine since the offers are already made to us, they will abide by it as best as they can. This is not to say we won't feel the effects, and funding for the things you listed are indeed important, but we are (*hopefully still*) among the luckier few whose funding packages for the next 5-6 years are still guaranteed. I am worried about the students entering in the upcoming years who will not only be dealing with job scarcity and insane competition for program admission (aka, the usual), but would probably have to worry about the scale and duration of funding. Will we see smaller cohorts with good funding? Or funding for less years? Will they shed parts of the funding package, like health insurance? 
Such an uncertain time. Crazy that this happened in a matter of weeks. 

I mean, having spoken to several DGS's and professors at a few of the programs I'm looking at in the last few days, most of them are not treating a return to in-person, on-campus classes as a likelihood, though it's far from an impossibility. The next two months or so will tell, and I think everyone's preference would be physical classes for so many reasons (everything from 'zoom sucks' to 'residential life is so important to the university community and we were all genuinely heartbroken to have to send students home'). 
I post way too much on these forums lately for my own good, but I'll end with one last big picture ominous thing (and maybe someone much smarter than me can offer opinions and/or reassurance). If the economic impact of the virus on the US economy is as bad or worse than the 2008 crash, then that's bad for . . . well, not just the job market, but also universities as a whole, whose endowments are often comprised of substantial investment. Princeton lost 25% of its endowment in the 2008 crash; Harvard lost 27%, or 8 billion.
Does something like that touch graduate students, or does it amount more or less to mowing the lawns every other week instead of every week? Who knows. It's probably the case that state schools already under pressure (like the UCs) will be the hardest hit by budget cuts. And maybe it's way too early to speculate, possibly counterproductive. But I think it's worth thinking about, as we contemplate devoting ourselves to an institution and making it our home for 5-6 years. The ability to access funding through the department for all kinds of things (travel, conferences, research, emergencies, fellowship opportunities, other projects), to count on funding packages staying the same and properly adjusting each year for inflation . . . all of that is really important and sorta dependent on how well the institution as a whole is doing. Anyway. Something to consider. (Disclaimer: this all comes second to the general economic devastation on so many Americans right now and the inevitable loss of life we'll be seeing, ofc. Compared to that, so much of this seems miniscule. Hoping you all are safe, well or recuperating, and self-isolating.)

Finally heard back from BU re: acquainting admits to the program (they’ll be trying to schedule online or phone chats with faculty). I’m relieved but wary about how that’ll go...
I know it’s been said but I’m just really bummed I couldn’t visit either of the schools. I feel like it’s so important and it makes me very nervous to choose “blindly.”

From what I've heard (not from SDSU in particular, but several other unis), this is an acceptance and the Graduate Division review is just a formality. Congratulations!

I’m glad you posted this. I’m experiencing somewhat similar losses and have no real place to grieve them. I’m at home with my family during this pandemic but, none of them are particularly supportive of my educational pursuits or understand how great a loss I’m at with cancelled conferences, commencement, recognition ceremonies, and more. I’m devastated. And I know it’s all first world problems and it really doesn’t matter if I walk across a stage, but it just... feels so sad and unfinished, for all the reasons so many of you have listed and more. One of the Master’s I’m finishing (I did two concurrently) was in creative writing, and I’ve been working for years on this novel. I was supposed to present/perform some sections of it in a reading soon, and now I won’t be able to do that either. I’m so bummed.  

i am completing undergrad right now and am concerned that i will have a lot of trouble completing my thesis, in light of these new stressors. the library at my university is closed, i am likely being forced to move, and i was already behind. 

