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Mathk1d

Posting your acceptance on facebook

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I think that it just seems rude to some people because some, like me, might be used to certain annoying people constantly putting their GPA or their acceptance stuff in their status updates. When I think of a person announcing an acceptance on Facebook, I automatically think of the conceited people I know who have done so in the least modest ways. But that doesn't mean that putting something about your acceptance up on Facebook is an inherently conceited thing to do. Just try to be polite about it. There's one person in particular who was accepted to an MBA program at a big name university and kept putting up constant irrelevant status updates mentioning that he had been accepted. That was annoying, especially because this happened when I and several other people we both know were still filling out applications. I don't think I'll personally post a status update about what I end up deciding to do next year, or where I get accepted. That's the kind of thing I'd rather tell people directly, instead of just launching it out to the whole world as an impersonal piece of information. But if I see posts by other people saying they are excited to have been accepted at X University, I won't be annoyed unless they go about it particularly tastelessly.

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I just don't see why the whole world needs to know someone's GPA. My friends and family don't even know my GPA. I guess it particularly annoyed me because people would post this stuff up while I was still finishing off my semester and was extremely stressed. To me, grades are like an academic salary, and like salaries, should generally be private. Being excited about doing well is understandable, but generally when I see a post saying "another 4.0 semester, aren't I awesome" it's clearly more intended to rub other people's faces in that person's success.

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I agree with Sparky and Fuzzylogician. Although, and I'm not sure if this was a dream or just some daytime delirium, but I was thinking...wouldn't it be kind of ridiculous if schools started notifying of admissions decisions via Facebook? The GradCafe results page would have entries like, "Accepted via Wall Post" or "I was Poked by my Top Choice. I checked my status on their website and I found out I was rejected."

I love this idea. Pretty sure it violates FERPA though lol. I definitely plan on posting my decision and probably any acceptances (should I get in) because I have a lot of family and friends who I don't see very often (but did see at Christmas or whatever) who are abreast of the situation (and have heard me complaining about random dreams, stressing, and completely freaking out about apps) and would want to know some good news. I don't have any fb friends that are applying to grad school this year, and even if I did, none of them are in my subfield, so it's not like I'd be all "nah nah nah nah I'm better than yoooouuuu." Besides, FB's status thing asks what's on your mind, and any acceptances would DEFINITELY be on my mind.

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I feel like in my FB situation, I can't post anything obvious. Because A) I have a cousin who's one of those FB users who likes to post "happy quotes" and doesn't care about anyone else except for herself. I have serious issues with her attitude and I don't really want her to post any comments after my status. She's a total fake.

With the new privacy settings, you could specifically exclude her from seeing the post. Or set her to permanently restricted access.

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To go back to the general topic, I believe there's a difference between bragging and merely celebrating your life, and I agree with those who referenced marriages, babies, etc. I don't feel the need to walk on eggshells, especially on MY facebook account. Don't want to see it? Have to make it about you instead of being happy for me? Then maybe we shouldn't be friends. I welcome your delete.

Edited by jordy

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To go back to the general topic, I believe there's a difference between bragging and merely celebrating your life, and I agree with those who referenced marriages, babies, etc. I don't feel the need to walk on eggshells, especially on MY facebook account. Don't want to see it? Have to make it about you instead of being happy for me? Then maybe we shouldn't be friends. I welcome your delete.

EXACTLY!

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If I didn't have Facebook friends applying to the same programs as me, I'd do it. If you're jealous that I get into a top program when you're not even applying there, then you're probably too much of a gunner to be my friend anyway :P

But on top of the people I already knew, I've been getting new Facebook friends from my interviews, since I've hit it off really well with two groups so far. If I get an acceptance somewhere, then I really don't want to be the guy who lets someone else know they were deferred or rejected... and likewise, I'd really rather hear about my rejection from the school than from my Facebook live feed.

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But on top of the people I already knew, I've been getting new Facebook friends from my interviews, since I've hit it off really well with two groups so far. If I get an acceptance somewhere, then I really don't want to be the guy who lets someone else know they were deferred or rejected... and likewise, I'd really rather hear about my rejection from the school than from my Facebook live feed.

Now I definitely agree with that particular exception. That's when I plan to bust out those sophisticated privacy settings. Out of respect, of course. ;)

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At this point, most of the people that I would want to share my excitement with are on Facebook, so I will definitely be posting about it. It won't be an update every time a school accepts or rejects me, but there are definite schools that everyone knows I'm excited/nervous for and I will keep them updated. I vented my frustrations with the application process via Facebook, so I don't see a need to stop now. Getting into graduate school is the major goal of my life right now, and if anyone begrudges me for making a post in celebration of meeting this massive goal, they're free to take me off their feed.

To echo other posters, I read every time a friend buys a house, or their kid does something, or they start a new job. I don't really see sharing the important aspects of my life any more obnoxious than that.

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Hell, my grad school acceptance was probably the most interesting post on my page in ages for a lot of my facebook friends. Otherwise, my page looks like:

[picture of cute kitten]

[video of cute kitten]

mudlark is so excited about working with archive materials in special collections!

[link to depressing Chronicle article about the job market]

mudlark is [insert joke that only humanities students will get]

[link to online database of historical literature]

[video of cute kitten]

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My mom and sister and my partner's parents went nuts on Facebook (their walls and mine) and let everyone else know before I had a chance to tell anyone outside of my immediate family. So, I wasn't even able to consider how I might slip the information in tactfully, or if I wanted to post it at all. Thanks, family.

