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Posted

I've heard back from everywhere that I applied to. 

So far it's all been rejections or unfunded offers, except for two waitlists. One of them is like the official waitlist where they contacted me and told me that I was on it, the other one is an unofficial waitlist where I had to reach out them after others had received their decisions. The DGS for the unofficial one told me that they had gone through the first round of decisions and are waiting to hear back from them before looking at other applicants. 

My question is how often should I keep in contact with them? For the 1st school, the unofficial one, I emailed about 10 days after the DGS told me my status and asked for an update, he told me that there wasn't any think new to report. That was on the 13th of Feb. The second school only let me know I was officially waitlisted a week ago, this morning I shot the DGS an email and asked for an update, if there was anything I could do to increase my chanced to get in, and some info about the waitlist itself (if its ranked and that kinda stuff).

Do you guys think that is all the contact I should have? I was thinking about reaching out to the first school again around March 15th, so a month after my last email to ask for an update, is that too much? I would be thrilled to go to either of these school and honestly I have no other options this cycle, so I don't want to screw it up by annoying them. But at the same time, the wait is killing me and I honestly hate this version of limbo more then the other one.  

Posted
30 minutes ago, Dwar said:

I've heard back from everywhere that I applied to. 

So far it's all been rejections or unfunded offers, except for two waitlists. One of them is like the official waitlist where they contacted me and told me that I was on it, the other one is an unofficial waitlist where I had to reach out them after others had received their decisions. The DGS for the unofficial one told me that they had gone through the first round of decisions and are waiting to hear back from them before looking at other applicants. 

My question is how often should I keep in contact with them? For the 1st school, the unofficial one, I emailed about 10 days after the DGS told me my status and asked for an update, he told me that there wasn't any think new to report. That was on the 13th of Feb. The second school only let me know I was officially waitlisted a week ago, this morning I shot the DGS an email and asked for an update, if there was anything I could do to increase my chanced to get in, and some info about the waitlist itself (if its ranked and that kinda stuff).

Do you guys think that is all the contact I should have? I was thinking about reaching out to the first school again around March 15th, so a month after my last email to ask for an update, is that too much? I would be thrilled to go to either of these school and honestly I have no other options this cycle, so I don't want to screw it up by annoying them. But at the same time, the wait is killing me and I honestly hate this version of limbo more then the other one.  

Personally, I contact them twice a month inquiring for any updates regarding my application status. Even though, I annoy them, I hope they understand to what extent it is important for me

Posted
43 minutes ago, Izakawa said:

Personally, I contact them twice a month inquiring for any updates regarding my application status. Even though, I annoy them, I hope they understand to what extent it is important for me

Thanks for that info! Both of the DGS's seem super nice and don't seem bothered at all by my reaching out. I think I'll still wait a bit to contact the first one though, I heard through the grape vine that they are going to be looking at round to admits before the 15th of march. So hopefully I'll hear something back from them soon!

Posted
1 hour ago, Dwar said:

Thanks for that info! Both of the DGS's seem super nice and don't seem bothered at all by my reaching out. I think I'll still wait a bit to contact the first one though, I heard through the grape vine that they are going to be looking at round to admits before the 15th of march. So hopefully I'll hear something back from them soon!

Yeah, I plan on reaching out once a month. If I haven't heard anything by next month, I plan on emailing them asking if I can make a self funded trip to meet the faculty and see the school. After all, if I get news on April 14, I would like to be able to make an informed decision! 

One of the professors at a school I'm waitlisted at (my dream top choice) told me "Good [that you got waitlisted]. I think you have a good chance" after she recommended me to the adcom. I also know this school has historically made several rounds of waitlists (once when all acceptances go out, once mid march, and once early April) so I am hoping for good news in the next few weeks...

Posted
21 minutes ago, itheproofofstupidity said:

I am hoping for good news

Thats great! I hope it all works out for you! That seems like a similar case with the school that I am unofficially waitlisted at, I am probably going to email closer to March 15th and see If there is an update. 

Posted (edited)

Ooof I was actually so close to giving up on gradcafe and everything and accepting my probable rejection -- almost no one turns down the program I'm waitlisted for.

But then the PI told me I'm his first choice if his admit doesn't accept, and right back to anxiety...

Edited by aggiezone
Posted
On 2/23/2019 at 11:31 PM, Izakawa said:

Waitlisted after the interview. So far, have three waitlisted status at three schools. So TERRIBLE feeling

It seems more like a personal rejection after an interview. I'm there too. And yet it isn't quite a rejection. "Jacob have I loved. Esau . . ." 

