Sh*t people say when you are applying to grad school

[sansao]

"Oh really, you got in? Wow!" says the person who was, "sure I'd get in everywhere."

[EdYouKateOr]

"Oh really, you got in? Wow!" says the person who was, "sure I'd get in everywhere."

Exactly!

[stephchristine0]

"Oh really, you got in? Wow!" says the person who was, "sure I'd get in everywhere."

LOL yeah.

[Lulubelle]

I've been accepted at a few programs, but haven't gotten any assistantship offers, which I have to have to enroll in a program. Of course, everyone has been asking me if I've "decided" where I'm going, so I keep reminding them that I don't have any options to choose from and may not get any.

[sansao]

I've been accepted at a few programs, but haven't gotten any assistantship offers, which I have to have to enroll in a program. Of course, everyone has been asking me if I've "decided" where I'm going, so I keep reminding them that I don't have any options to choose from and may not get any.

Were you told there was no funding for these offers, or they just haven't sent you a financial package yet?

[acquablu]

I don't get these all of the time but once in a while:

 

"You want to go to school for another 5 years???  And what will you do when you get out? I know people who are making a lot of money and they didn't even finish college."

 

Yes, I know, but I'm not doing this solely for money.

 

"You got plenty of interviews, you will have your choice of where to go."

 

I wish that was the case.

[SLPjmar]

People ask me all the time if I've decided where to go, knowing that I haven't heard back.

 

I think they believe it to be like it was 30 years ago, where YOU got to make the decision of where you wanted to go. If I could pick, BELIEVE ME I would have done so by now.

[pears]

"why are you paying for an MA?" and related comments. argh. i have a totally oddball niche interest, even within an already-niche-ridden field of study; there aren't even that many schools that offer what i'm looking for at any grad level, and i've decided that an MA is the right plan for me right now, since i'm not committed enough to a research topic or career path to pursue a PhD right off the bat.

 

i've been getting a lot of lectures from friends, past classmates, coworkers, etc. about how it's ridiculous for me to take on loan debt to go to the only place i can really study and research what i want in full at the right degree level. the worst is when they start to ramble about how there are oh-so-many funded MAs out there, or that i should've done a PhD then bail after finishing the MA portion so i could save money, as if i hadn't done tons of research on my own about programs that suit my wants and needs, and how to fund my studies.

 

gee, i'm sorry, i forgot that everyone else and the entire peanut gallery of people i talk to grad school about is an expert in my small, unusual field of study/interest and knows everything about every program out there.   and, of course, i haven't put in, y'know, literal hours upon hours of work to ensure i'm doing the right thing to meet my goals.

[sansao]

"why are you paying for an MA?" and related comments. argh. i have a totally oddball niche interest, even within an already-niche-ridden field of study; there aren't even that many schools that offer what i'm looking for at any grad level, and i've decided that an MA is the right plan for me right now, since i'm not committed enough to a research topic or career path to pursue a PhD right off the bat.   i've been getting a lot of lectures from friends, past classmates, coworkers, etc. about how it's ridiculous for me to take on loan debt to go to the only place i can really study and research what i want in full at the right degree level. the worst is when they start to ramble about how there are oh-so-many funded MAs out there, or that i should've done a PhD then bail after finishing the MA portion so i could save money, as if i hadn't done tons of research on my own about programs that suit my wants and needs, and how to fund my studies.   gee, i'm sorry, i forgot that everyone else and the entire peanut gallery of people i talk to grad school about is an expert in my small, unusual field of study/interest and knows everything about every program out there.   and, of course, i haven't put in, y'know, literal hours upon hours of work to ensure i'm doing the right thing to meet my goals.

You were admitted to multiple schools, it was your choice. If it's worth the debt to you, it's really none of their business.

[Lulubelle]

Were you told there was no funding for these offers, or they just haven't sent you a financial package yet?

 

At two of the three programs, you have to have an assistantship to officially enroll (it's a master's in higher ed), and at the third, you can enroll, but I'd get no funding and be paying out-of-state tuition, which means I probably couldn't afford it. 

