angel_kaye13 Posted January 21, 2017 Posted January 21, 2017 4 hours ago, pippi said: Hi ThePomoHipster! unless a member of the admissions committee happens to be lurking, i would assume that no one here has a definitive answer to your question. but my general strategy for remaining sane throughout the admissions process has been to expect the worst. that way, i can be prepared in the case of bad news and pleasantly surprised if things unexpectedly go my way. my partner helps me out with that too, e.g. whenever i am like, "i will probably hear from X school this week!", he looks me in the eye and says, "come on, you're not going to hear from any schools this week, next week, or the week after that." You guys are weird/a hoot! (Meant in the teasing way between friends "weird," not in any actual mean or name-calling way.) I actually like that my husband thinks the sun shines out my rear - he tells me all the time that I'll get in, but we both equally and simultaneously agree that, if I don't? Well, then I get to be with him (we're military) and work and build up my resume. (And, personally, I like to think that maybe there are adventures I can't see yet, because I want my PhD so much...Life has twists and turns, yeah?) All that to say, whether you like to beat yourself up or preen under praise, this was a hoot. And, to all of us, just...eternal ray of optimism: grad applications don't decide our worth. ^^ <3 Best of luck, to all! biyutefulphlower, Dr. Old Bill, Warelin and 1 other 4
Abyss21 Posted January 21, 2017 Posted January 21, 2017 5 hours ago, pippi said: but my general strategy for remaining sane throughout the admissions process has been to expect the worst. Thanks for the advice! I was expecting the best and now I'm pacing myself for the worst. Seeing people starting to get interviews has definitely helped with that mindset change haha. Also my partner actually has been the positive one in this whole experience.
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 21, 2017 Author Posted January 21, 2017 Personally, every time I think I'm a sure bet to get accepted, I begin a sequence of self-flagellation and bathing in vinegar while reading Heidegger. Works like a charm. Warelin, kirbs005, biyutefulphlower and 6 others 9
pippi Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 (edited) 4 hours ago, angel_kaye13 said: You guys are weird/a hoot! (Meant in the teasing way between friends "weird," not in any actual mean or name-calling way.) I actually like that my husband thinks the sun shines out my rear - he tells me all the time that I'll get in, but we both equally and simultaneously agree that, if I don't? Well, then I get to be with him (we're military) and work and build up my resume. (And, personally, I like to think that maybe there are adventures I can't see yet, because I want my PhD so much...Life has twists and turns, yeah?) All that to say, whether you like to beat yourself up or preen under praise, this was a hoot. And, to all of us, just...eternal ray of optimism: grad applications don't decide our worth. ^^ <3 Best of luck, to all! Haha yeah I guess people have different ways of dealing. I'm definitely NOT suggesting that anyone beat themselves up over anything admissions-related. It's just that, for me personally, it was really, really hard to get past my self-doubt and go through with the application process; the only way i could bring myself to do it was by treating it as an exercise in failure. I told myself that the object of the process wasn't to get in somewhere, but rather to summon the courage to put myself out there, knowing that the likely outcome would be rejection, given the hyper-competitive and arbitrary nature of phd admissions. I'm already ridiculously proud of myself for all the work I did to apply. Anything that comes after is just super delicious icing on an empowerment cake. Everyone on these boards should be proud of themselves for applying! Plenty of people quit before they even take the GRE. Edited January 22, 2017 by pippi biyutefulphlower, Warelin, Dr. Old Bill and 4 others 7
Caien Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 21 minutes ago, pippi said: Haha yeah I guess people have different ways of dealing. I'm definitely NOT suggesting that anyone beat themselves up over anything admissions-related. It's just that, for me personally, it was really, really hard to get past my self-doubt and go through with the application process; the only way i could bring myself to do it was by treating it as an exercise in failure. I told myself that the object of the process wasn't to get in somewhere, but rather to summon the courage to put myself out there, knowing that the likely outcome would be rejection, given the hyper-competitive and arbitrary nature of phd admissions. I'm already ridiculously proud of myself for all the work I did to apply. Anything that comes after is just super delicious icing on an empowerment cake. Everyone on these boards should be proud of themselves for applying! Plenty of people quit before they even take the GRE. You make a good point here. For months I've been in the library after work and at weekends, and put off visiting home or going out with friends to work on application materials. When I explain I'm applying to PhD programs, people always assume its just a matter of filling out a form and maybe firing off an old essay. Even when I explain all the research and preparation required, it really doesn't seem to me that people appreciate the amount of work and dedication involved just to get to the point where you hit submit. Part of me seriously thinks that the real purpose of the GRE is to make us jump through as many hoops as possible in order to weed out all the people who might only apply out of curiosity or because they think grad school is an easy way to put off joining the work force for a few more years. Given that the consensus seems to be it signifies almost nothing about our ability or potential as scholars (particularly the Subject) and its ridiculous stress and expense, it must really reduce the numbers of applications the adcomms have to wade through... anon4now, Dr. Old Bill, biyutefulphlower and 2 others 5