Posted

I might be insane but I just wrote a new SOP for next year, assuming I'm not gonna get in this year.  It felt good because I had so many interviews with them and I've been thinking so much about my principles and research goals! I didn't want to write it after I lose the level of focus I have right now. I was SHOCKED how much easier it was to write than the other one. Feeling good about it no matter what happens!

Posted
6 hours ago, aggiezone said:

I might be insane but I just wrote a new SOP for next year, assuming I'm not gonna get in this year.  It felt good because I had so many interviews with them and I've been thinking so much about my principles and research goals! I didn't want to write it after I lose the level of focus I have right now. I was SHOCKED how much easier it was to write than the other one. Feeling good about it no matter what happens!

that's great! 

I'm kinda in the same boat and have started to heavily prepare for the next cycle. I've already identified at least 11 schools that I want to apply to, and have already written 4/11 statements. I'm finishing up my last year in college so I have loads of free time and also am in the academic mindset, so im trying to get all of that stuff out of the way now, while I can and still have access to professors and whatnot. I also don't think I'll really want to work on paper once I start working next year.  

Posted
2 hours ago, Dwar said:

I'm kinda in the same boat and have started to heavily prepare for the next cycle. I've already identified at least 11 schools that I want to apply to, and have already written 4/11 statements. I'm finishing up my last year in college so I have loads of free time and also am in the academic mindset, so im trying to get all of that stuff out of the way now, while I can and still have access to professors and whatnot. I also don't think I'll really want to work on paper once I start working next year.  

Good for you!! Gosh, it feels a little crazy to prepare this early but it feels so much better to do it while you're thinking about applications 24/7 anyways.

Posted
24 minutes ago, aggiezone said:

Good for you!! Gosh, it feels a little crazy to prepare this early but it feels so much better to do it while you're thinking about applications 24/7 anyways.

Oh for sure, and I figure I may as well do it now when I have energy and motivation as opposed to later when im busy. Honestly I am hoping that soon I'll get off the waitlist and be able to throw them all away, but at least I'm prepared if that doesn't happen. 

Posted

Making an account here because I can't talk to anyone in real life, yay!

I'm just feeling so worthless right now.

I found out on Monday that I was waitlisted at my dream school, and rejected from just about everywhere else. Going into this whole process, I thought my stats were pretty solid, so I never even imagined I would need a backup plan. I'm completely unprepared to figure out what to do next year if I don't start grad school. And the thought of explaining everything to my family and friends and everyone who knew about my plans makes me physically ill. I feel so stupid for assuming things would work out.

I'm trying my best to keep it together at work, but it's easy to tell when I've been crying so even though I've only been doing it when no one else is around I'm sure everyone can tell, and they're all uncomfortable around me. My boss pulled me aside today and told me not to come in until I can focus. All I can think is that they don't want me around when they're doing interviews, because they don't want to scare him off by explaining that their senior technician didn't get into any grad programs. My other coworkers who applied to grad programs in different fields this year both got into their top schools, though, so at least they can mention that. I'm really happy for them, but it's hard not to feel miserable when everyone else is enjoying success and I'm wallowing in failure.

I feel absolutely awful. My boss was the only real guidance I had throughout this whole process, and now that I know she's frustrated with me I don't know who else to turn to. I feel like everyone at work is either embarrassed of me or pities me, and I know my performance has been slipping. It was easy to pull 10 hour days when I thought all my hard work would pay off, but it's hard to stay motivated when everything I've been working towards is crashing down around me.

I just don't know what to do anymore. I could reapply next year and find work in the meantime, but if two years of research experience in a big name lab isn't enough to make my applications acceptable, I can't think of how more research experience will help. I can't afford the tuition for a master's degree, and even if I could, there's no guarantee I'd get into any of those programs. I'm starting to wonder if I'm even in the right field--but this is all I know how to do.

What hurts more is that a lot of my rejections came after in-person interviews. I know I'm not the best in social situations, but this process has really beaten me down. My anxiety has been getting worse and worse. I'm not sure how I can last another four months in my current job. At this point, I'm just finding it hard to imagine getting back on my feet.

Sorry to be such a downer. Is anyone else feeling this way?

Posted (edited)
27 minutes ago, sad_raccoon said:

Making an account here because I can't talk to anyone in real life, yay!

I'm just feeling so worthless right now.

I found out on Monday that I was waitlisted at my dream school, and rejected from just about everywhere else. Going into this whole process, I thought my stats were pretty solid, so I never even imagined I would need a backup plan. I'm completely unprepared to figure out what to do next year if I don't start grad school. And the thought of explaining everything to my family and friends and everyone who knew about my plans makes me physically ill. I feel so stupid for assuming things would work out.