 

(There's still a chance I can get someone's leftovers with a GA, but no guarantees.)

Edited March 27, 2013 by Lulubelle

[tapdncingchemist]

My school's academic advisor talking about letters of recommendation for another student:

 

Her: "Well, he hasn't graduated yet, so I'm not writing the letter; he can't apply for PhD until he finishes his Master's"

Me: "I think that even though he's not done, he will graduate next semester, so it's typical to apply during the last year"

Her: "I will wait until he's graduated to write the letter."

 

This went on for a few minutes.  I don't actually know who he was, otherwise I would have contacted him and said to get a letter from someone else.  :-(

 

And this is the person we're supposed to go to for advice on career plans.

[ShiningInShadows]

I applied to three schools this year. #s 2 and 3 were more prestigious than my #1 choice. 2 and 3 rejected me early. #1 had late interviews.

 

#1 sent out acceptances today, April 1, of which I received one! Suffice to say I was extremely happy with this news.

 

One of the four people I told asked me if it was an April Fools joke.

 

UGH.

Edited April 2, 2013 by ShiningInShadows

[sansao]

I applied to three schools this year. #s 2 and 3 were more prestigious than my #1 choice. 2 and 3 rejected me early. #1 had late interviews.

 

#1 sent out acceptances today, April 1, of which I received one! Suffice to say I was extremely happy with this news.

 

One of the four people I told asked me if it was an April Fools joke.

 

UGH.

 

Congratulations!  I bet that's a huge relief for you.  I wonder if schools restrain admissions related emails on April 1st.  I doubt it, but it's an entertaining thought, that we're both that desperate and that paranoid. 

[Britt0131]

**when telling people how much money it will be**

Can't you defer?

**last year when I got into Central Saint Martins in London**

You need all that money upfront for a visa? Is there a way to override it? Can't you just live in London?

[child of 2]

premise: I'm doing a co-op, which is supposed to be like a long term interview process for a full time position.

 

my boss: so what are your plans?

me: umm my plan currently is this co-op, and I haven't really thought very far ahead yet. 

[sansao]

I've been getting a lot of the, "Don't go to school X, the cost of living is way too high" comments from family lately. I appreciate the concern, but I'm anticipating poverty wherever I end up going, so it's not that much of an issue.

[drpepper711]

Many of these are funny. But what about what one of your truly jackass, ignorant relatives say. This is one I got, "Are you never going to get a job? Isn't that enough school?'

Others:
"When are you going to get married? You should get married first then start you PhD."

Extremely limited contact with family is definitely one of the perks of the PhD for me. 

[SLPjmar]

I officially decided to attend USF, but my SO's mother is NOT happy. She has come up with gems such as:

 

"Florida is mostly for the old, you know that, right?"

 

"South Florida will be too hot for you."

 

"Are you sure that's the right decision?"

 

[dazedandbemused]

I love this thread so much, but I never had anything to add earlier since my family is, by and large, cool with the idea of me going to grad school. However, now that I've made my decision I've had quite a few good ones come my way. MY dad wanted me to attend Pitt, which is in super easy distance of home, and he kept giving me ridiculous reasons not to go to UT Austin.

 

"Pitt is offering you a fantastic opportunity!" (Whereas Austin is offering me chopped liver?)

 

"You already know people in the department at Pitt! You'll have to start over again at Austin!" (because knowing people is the hallmark of research fit and program compatibility).

 

"You can never tell about people in the south." (I don't even...)

 

"There's the chance that some of your professor's might be racist; you don't want to go into that environment" (you know, because everyone in Texas is racist. Notwithstanding the fact that most of the faculty got their degrees in, and are probably from, the north!).

 

And from the family friends:

"You're moving to Texas? Is your father going to let you?" (because it's not like I'm a grown adult who has lived almost entirely away from home for eight years now!)

[katieliz456]

I officially decided to attend USF, but my SO's mother is NOT happy. She has come up with gems such as:

 

"Florida is mostly for the old, you know that, right?"

 

Bahahaha that's hilarious!