FeetInTheSky Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 Enough time on this website has taught me that if you're sure of yourself, you're delusional. I mentioned this on the "waiting it out" board, but whenever I start to freak out I work on my "what if I don't get in plan." Rather than sitting at home and thinking about it, I actually have like a physical document of which steps to take, what jobs to apply for, which summer programs to consider, etc. So if the worst happens, I have an "in case of emergency break glass" document I'm one of those colossal dweebs who finds solace in productivity, and so it makes me feel better to work on something that will remedy the very thing that I'm freaking out about. angel_kaye13, TeaOverCoffee, BlinkedyLight and 7 others 10
angel_kaye13 Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 1 hour ago, pippi said: I'm already ridiculously proud of myself for all the work I did to apply. Anything that comes after is just super delicious icing on an empowerment cake. Everyone on these boards should be proud of themselves for applying! Plenty of people quit before they even take the GRE. ^THIS!!! a million times over!!! I bet you put forth your very best work, and my heart echoes that way: at the end of the day, what more could I have done that I didn't think I did? Rock on, all the way. We're all such dorks, in every good way. Thank goodness we don't obsess the same way, else we'd drive each other, and our people, batty! ;-) Dr. Old Bill, TeaOverCoffee and museum_geek 3
Abyss21 Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 35 minutes ago, JeremyWrites said: I'm one of those colossal dweebs who finds solace in productivity, and so it makes me feel better to work on something that will remedy the very thing that I'm freaking out about. That's literally me too. It's definitely better than wallowing in self-pity while I wait and letting my anxiety and self-doubt destroy my self-esteem and my nails. FeetInTheSky 1
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 22, 2017 Author Posted January 22, 2017 (edited) Out of upvotes for the last few, but yes...YES! We're definitely all in the same boat in this regard. With so many intangibles involved, it's impossible to be confident with one's application, but it IS possible to be confident in how effectively you prepared your own application (a subtle, yet crucial distinction). It might be the most amazing application in the world, and still not get you one of the rare slots, just because of factors you cannot possibly know. In other words, @angel_kaye13's infectious positivity rings the most true here. Whether any of us or all of us get in or not, most of us can take solace in the strength of our applications. It's a grueling process -- one that, like @Caien says, most people just don't understand. There's a lot of attrition along the way, and in a way it's just nutty that anyone even goes down this path in the first place. But we do, and that's something. Edited January 22, 2017 by Wyatt's Terps FeetInTheSky, Warelin, anon4now and 1 other 4
biyutefulphlower Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 I'm totally not reading all of these heartfelt posts close to midnight and getting emotional... But if I was, I'd have to say this whole process has been made easier by having such a great forum like this to read and participate in. Regardless of what happens, I am thankful for all the helpful information, suggestions, and the comradery. Thanks guys~ Dr. Old Bill 1
Warelin Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 Note to self: Reading this at midnight will make you have all the feels. You are only allowed to give reputation 5 times per day. You cannot give any more reputation today. And I've run out of upvotes for the day. First time I've run out within 5 mins.
anxiousphd Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 11 hours ago, JeremyWrites said: Enough time on this website has taught me that if you're sure of yourself, you're delusional. I mentioned this on the "waiting it out" board, but whenever I start to freak out I work on my "what if I don't get in plan." Rather than sitting at home and thinking about it, I actually have like a physical document of which steps to take, what jobs to apply for, which summer programs to consider, etc. So if the worst happens, I have an "in case of emergency break glass" document I'm one of those colossal dweebs who finds solace in productivity, and so it makes me feel better to work on something that will remedy the very thing that I'm freaking out about. SAME. I have back-up plans for my back-up plans. TeaOverCoffee 1
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 22, 2017 Author Posted January 22, 2017 12 hours ago, JeremyWrites said: Rather than sitting at home and thinking about it, I actually have like a physical document of which steps to take, what jobs to apply for, which summer programs to consider, etc. So if the worst happens, I have an "in case of emergency break glass" document 39 minutes ago, anxiousgrad said: SAME. I have back-up plans for my back-up plans. Gotta admit, I'm a tad envious of you both! I can't bring myself to think of plan B's just yet. I know in my heart of hearts that it would be very wise to do so, but I'm constantly blocked by the thought (okay, the hope) that it would ultimately be wasted effort. I wish it were otherwise... TeaOverCoffee 1
Yanaka Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 Working on planning my moving to the US, and naturally on my back-up plans. Honestly it feels good because I'm so scared of grad schools that my alternative options are to my liking too.