I'm trying my best to keep it together at work, but it's easy to tell when I've been crying so even though I've only been doing it when no one else is around I'm sure everyone can tell, and they're all uncomfortable around me. My boss pulled me aside today and told me not to come in until I can focus. All I can think is that they don't want me around when they're doing interviews, because they don't want to scare him off by explaining that their senior technician didn't get into any grad programs. My other coworkers who applied to grad programs in different fields this year both got into their top schools, though, so at least they can mention that. I'm really happy for them, but it's hard not to feel miserable when everyone else is enjoying success and I'm wallowing in failure.

I feel absolutely awful. My boss was the only real guidance I had throughout this whole process, and now that I know she's frustrated with me I don't know who else to turn to. I feel like everyone at work is either embarrassed of me or pities me, and I know my performance has been slipping. It was easy to pull 10 hour days when I thought all my hard work would pay off, but it's hard to stay motivated when everything I've been working towards is crashing down around me.

I just don't know what to do anymore. I could reapply next year and find work in the meantime, but if two years of research experience in a big name lab isn't enough to make my applications acceptable, I can't think of how more research experience will help. I can't afford the tuition for a master's degree, and even if I could, there's no guarantee I'd get into any of those programs. I'm starting to wonder if I'm even in the right field--but this is all I know how to do.

What hurts more is that a lot of my rejections came after in-person interviews. I know I'm not the best in social situations, but this process has really beaten me down. My anxiety has been getting worse and worse. I'm not sure how I can last another four months in my current job. At this point, I'm just finding it hard to imagine getting back on my feet.

Sorry to be such a downer. Is anyone else feeling this way?

 

Getting rejected/waitlisted is really difficult. When I got waitlisted at my dream school, I cried for 3 days straight and marathoned romantic comedies on Netflix. I think your boss is probably right, and you should take some time off of work to grieve.

I doubt your boss is mad at you, they probably just see that this experience is affecting your performance at work. I'm sure they were rooting for you, and were probably upset when you didn't get in as well. I would send an email thanking your boss for their support, and acknowledging that you need to take a couple of days off to deal with these feelings. 

I also recommend seeing someone to talk through your experience. Your sense of self is so thoroughly involved in applying to grad school, and the experience of getting rejected can be very shattering. Combine that with the stress of waiting, the numerous stages to the application process, and the introspection of writing the SOP,  and getting rejected feels extremely personal. A lot of really amazing people get rejected/waitlisted for grad school. I strongly suggest finding a therapist who will help you work through this experience – if you look through these forums, you'll find plenty of people who sought therapy after applying to grad school.

You mention that you don't have a backup plan. It sounds like you have a great job where you are a senior technician, with a very supportive boss who cares about your wellbeing. That sounds like a pretty good backup plan to me! 

Just because grad school doesn't happen this year doesn't mean it never will. It's tough, but see if you can treat it as a long term goal, rather than "this needs to happen for me immediately". Maybe you need to diversify and apply to more programs next year, the waitlist is an indication that at least one program sees you as being ready for grad school. Maybe there is some element of your application that you can strengthen for next time. For now, just focus on grieving, feeling your feelings, and allowing yourself to be sad.

Also, maybe when you feel up to it, you can ask the programs for feedback on why you were not admitted, to strengthen your application for next year? 90% of the time they won't be able to provide individualized feedback, but it's worth a try.

Edited by crazycheese8
Posted

I only applied to one school and was waitlisted. I'm feeling pretty heart-broken. I had been posting in another thread directly related to the program I applied to but accepted applicants have made comments that i am being negative and disvaluing peoples' hard work -) i had made some comments that i have seen really stellar applicants get rejected and some applicants who may not 'wow' on paper get accepted. 

Now I don't know where to turn. I certainly wasnt attacking anyone's hard work - and that being said, I really dont believe that accepted applicants just 'worked harder' and that's why they were accepted. The process involves so much more than that.

Anyway I just needed a somewhat safe outlet to vent to people who may currently understand how I am feeling. I am feeling distraught, rejected, and am filled with self-doubt.

Posted

Waitlisted from UMN-TC! Got a generic email yesterday... about how they DON'T rank their waitlist... why is that even a thing!

Posted (edited)

Being waitlisted hurts. 

I made contact with my POI almost a year ago, I visited the school and we spoke in person. He liked me and my application, and introduced me to lots of his students. I had an incredible day getting to know them. His students told me I was a "strong applicant".

I worked on my application, all my mentors told me I'm a perfect fit for this program. I got great recommendations, and worked extremely hard on my SOP. I submitted my application.

2 months later, I received an email inviting me to interview with my dream lab, the lab I visited, that I've been planning to apply to for years. And another email. And another. Each one of them said they really liked me and enjoyed my research ideas and hoped I got in. I spent two weeks having another hour-long interview almost every day.