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If you guys get accepted to your #1 Ph.D. program, will you notify everyone via your facebook status? One of my acquaintances posted that she got into her #1 program, and my personal reaction was that she's a conceited bitch! HAHA. Maybe because she actually is and that was just expressing her personality hehe

I have the same reaction to one of my colleagues. He's got perfect stats at a top-3 school, so he's getting in everywhere he applies. One announcement isn't such a big deal, but when he announces each one (along with funding info), it comes across as bragging.

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I agree with Sparky and Fuzzylogician. Although, and I'm not sure if this was a dream or just some daytime delirium, but I was thinking...wouldn't it be kind of ridiculous if schools started notifying of admissions decisions via Facebook? The GradCafe results page would have entries like, "Accepted via Wall Post" or "I was Poked by my Top Choice. I checked my status on their website and I found out I was rejected."

I think I'd love that! I already check Facebook every 5 minutes anyway!

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I applied to programs last year along with two classmates. We posted about all of our accepts/rejects, and I never had any hard feelings or thought they were bragging despite the fact that they both got into top tiers and I was left out in the cold.

This year, I'm applying again and I have received word that I will definitely be getting in with funding at one of my top choices. However, it was relayed to my advisor and not to me, and I have yet to receive my official letter. Obviously I am not so foolish as to post an acceptance before I have a letter in hand, but I see no problem in telling people privately. My advisor basically told everyone at school, thereby saving me any potential awkwardness, and I of course told my family. They posted it all over Facebook, and when I explained that it's not officially official yet and to please take it down, my mom actually refused, accusing me of being embarrassed by her!

Damn family.

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So far I have been posting status updates when I've gotten interviews. I expect that I will post status updates if/when I receive acceptances (at least for my top choices). I can understand why it might sound like bragging, but most of my facebook friends are close friends and/or family members who would hear about it anyway. As others on this forum have mentioned, I've read status updates about babies and weddings. I would like to get married and have babies someday, but that doesn't mean I'm jealous of these friends; I'm happy for them. This is what is going on in my life right now, and if they can't accept that and be happy for me then that is their problem.

(I will also note, that I do not know anyone else on facebook applying for PhD programs in ANY field)

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I think I'll definitely post something on my wall. Especially with all the waiting and uncertainty we've been living with, we need some definitive congrats! Plus, my absolute favorite thing is when you get emails with comments to a celebratory status. For example, I got about 50 instant emails when I posted my engagement, and it was the best feeling to think everyone was celebrating with me.

Of course, I think I'll post something tactful like "Smaudge knows what she wants to be when she grows up, and is on her way there!" And let my family do the boasting for me.

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I think that if i get accepted into my #1 choice school, i will definitely post something up like "yay i got in" but withhold the school name and I think that my closest friends and family will eventually asks me about it and it is then when I will reveal the school to them. I must admit I understand about wanting to post something this major to share with your friends and family and I see it on my friend's walls too like when they have their child, get married/engaged, buy a house, etc. but its posts like "ok i looked at my first house now" then 5 min later, "ok i am looking at my 2nd house" and then the next day "ok i am looking at my 3rd house" and then one month later "ok i am putting my bid down" then one week later "awww they rejected my bid" etc etc etc... i don't need to know what's going on every second but its nice when they finally got their first house after everything they've gone through. Its times like that I feel its appropriate to post on fb and let your friends celebrate with you.

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Yeah I actually posted my first acceptance on fb, but I kind of regretted it immediately afterwards, so I probably won't do it anymore.

If anything, the appearance of an extra network in the fall (hopefully one's top choice!) is probably the least abrasive way of actually letting everyone know where you're going, not necessarily where you've been accepted.

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I would definitely post where I got in and am going on FB. Unfortunately I dont know yet soooo, this is all theoretical.

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I posted mine! None of my friends applied to THIS school(and I'm not going to post about any schools that the only other person in my program is applying to. It was cool....my professors from my department and I are friends on fb...and all of them were immediately "liking" my status or commenting positively.

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Yeah I actually posted my first acceptance on fb, but I kind of regretted it immediately afterwards, so I probably won't do it anymore.

If anything, the appearance of an extra network in the fall (hopefully one's top choice!) is probably the least abrasive way of actually letting everyone know where you're going, not necessarily where you've been accepted.

Out of curiosity, what made you regret it so quickly?

When I got my first interview I immediately posted it; however, when I got an invitation for an interview at a top biostat program, I was much more hesitant. My SO asked why I hadn't posted it, and I couldn't come up with a good reason, so I did. After that initial hesitance, I didn't feel bad about it. (And even after my status was changed to something unrelated, several people were still commenting on the status asking about the top biostat program. So at this point I had stopped announcing it, but it was still being broadcast).

I understand that people will have different feelings on this, and have different experiences/styles of facebooking, but I was curious why you regretted so quickly.

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If you don't have any FB friends that are applying in the same discipline or same schools you're applying to, then I don't see any problem. My husband didn't post his acceptances last year, because he had many fellow grad students from his dept applying to the same schools.

I, for one, can't post absolutely anything, because I have to keep my full-time job until the summer, if I do get into any of the schools.

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