[child of 2]

I love this thread so much, but I never had anything to add earlier since my family is, by and large, cool with the idea of me going to grad school. However, now that I've made my decision I've had quite a few good ones come my way. MY dad wanted me to attend Pitt, which is in super easy distance of home, and he kept giving me ridiculous reasons not to go to UT Austin.

 

"Pitt is offering you a fantastic opportunity!" (Whereas Austin is offering me chopped liver?)

 

"You already know people in the department at Pitt! You'll have to start over again at Austin!" (because knowing people is the hallmark of research fit and program compatibility).

 

"You can never tell about people in the south." (I don't even...)

 

"There's the chance that some of your professor's might be racist; you don't want to go into that environment" (you know, because everyone in Texas is racist. Notwithstanding the fact that most of the faculty got their degrees in, and are probably from, the north!).

 

And from the family friends:

"You're moving to Texas? Is your father going to let you?" (because it's not like I'm a grown adult who has lived almost entirely away from home for eight years now!)

 

people are nice in Texas, but there is some racial tension, imo. At work, all the white people hang out with each other.  I call it the white boy's club. But Ive heard austin is nice.

[RiffRam]

I love this thread so much, but I never had anything to add earlier since my family is, by and large, cool with the idea of me going to grad school. However, now that I've made my decision I've had quite a few good ones come my way. MY dad wanted me to attend Pitt, which is in super easy distance of home, and he kept giving me ridiculous reasons not to go to UT Austin.

 

"Pitt is offering you a fantastic opportunity!" (Whereas Austin is offering me chopped liver?)

 

"You already know people in the department at Pitt! You'll have to start over again at Austin!" (because knowing people is the hallmark of research fit and program compatibility).

 

"You can never tell about people in the south." (I don't even...)

 

"There's the chance that some of your professor's might be racist; you don't want to go into that environment" (you know, because everyone in Texas is racist. Notwithstanding the fact that most of the faculty got their degrees in, and are probably from, the north!).

 

And from the family friends:

"You're moving to Texas? Is your father going to let you?" (because it's not like I'm a grown adult who has lived almost entirely away from home for eight years now!)

This made me laugh! Just to clarify, Texas is NOT the South. Texas is Texas, and there is a difference. And having grown up in Austin, there is definitely not a big racism problem. The only "racist" part of the state is probably East Texas. You'll enjoy your time in Austin. Have a purple margarita at Baby A's for me, and a Mexican Martini at Trudy's!

[Nanolol]

Another goodie, "Are you sure you did everything you could on your apps?" I actually considered adding glitter in my FedEx envelope for my transcripts, but hopefully spending almost 6 months preparing for the GRE, 3 months on the statement and obsessing over my apps even AFTER I submitted should be enough. Well, I guess I could have sent a musical card too.

 

HAHAHAHAHAHA awesome! 

 

 

 

[nugget]

One friend of mine kept on saying for months, Don't worry, you got all A's so you'll get in. (That was frustrating since there are other factors besides grades. And my A- average is not the same as an A!!! Somehow, she didn't understand that).

 

After I made it quite clear how difficult it is to get in and told her the odds of getting accepted, it took a rejection letter from a really good school for her to clue in that it's really competitive.

 

Then she finally asked, But why is it so difficult to get in? My brother in !@#$#%# got into his Masters program, no problem.

 

Again, I PATIENTLY explained that there is next to no work in your brother's field (which is why he had to go back to school after the Master's) and everyone knows there's lots of work in this field so lots of people are applying.

 

But why is the cut off so high?? Why did they only take people with an A- or higher??

 

I give up.....

Edited April 30, 2013 by jenste

[MikKar]

Many of these are funny. But what about what one of your truly jackass, ignorant relatives say. This is one I got, "Are you never going to get a job? Isn't that enough school?'

Others:

"When are you going to get married? You should get married first then start you PhD."

Extremely limited contact with family is definitely one of the perks of the PhD for me. 

 

Funny that. One of the reasons some people drop out of the Ph.D is precisely because of a second half appearing in life...