Older students?

[NavyMom]

In one of my classes last semester the instructor, who is also head of the program, asked the whole class who was an "older" student and then looked at me until I raised my hand. He was trying to point out that our different backgrounds mean that we might have a bit more confidence and speak out more (not true of me, as I'm pretty shy at times). I know his intentions weren't bad, but I could have hit him. I guess it's not like anyone hadn't already noticed though...plus I'm the only married student in my class, so that stands out.

Oh wow!! That's awful! I am hoping there will be other "older" students in my class. Should be because of the nature of it, but you never know. I will be 39 this year. (It's also the day I participate in the commencement ceremonies for my Bachelor's degree). I am married too, and I have a grown son in the Navy.

[ss2player]

Love this thread!

 

I'm going to be turning 28 when I (hopefully) start a biomedical PhD this year, and I definitely hope there are other older students in my hypothetical program. Potentially graduating at 32-33 is not something I had planned but life just kind of worked out that way. 

 

I'm going on my first interview tomorrow and am kind of worried I'll be the only person over 24. Working and living on my own for the past 3.5 years feels like a leg up on them, so hopefully my maturity will shine through throughout the process. (I even have a 403b going! That'll make you feel like an ADULT, let me tell ya)

 

Best wishes to everyone this season and I'll make sure to keep up with this topic!

[CageFree]

In in my mid-30s and a 2nd year Ph.D. student. I'm on the older end within my department but not the oldest. I would say my life experience has been helpful in grad school... especially as a T.A..

[LMac]

 

I'm going on my first interview tomorrow and am kind of worried I'll be the only person over 24. Working and living on my own for the past 3.5 years feels like a leg up on them, so hopefully my maturity will shine through throughout the process. (I even have a 403b going! That'll make you feel like an ADULT, let me tell ya)

 

 

If your experience is anything like mine (and I imagine this is somewhat universal), having a bit more life experience is a huge bonus. Best of luck tomorrow!

[ss2player]

If your experience is anything like mine (and I imagine this is somewhat universal), having a bit more life experience is a huge bonus. Best of luck tomorrow!

 

Thanks, LMac! I'll take that mindset with me. I've been TAing recently which has helped me adjust to being around "young" people again.

 

P.S. - you go to Emory, right? My old coworker/friend is there for med school. I thought about applying but didn't think I'd have the UG grades. Anyway, yay for random connections!

[LMac]

Yep, I'm at Emory. I didn't think I had the grades either, but I think my program focuses on the applicant's whole picture versus GPA/GRE cut offs (thank goodness). That's quite a list of interviews you have. I'm sure you'll have your pick of schools once application season wraps up. Best of luck!

[med latte]

Are you an older student too, levoyous?

One crappy thing about starting a PhD at almost 33 is the relentless ticking of the biological clock. Women who started PhDs when that age or older, how did you manage a balance? Start trying to conceive after coursework?

 

I'm 37, and my future mother-in-law is ticking the biological clock for me.  When she hints about wanting grandchildren, a part of me thinks "But I am giving birth! I'm having a dissertation!"  (maybe)  

[Brisingamen]

I'm 37, and my future mother-in-law is ticking the biological clock for me.  When she hints about wanting grandchildren, a part of me thinks "But I am giving birth! I'm having a dissertation!"  (maybe)  

Yes, you are! *cheering from the stands*

[Brisingamen]

Brisingamen, I'm glad to find someone else in the same boat as me. I'm applying this year, and if I'm accepted, I'll be 29 when I start the program.This is something that has been causing me a lot of anxiety as well, as I do hope to get married and start a family eventually. I don't want to put off school any longer, and just hope that when the time comes I'll be able to handle everything at once.

I hope it all works out. Sometimes it feels as if the anxiety just comes from wanting to do things on a certain timeline. But we have to make tough decisions because very often, the timeline just goes berserk.

[Inka dreams]

I am so happy... All you guys and gals make me feel so much better! Im from India and the parental pressure to marry by 30 is so effing huge!! And to think of it all my friends are already married and with kids... 

 

But I still want my masters degree and I don't want to give up!