This is so heartbreaking, and it's absolutely appropriate for you to mourn the loss of these months! Please also remember that even though you're not able to go to the conferences or accept the awards to applause (i.e., take the honors that you deserve!!), you have still achieved all these things--I mean that both in the sense that you should feel just as good about your accomplishments, but more to the point, all of this still belongs on a CV, like so:
Invited Presentations
"Title" at Conference, Location, Date *
"Title" at Conference, Location, Date*
*These conferences were not held due to global health crisis from COVID019.
You'll not be the only one with an asterisk--everyone's careers will be in the same boat. So don't worry about that.
But in the meantime... it sucks so much that you're missing these things, as well as just your remaining months at university. It's cosmically unfair, and I'm very sorry, in the sense of being quite sad for you and for your peers. Also I will personally eat anyone who quips "Life isn't fair" in response to college seniors' sadness at the things they're set to miss out on. 

I'm with @WildeThing here. Do what's best for you, of course, but my thought is that an English PhD doesn't nearly so often lead to a job that will pay off those loans the way an MD or JD does. Would you be okay with paying off loans when you're 40 or 50 or even beyond? Some people are, some aren't. 
If it were me, I would study up, take whatever job I could that would give me the most time to study in off-hours (temping is often full-time and reliable hours, and I know a few people who prefer restaurant work because then they can write during the day and work at night), and apply again this fall.
I remember from a couple months back that you're interested in teaching; I had a reasonably good experience in college working for a private tutoring company--some of them are really good money. Private schools also have different requirements for teaching certification, so there might be something there--I've got a friend, for instance, who taught for two years at a private school between college and applying for PhDs, with no prior teaching experience that I'm aware of whatsoever, including no certification. I was recruited for teaching, too, from a private school placement company that advertised new teachers not needing certification. 

I'd like to nominate BU for the award of "Grad Café's Choice: Worst Admissions Process" for 2020 ???? 
"I'm not too sure myself"... dang. 

Honestly, this is misery and I regret ever complaining about my empty inbox lol. Getting over 10 emails a day now—everything from current students making themselves available for a chat, replies from DGS's, professors reaching out, admins reaching out, admins requesting additional documentation (for the THIRD TIME) for reimbursement for a nonrefundable flight for a cancelled visit (which I'm starting to think I'm unlikely to ever see, which means I'm out $400). And I spent like 2 and a half hours over the weekend on the phone with the DGS and then a POI for one of my programs. And instead of feeling more informed, it honestly just created another list of things to research and people to contact. At a time when the last thing I feel is on top of my inbox, productive, or motivated. Also, despite the deluge there are still a lot of important POIs who just ... still never responded to my email, and I feel like it would be really impolite to follow up again in the middle of a world health crisis.
This is just so much time to invest, on so many different fronts, and I constantly feel 10 steps behind. I said in a previous post I wasn't sure going through all the motions for virtual visits/phone calls (for the 4 schools that had to cancel visits) would lead to me feeling like I could make an informed decision compared to the two I got to visit ... but at this point I'm not even sure I can keep doing this for even another couple weeks, let alone til April 15th.

never been sadder to have correctly anticipated something...
everyone--STAY inside, order delivery frm ur favorite local restaurant (they r rly struggling atm but are likely still open for delivery and/or curbside takeout), tip 20%, and wash your hands
sending love!!

I'd like to retract my previous post
truly did not comprehend the level that responses on all levels of US public health were gonna fuck up containment
whoops

Totally get this. Had two conferences planned, one of which would have for the first time brought me directly into contact with the artists creating the most significant contemporary works in one my main fields (queer game studies). And campus visits, of course. And I’ll be the first in my immediate family with a grad degree, so I was also excited about commencement. It really sucks, but now I’m just doing my best to look ahead to doctoral studies and how excited I am for that.

The biggest hurt for me is the possibility of not having commencement. I come from a marginalized community and made it into a top-tier program at a school that many dream of. Since day one I daydreamed of my parents coming to see me cross the finish line at this prestigious dream school. I just wanted them to see me do that. I know its dumb, but I work hard in large part to make them feel proud of me because I love them and want to succeed beyond what is normal in our community. I have been agonizing about this being cancelled. I hope this whole thing just gets under control soon. 
Thank you for this thread, I am glad I'm not the only one.