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Everything posted by Adelaide9216
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I am not the best person to help her. I don't know her friends and family, she is a total stranger to me. She said deleting me from her FB is better for her mental health so she did. She can do whatever is best for her, I don't really care tbh.
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I am the co-coordinator of a program (we brought 40 students to Parliament Hill so they could shadow a member of parliament or a senator) and it was a success. We came back yesterday evening. I am so relieved because I was a bit anxious that everything would turn out right, but it did. We even had an MP in the House of Commons welcoming us during Question Period (I saw that on my way back to home). So today I had the opportunity to sleep in my bed till 11am to reward myself today hahaha. Thank you for this thread by the way, I need to focus on positive things these days.
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Women's/Feminist/Gender Studies Fall 2017
Adelaide9216 replied to kekology4's topic in Interdisciplinary Studies
Hello everyone, I will be working in December on my application to Ethics board and I have to think very precisely about my research topic. I'm having trouble identifying frameworks to analyze the data I will collect from my interviews. I know I want to use intersectionality for sure for my research. However, I would need a second framework and I am unsure of which one to pick. I'm doing research on a marginalized group of women (indigenous women). Would feminism be enough as a "framework" or is it too broad? What kind of other frameworks exist when doing this type of research? PS : I got selected to present in Paris!!! I'm so happy.- 232 replies
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- womens studies
- feminist studies
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I also want to add that I am constantly socializing. Really. I am involved in many different projects and I meet new people all. the. time. Yet, nobody seems interested in me. Or if it is the case, they are already involved in another relationship. I feel so discouraged. I feel trapped because I have seriously tried everything.
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You know, I've experienced severe depression as a child and teenager. Now that I am an adult, I'm a striver. Whenever I want to do something, I just do it because I've realized that life is really short and that I may not have the opportunity to do the things I want to do in the future. I don't take my current state for granted. So I try to do things that make me happy. It's the biggest lesson I've learned from the most difficult experience of my life and I am grateful for that. Life is short. Inevitably, I get noticed for the things I do. It's okay, I want to spread hope. But I always try to put forward that I have struggled and that I am no superhuman. I don't want people to think that my life is perfect. I don't want people to be envious or feel bad because they can't do the things I do. I don't want them to compare themselves to me. Everyone is unique and that's okay. I'm very open about the mental health issues I still continue to live with. But some people still seem to feel insecure around me while I don't want to be seen as "different" or "better" than anyone else. My classmates seem to be intimidated by who I am, so I always push myself to be open about my insecurities and my past so people can feel that I am just like them. But it doesn't always work. People tell me regularly that they envy me or that they've heard of other people being envious of me and I just hate to hear that. I hate when people say that I am a "star" because I feel like it creates a distance or a wall between me and everyone else. Just because I do talks and media interviews every once in a while, doesn't mean that I am "better" than anyone else. I'm just like everyone. And I have insecurities too. That's why I empathize with this woman even though I feel that she wants to make me feel guilty for simply being who I am.
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I can't believe that we will hear back from them only in April. Wow.
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What if SOP research interests change later on??
Adelaide9216 replied to eilonwy21's question in Questions and Answers
I agree. It's expected that your subject may change along the way. There is nothing wrong with that. It may actually show that you're flexible, thinking about what's being done out there and adapting to it all. But if you stay with the same research topic, there's nothing wrong with that too.- 10 replies
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- program fit
- research interest
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I also find her childish. Especially considering the fact that she appears to be much older than I am. But at the same time, I empathize with her. But I think I won't respond to her. Best option.
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I have actually never met her in person. I don't consider her as a friend. She used to be someone who was following my work and some of the stuff I do. A few months ago, she got upset with me because I did not like her FB page back. That's what I find strange. I never know what to do when I get messages from people who are visibly distressed. I already talk a lot about trauma at school and in other parts of my life, and I feel like I don't want to deal with it on FB as well.
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Oh I see. Sorry for the confusion.
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Someone on social media wrote me a private FB message saying that she basically doesn't want to hear anymore from me because I am "shining too bright". She wants more "low-profile" people around her because she feels like a failure since she feels like she can't achieve the things I have achieved in my life. It wasn't a mean message, more a sad one. I literally do not know what to say or even if I should respond to this. I know it has nothing to do with me at the end of the day and it's mostly due to her own fears and insecurities (and I totally empathize with that). I'm not here to please everyone anyway. But it's just very sad. What would you have done in that case? For now, I think I won't respond..