Then I got the waitlist notification. I cried for a couple of days, and started to accept that I wouldn't be getting in. This lab is super competitive, and accepts only one or two people a year, and almost everyone who is admitted attends. The waitlist has around 5-10 people on it, so I figured my chances were low.

Then, 1 week later, I got an email from my POI. He told me that he wishes he could admit me, and I was his first choice alternate. However, he only has one spot available, so I'm waiting on the other person's decision. The school is so competitive, and the admissions process is so rigorous, that I would be very surprised if his admit did not accept.  

Still, even though my chances are <10% (their yield rate is very high), I can't help but get my hopes up. When I got the waitlist email, I was ready to give up hope and move on with my life. Now that I know I'm actually in the running, I can't help but obsess over my chances. It hurts knowing that my hopes are back up only to probably be smashed down. 

I was strongly encouraged to apply again next year if this year doesn't work out. I can't help but feel like I'll go through this whole thing next year only to get my hopes crushed all over again. I can't seriously spend 2 straight years of my life in application limbo? I don't know how people can still be productive while waiting on a decision that's this big. My brain doesn't work that way.

What do I do?

Edited by aggiezone
Posted

I’m still waiting to hear back from 6-7 programs...I’m thinking I didn’t get in...they said late feb.

Posted

Again, I was notified to be waitlisted. Currently, sitting on 10 rejections and 4 waitlists. Hopefully, will hear something good from any of these 4 programs. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Izakawa said:

Again, I was notified to be waitlisted. Currently, sitting on 10 rejections and 4 waitlists. Hopefully, will hear something good from any of these 4 programs. 

Same, on my 4th waitlist and 11 rejections... at least i know there is one other person (on the other side of the planet) who feels my pain!

Posted
1 hour ago, itheproofofstupidity said:

Same, on my 4th waitlist and 11 rejections... at least i know there is one other person (on the other side of the planet) who feels my pain!

 

2 hours ago, Izakawa said:

Again, I was notified to be waitlisted. Currently, sitting on 10 rejections and 4 waitlists. Hopefully, will hear something good from any of these 4 programs. 

 

Omg, four waitlists!!! I can't even imagine, sending all my energy for you two to get off your waitlists soon :)

Posted
3 hours ago, itheproofofstupidity said:

Same, on my 4th waitlist and 11 rejections... at least i know there is one other person (on the other side of the planet) who feels my pain!

Really, it is so much disgusting feeling that I could not share with anyone and now it is a relief to learn about our similar situation. Ironically, there is still more than a month until April 15, which makes the waiting process even more miserable and desperate. 

Posted

I got waitlisted to my #2 program, haven't hear back after interviews for my #1. I was wondering how to indicate to them that I'm really very interested in their program, and keep in contact with them, without giving false assurances that they are my number 1?

Is inquiring about the waitlist process okay? We have a paper submitted where I am the second author, if it gets accepted, do I let them know? There were people who I would like to work with, who I didn't get to meet during the interview, is it still okay to contact them? I'm not really sure what kind of contact I should have, what's appropriate in this situation. 

Posted

I was waitlisted for funding from Rensselaer's STS PhD, and I am devestated. Program director said I am high on the waiting list and there are three outstanding offers. All this coming about 4 hours after waking up at 6am to a rejection from UCLA. I'm pretty down in the dumps right now.

Posted

hey all I have a question. 

So seeing as my chances for grad school next year kinda shrunk with 3 rejections and 2 waitlists, I started applying to jobs. Thankfully I found a job that I really like and I interviewed with them on Monday. Yesterday I found out that I was moved to the second round of interviews, to say I was ecstatic for some good news would be an understatement. However the wording of the email made it seem like, should everything go well next week at the second interview, I could be receiving an offer either late next week or early the following one. Obviously this would be amazing and I would be so thankful, but my dream is to attend grad school and if offered admissions at either of the two waitlisted schools (provided the funding is offered and enough to live on) I would accept.

So here is my question, if offered the job next week or the week after, should I reach out to the DGS's of the schools and tell them that I have a wonderful job offer available, and ask for any updates? I know that this type of thing is normally done if an academic offer is made, but what about an actual job offer? I may be able to put the job off for a few days, I believe I read somewhere that they would need an answer within like 5 or 10 days after the offer, but thats before April 15th by a long time.

Some clarification, the job would be for a 1 year AmeriCorps position with an organization that I am pretty passionate about, the plan would be to then reapply next cycle. 

Posted

Good Afternoon,

I was recently waitlisted post interview at my top choice.

I have confirmed I would like to stay on the waitlist. I would like to stay relevant in my POIs mind.

What would anyone suggest emailing for a status update?

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