[Lifesaver]

I had several older classmates (40+) in my first master's program. I loved having them in class! I honestly believe that we learned a lot from each other and class definitely would not have been the same without them. My class actually got fairly close and would go to dinner, sporting events, get drinks, etc, as a group - older and younger together. Don't let the youngins sway your decision; you may actually enjoy being in their company!

Edited January 23, 2014 by Lifesaver

[NavyMom]

I'm looking forward to seeing what the mix will be like in my cohort. Old and young, various experiences and backgrounds. Everyone has so much to offer at the table to help teach others. I hope my group gets close too. We'll be together for 3 years. I am looking forward to starting.

[csibaldwin]

Wow!!

I didn't think this thread would take off when I created it. Pretty awesome stuff. It's nice to see you all here, and know I am not alone in my venture for higher education.

I am home sick today. Woke up Tues morning feeling a little "ick", thinking it was probably allergies and dealt with it all day. Woke up this morning with a full blown cold. I haven't been sick in a few years.

We should set up a place where we can chat from time to time, maybe create our own Skype group or something? What do you all think?

My wife and I also do not want kids, so this is not an issue for us. I think every person is different, some people could handle having kids during grad school, and others may not.

[emmm]

I went to med school 3 years out of undergrad, and had kids at the time. It is extremely hard to do it all at once unless you have fantastic support systems (especially family members nearby who can help out -- which my husband and I did not have). I ended up finishing school but then staying home for years. Now...back in (grad) school in my 40s. It's been interesting being in school with kids in college :-)

 

It is possible to do it all, but it is not easy. And forget about any sort of "balance" while you're doing it. My life was school - kids - study-sleep - repeat. I had no "life" if you mean going out to eat, spending time with friends, TV, leisure reading, exercise, fill in whatever else you want. And even sleep was "compressed," so get used to feeling exhausted all the time.

[NavyMom]

I agree with you. I have no real balance in mine neither, my life currently is work, school, study, sleep. If I want to do anything I have to find time to pencil time in to my calendar.

[Late Blooming Linguist]

Hi fellow older students! ()/ I'm in my early 40s, never married, no kids, kind of living the way I did in my 20s. So in a way I would blend in with the traditionally aged grad students! (I even still get carded.) But in other ways, I'm an old fart who gets exasperated with *some* millenials

I'm glad to have found this thread. I didn't see it until after I'd applied to a couple of schools in early January. Unsurprisingly, I didn't get accepted. I think that when I gook the GRE and got surprisingly good scores in my first go, I got really confident and thought I'd apply to dream schools' PhD programs in Linguistics.

Now that I've got a full year before applying again I'm looking more in-depth at a lot more programs. I was wondering, do y'all think it's better for people my age to do a Master's program, then apply for doctorate programs? Because it's been just over 2 decades since I graduated college, I don't really have "fresh" academic work to show. Plus there's the issue of having letter-of-recommendation writers who can speak specifically to your academic prowess rather than your work success.

Any words of wisdom would be great, whether from fellow oldsters or from the sharper members of the GradCafe community!

Thanks much!

[CulturalAnth]

What is considered "older"? I am 32 (will be 33 in the Fall). So, I guess that includes me, though I don't feel like I am "older"! I have three kids, and found out I am pregnant with my fourth, unplanned, right after I applied to grad schools! When I went to visit a couple schools, I certainly wasn't the oldest, and I am not the oldest finishing my undergrad either. 

 

I have the additional frustration of custody with my oldest 2, and will have to have the courts tell me if I can move them with me or not :/ My husband is in computer science and can telecommute wherever we go. He's super supportive of me following my dreams, and he'll follow me anywhere <3 

[CulturalAnth]

Yes, that's it. And apologies, i should have addressed that post to women in their thirties in gad school who DO want kids, not all women in their thirties in grad school.

Trouble is, I want both. And they're both very important. Technically, grad school could wait, but one can't put it off to do something as uncertain as having kids.

Do what comes up first, I guess.

 

I am in my thirties and DO have kids. (See post above this one) For me, having them while in school makes the most sense for what I want to do. They will be older when I am ready to really go out in the field, abroad, and I can have my career when they are in school. But, I have always been a non-trad student. I didn't start my B.S until after I had my oldest. 