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I am definitely open to dating out. I've noticed, over the years, that when men of other backgrounds come toward me, it is to have an "exotic experience" and not to have me as a real partner in a real relationship. I've had men that I had disclosed the feelings I had for them responding back to me saying things like "you're really beautiful and I would like to see how it feels like to fuck a black girl" basically. Or, I've been rejected by white men who had romantic feelings towards me but were afraid of what other people would think of us. One of them is someone I loved for four years. He's now married and has a kid with a white girl. That's why I feel kinda depressed over this because it has happened to me through my entire life. I feel like there's no escape one way or the other. I also tried dating websites. For the last four years. I can't count the number of dates I had, and I've encountered these situations a lot or I just wouldn't feel like it could work so I gave up entirely on trying that. I also tried in the last six-seven months to not attempt anything at all to find a partner, in the hopes that someone would come towards me. Nobody came towards me. I feel like people are literally afraid of me. But I am a very nice person and I am well appreciated in my community. But for romantic stuff, I NEVER have boys asking me out, it's always me doing the first steps. I just don't know what to do anymore. I try to focus on school and work otherwise, I'll just keep thinking about how terrified I am of never having children and have a family. (and having a family is not even something I mention when I date because I don't want to put pressure). I just feel like I am doomed in this aspect. I truly find this very difficult to accept and to deal with. Makes me feel like there is something wrong with me. People tell me that it isn't the case though. But I don't know what to do. I just wish I knew how it felt like to love someone who loves me back.
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wow, that's amazing! Thank you so much!!!!
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It's not worth it if you're never experiencing the positive aspects of it.
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It,s not reciprocal. Just like I had assumed. I hate this. I hate being in love, everytime it just destroys my whole spirit
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I just told a man with whom I've been friends for the last four years that I have feelings for him. I haven't gotten his answer back, but I'm sure it won't be the one I am hoping for. I'm so ridiculous, I don't even know why I put myself through this, everytime it's the same negative result no matter who I declare myself to. I'm sure this is going to ruin our friendship, on top of it. I'm an idiot. I hate this
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I am on Facebook. I have a love-hate relationship with it. But I get somewhat anxious every time I post a more political or personal post. I have more than a 1000 friends on FB and I always feel stupid almost when I post something and only a small number of people likes it or shares it. How silly is that?
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Thanks!
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Yes, I do have Endnote, I was more asking in terms of the actual content of an annotated bibliography. What are the specifics of it? Thanks
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Hello, what are some of your best tools and guides to produce an annotated bibliography? I looked a little bit online, I've never done one before. Just wanted to know if you guys had specific tools or guides or books that you use to do this. Thanks,
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Thank you all. Once, someone asked me if I am a lesbian because they never heard about me having a boyfriend in years. (stupid question, yeah I know). Another time, someone asked me "Well, it seems like you don't want a boyfriend". Which is entirely false. I want to be with someone, but with someone with whom I'll be happy and have interesting conversations with, not just the first one that will come my way. I'm lucky to be really passionate about school and my work otherwise I'd just be depressed. I just find it so hard to find someone interesting. Every time I do, they're already involved in a relationship with someone else. And every time, they tell me "I would be interested in you if I was single." I'm just not lucky with these things. Makes me so sad sometimes.
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Thank you all for your replies. It means a lot to me. I just wish I knew what it feels like to be in love with someone that genuinely loves me back. I feel like I have a lot to give, and I do believe that I am worthy of love, but it seems like nobody is seeing my potential as a partner.
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Hello, This is a bit of a personal/off-topic thread. I've often been told that as a woman of color in graduate school, it will be harder for me to find a partner. Because the things that I represent don't fit the image that most people have of black women. And yes, I have to admit that I have been single my entire life. I am about to turn 25 in a month and I haven't been successful in my romantic life in the same way that I am perceived to be in my professional/academic life. I have never been in a committed relationship with anyone. But I am still young, so I try to remain hopeful but as I see all of my friends getting married, engaged or having children, I would be lying if I said that I am starting to lose hope. Even if I am truly passionate about my career and the projects I am involved in, I don't want my life to be only that. A friend of mine was telling me the other day that all the work that I do, the activism that I am involved in outside of the classroom and the media attention that I get might make it difficult for a man to approach me because I don't "fit" in. The thing is that I don't want to change the things that I am involved in because they make me happy and keep me grounded and sane. But I get these kinds of reflections from friends and adults since my teenage years. It's starting to hurt to get this feeling that I have to choose between being myself and finding a partner. I just want someone who accepts me as I am and with whom I can have interesting conversations with but it seems to be too much to ask. Do you think that finding love is harder for people pursuing graduate studies or with graduate diplomas, especially if they are part of a minority group? Do you think the whole idea of a woman being successful makes it harder to her to find a partner? I am happy in my life and I have never been happier but yes, sometimes, I do feel some kind of void in the sense that I fear to fail my personal life. I am able to manage that fear by trying to focus on the things that I already have in my life, and yes, I do have a lot already and I recognize that with great humility. And I try to cherish that because nothing can be taken for granted. I'm in a good place in my life and it has not always been the case. However, I'm afraid of turning into the kind of unattached woman who just works and has her career for sole purpose in her life.
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I enjoy my classes as well. I only got As so far so it reassures me that I am doing fine even if it's a lot of work.
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How does it work it work in a research team where everyone has to do a lit review but not everyone is bilingual (EN and FR)? I might be in that situation, working with a faculty who is unilingual anglophone. I speak and understand English, but I am a francophone and do not feel comfortable doing an entire lit review in English due to my grammar. I don't want the prof to be spending time correcting my grammar throughout the process... any thoughts?