hmss9245 Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 @Wyatt's Terps Hope OSU's gonna prove very soon that you don't even need a Plan B~! and @Yanaka also wish you'd receive an email from Moi when you least expected to~(I know such joy kills sometimes xD) Though I'm relatively safe with my unofficial acceptance previously, I doubt if I could strain not shedding some tears if I happen to be rejected by both OSU and Duke … fingers crossed… Dr. Old Bill 1
Yanaka Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 57 minutes ago, hmss9245 said: @Wyatt's Terps Hope OSU's gonna prove very soon that you don't even need a Plan B~! and @Yanaka also wish you'd receive an email from Moi when you least expected to~(I know such joy kills sometimes xD) Though I'm relatively safe with my unofficial acceptance previously, I doubt if I could strain not shedding some tears if I happen to be rejected by both OSU and Duke … fingers crossed… Did you get something from Moi ? Congrats!
anon4now Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 I feel like the next seven days or so are going to be absolutely unbearable. Def. expecting decisions from 2 of my top choices this week (assume similar situation for others?) With that said: Remember to breathe. Our potential as future scholars is not predicated on our immediate admission into an M.A. or Ph.D. program. Success often demands patience, perseverance, and lots and lots of revisions. *sigh*
KikiDelivery Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 I just want to say that as a first year applicant, reading everyone's comments on the PhD process has been incredibly assuring. I am loving the solidarity, and hope that over the next couple of weeks we are all able to ground ourselves in our passions. TeaOverCoffee and anon4now 2
TeaOverCoffee Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 2 minutes ago, KikiDelivery said: I just want to say that as a first year applicant, reading everyone's comments on the PhD process has been incredibly assuring. I am loving the solidarity, and hope that over the next couple of weeks we are all able to ground ourselves in our passions. I completely agree. @Wyatt's Terps and I were discussing this last week. There is such a wonderful group here, and I'm very thankful to turn to you all. In my master's program, they're all saying, "I'll be surprised if you don't get into all of the schools you applied to." It's like they almost forgot how stressful and anxiety-inducing this process is. So I am very thankful for the group we have here. Dr. Old Bill and tvethiopia 2
tvethiopia Posted January 22, 2017 Posted January 22, 2017 2 hours ago, PoeticsofPossibility said: I feel like the next seven days or so are going to be absolutely unbearable. Def. expecting decisions from 2 of my top choices this week (assume similar situation for others?) i was just telling my husband the other day that this is going to be the first week that it would be totally reasonable and realistic to expect to hear something from the schools i've applied to. this is going to be a LONG week--and if i don't hear anything, i'm sure next week will be even longer. it's ok. we can do this. PetiteFilleNoire, Abyss21, Dr. Old Bill and 1 other 4
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 23, 2017 Author Posted January 23, 2017 tvethiopia, TeaOverCoffee, Caien and 3 others 6
hmss9245 Posted January 23, 2017 Posted January 23, 2017 7 hours ago, Yanaka said: Did you get something from Moi ? Congrats! Of course not~ was wishing you a potential Duker in addition to my wishing WT an OSUer;) We'll see how it turns out in just a few more days, I believe …
Yanaka Posted January 23, 2017 Posted January 23, 2017 12 hours ago, hmss9245 said: Of course not~ was wishing you a potential Duker in addition to my wishing WT an OSUer;) We'll see how it turns out in just a few more days, I believe … Sorry! Was a little confused by your first message! Or maybe I wanted to read too much into it Yeah I hope I'll have good news.... hmss9245 1
Caien Posted January 23, 2017 Posted January 23, 2017 Shoutout to the other international students counting down to 9am EST every day... eyeshadow, hmss9245, Abyss21 and 2 others 5
eyeshadow Posted January 23, 2017 Posted January 23, 2017 YEEEESSS 10 minutes ago, Caien said: Shoutout to the other international students counting down to 9am EST every day... Duke English was a huge surprise when the email arrived at around 5ish in the morning in my local time. I woke up in the middle of the night because of my email alarm (and also happened to be drunk at the time) but the result was a rejection and it hurt sooooooo much. I'm desperately hoping for any good news that will make me forget about my first experience with Duke.....
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