[gr8pumpkin]

Just turned 40.  I have a DMA (there's an old joke saying it stands for "Doesn't Mean Anything"), but found after graduating that I was more interested in teaching music theory than pursuing my original field.  But it's nearly impossible to find a tenure-track teaching job teaching music theory without an actual PhD in theory, so I'm going back to school to get one.  I'm still waiting to hear from Top Choice (as it says currently in signature), but I'd be perfectly happy at Safety School so I'll be in a program in fall 2014 regardless.  I had a non-TT faculty post for three years at a pretty well-regarded school so I've seen both sides of the desk, as it were.  Knowing now how professors on the other side of the desk see students, talk about students, etc., I'm going to try to be That Student that all the professors rave about this time around, rather than the smart ass I sort of was last time.  I came out of it with my degree intact but without the warmest of relationships to avail upon.  One doesn't get many second chances in life but I'm going to make the most of this one.

[PsycD]

Boy is it nice to see this thread and know that I am not alone.

 

People thought I had lost my mind when I left my "great" career, sold my house, and went back to school full time. I know, deep down, those same people were saying, "Wow...I wish I could do that." 

 

It was a big gamble, and at times, I thought I may have been crazy for giving up everything to pursue a second bachelor's and a doctoral degree.  But now, having just been accepted into my dream school and preparing to move to another country...I don't even have the words to describe the feeling.  I admire all of you for having the guts to pursue your dreams and stay the course, despite friends/family/society telling you what you should be doing at your age.  Please keep sharing your stories!  You have no idea how much you are encouraging others by doing so.

[Kellybel]

New to this forum and the whole grad school process. I'm almost 42, with one 13yr old son and one 12yr old step son... and decided to head back to get my masters in speech path after strings of low paying jobs and taking some non traditional one's too. I have a BS where I majored in Education, and actually took a year of speech path classes before switching majors to Elem Education. Now I'm back and swimming in the sea of info and trying to grasp how to work towards my degree again.

 

I have to have a program close to where I live or one that is offered online. I'm also looking into scholarships and financial support. 

 

Looking forward to learning and connecting with others also on the path to a new career. I'm totally new to the process of applying and testing to get in!

[PsycD]

New to this forum and the whole grad school process. I'm almost 42, with one 13yr old son and one 12yr old step son... and decided to head back to get my masters in speech path after strings of low paying jobs and taking some non traditional one's too. I have a BS where I majored in Education, and actually took a year of speech path classes before switching majors to Elem Education. Now I'm back and swimming in the sea of info and trying to grasp how to work towards my degree again.

 

I have to have a program close to where I live or one that is offered online. I'm also looking into scholarships and financial support. 

 

Looking forward to learning and connecting with others also on the path to a new career. I'm totally new to the process of applying and testing to get in!

 

Hey, Kellybel!  I'm a Communication Sciences and Disorders student (well, at least I will be starting in the fall)...it's great to see a fellow SLP/CSD applicant here! 

 

I'm not sure if you've visited the SLP forum, but there is a lot of information and some great people there who can help answer a lot of your questions about SLP programs and the entire application process.  Of course, I'd be happy to answer what questions I can.  

[DogMa]

I was hoping this thread would still be going.

At my mandatory orientation everyone thought I was a parent. And asked me about my grad student child. I do have one person older than me in my program but I think most people assume that I'm in my 30s.

As for those worried about the biological clock. When my husband went back to vet school there were a number of women who got married, pregnant, had young children and made it work. And vet school is not only intensive intellectually but physically as well.

[Sumrin]

I am 34 with four children who are all above ten years of age. I got rejected from all schools I applied to this year. I worked so hard and still I didn't make it.. Probably it wasn't enough. By the next year round obviously I would have lost one year that could have been used for graduate study.. seeing people like me here is kind of relieving. But yes going through the admission cycle all over again is stressful... Should I just give up... ?? 

[beyondaboundary]

I am 34 with four children who are all above ten years of age. I got rejected from all schools I applied to this year. I worked so hard and still I didn't make it.. Probably it wasn't enough. By the next year round obviously I would have lost one year that could have been used for graduate study.. seeing people like me here is kind of relieving. But yes going through the admission cycle all over again is stressful... Should I just give up... ??

Only you will know how much you want it. Personally I'm all for going again if you can or more importantly, if you want to. Rejection does not define your worth Edited March 13, 2014 by beyondaboundary