This this this!
Ive mentioned it in other threads too. My parents came to the States when they were teenagers. Both graduated from high school, but the quality of their education is a bit suspect. I remember helping my mom balance her checkbook when I was 8 or 9 years old, and proofreading my dad's letters when I was in middle school. The one advantage I had was that my father made a decent enough living for us to be middle-class. I don't remember money for necessities ever being an issue, but once I got into college it was made quite clear that I was on my own.
Because of this, Ive been working non-stop since I was 16. I mean, the day I turned 16 I went to the local Burger King & asked for a job (I hated that job. I always smelled like Cini-Minis). It's a running joke among my friends that I've literally worked in every industry. At this point, Ive been working non-stop for 12 years and I'm already burned out lol.
I didn't consider my first-generation status to be a disadvantage until I entered graduate school. Here I have met people from all over the world that knew things I couldn't even grasp. They had read books by authors such as Dostoevsky, Kafka, and Cummings in high school. We never had books in my house growing up. My father always said, "if you're not working or cleaning, you're wasting time." My fellow students also had such an amazing command of the English language -- honestly, I didn't realize how poor my English skills were until this point. Suddenly, I realized how terrible my family's English was, and how that had affected my English, too. It had to start all over again. At 28 years old, I was learning proper English! I felt so behind.
Sometimes I get a little jealous when my classmates talk about the trips they're going to take, or the things they're going to do over the weekend, or (I'm ashamed to say) the things they're going to buy etc. I have 3 jobs (1 full time, one freelance, and one seasonal) so I'm constantly going to one job or another. With all these jobs, I'm still just making enough to pay my bills, keep food in the house, and pay for other incidentals. I'm just managing to keep up with my schoolwork and my thesis. I complained about not having time to finish all my work to one of my peers and she responded, "Just call your parents & tell them you can't work anywmore!" I thought, "WOW. Why didn't I think of that!"
Besides financial and education issues, it's difficult to convince my parents that what I'm doing is worth it. They still don't understand what it is to be a graduate student. As I said before, my father values working or cleaning -- but studying?? My goal is to study as a career? I thought his head was going to explode when I tried to explain to him what a Ph.D entails. My mother, too. As the previous poster said, Im going to have to pursue this dream with or without my family's support. I think it is a big obstacle for first-generation students especially -- my parents see success in terms of money, not knowledge.
On a positive note:
The best parts about a low-income upbringing is that living on a 1500 stipend isn't that much different than any other time in life, and when that 6 figure job drops we'll have the common sense to still live like we do on that 1500 stipend
a 1500$ stipend!! Thats way more than I'm living off now. I won't even know what to do with all that money .