Sh*t people say when you are applying to grad school

[radiomars]

• "What a waste of your talents". Thanks, Grandpa.
  
• "You need to apply to medical school". Thanks, Dad.
  
• "You're only applying to four schools? Do you have any safeties?", not really understanding that there are no safeties.
  
• "What can you do with a PhD in anthropology?". I'm not sure what reply they want to hear here.
  
• "You're a shoo-in!", without knowing anything about the app process, my CV, or the schools I'm applying to.
  
• Anytime they hear anthropology, most people go off about ethnographies and rituals. There's more to anthro than sociocultural, people!
  
• Anytime they hear psychology, they assume I want to become a practicing psychiatrist.
  

[Bearcat1]

• "What a waste of your talents". Thanks, Grandpa.
  
• "You need to apply to medical school". Thanks, Dad.
  
• "You're only applying to four schools? Do you have any safeties?", not really understanding that there are no safeties.
  
• "What can you do with a PhD in anthropology?". I'm not sure what reply they want to hear here.
  
• "You're a shoo-in!", without knowing anything about the app process, my CV, or the schools I'm applying to.
  
• Anytime they hear anthropology, most people go off about ethnographies and rituals. There's more to anthro than sociocultural, people!
  
• Anytime they hear psychology, they assume I want to become a practicing psychiatrist.
  

My grandpa, who was a contractor, thinks I'm wasting my "talents" because I'm mildly handy and one time, under his tutelage, was able to repair some drywall. Everyone I know "knows" I'm getting into all nine programs to which I applied. Right. And I'll ride to my top choice on a unicorn, eating magical gumdrops. And everyone, people I know, people I don't, think I'm trying to be an artist. Even the people who know I don't have a creative bone in my body.

[HeatherC]

I know that I am so sick of hearing "Well how are you going to pay for that, you know that I don't have the money?" I just have to roll my eyes because there is so much more to it than just paying for it.

[ion_exchanger]

@ cherubie

 

My future conversation with this person (in my head, this is how it'll play out):
Me: Hey, I got into UCLA
Person:
Me: You mentioned you applied and didn't even get an interview right?...so....

I have a feeling this scenario won't happen either A) i won't get in or B ) I'm not that vindictive.

 

I hope that you get into UCLA, if for no other reason than to have this conversation. I have had similar conversations with my peers, who fail to realize that we are two different people with two different sets of stats.

Edited December 21, 2012 by ion_exchanger

[laura_b]

The one I get most often is, "Why would you want another master's degree?" I already have an MA and I'm applying to MFA programs. No one seems to understand the difference.

[PhDreams]

Friend: When do you find out if you get in?

 

Me: In about two months...

 

Friend: Wow. That's really soon.

 

Me: (smh) No...no, it's not. (On the inside: Gahhhhh! Why doesn't anyone understand?!?!)

[mostlytoasty]

on how long an English PhD takes:

 

me: "usually 5 or 6 years"

 

them:

*wide-eyed stare of disbelief*

 

 

YES, becoming a doctor of anything takes a long time. And people spend 5-6 years devoted to other things/finding themselves and no one ever seems THAT surprised. 

 

 

Also, one cousin (a doctor from Europe)

"Oh that should be a pretty easy program to get into."

Edited December 24, 2012 by mostlytoasty

[mop]

"If you got into every school today which would you go to?"

I just want to get into one school first

[epsilon]

Or parents saying "Well school X is ranked #10 in college rankings. Why wouldn't you go there?!"

[iloveyourneighborhood]

"What's a PhD?"

[WestCoast7]

"You will get into at least half" --this without knowing anything about your application from ad com after asking where you applied.

"When will you know?" family and friends.  

"I bet you are happy now that you are done with applications"     NO!

 

And the one I hate the most. "You can always retake the GRE" hahaha

 

 

Everyone you tell has something to say that really doesn't help. Why dont people reply with "oh I know someone who went to XYZ with similar stats. That would be nice.

[DaisyAdair]

I made it through Christmas without mentioning applications. Thankfully. But one of the few people who knows I am applying talked to me a few days ago commented, "Those writing samples are so important when applying to Rhet/Comp programs. If you don't nail that, you are doomed." Gee, thanks.

[Allouette]

DaisyAdair, you lucky duck. I felt like I was being questioned by the Spanish Inquisition at Christmas dinner.

My favourite was when someone said, "You're applying to Harvard? I didn't realize you were that smart! Congratulations!"

After trying to decide whether that was an insult or compliment, I replied "Oh ha ha don't congratulate me yet, I've just applied, anyone can apply."

To which I got the usual "Well I'm sure you'll get in you're a wonderful girl. It will be so lovely to have a Harvard student in the family." 

My eye twitched and on the inside I was like facepalm can I just go cry into my Christmas pudding yet please. 

[PhDreams]

My favourite was when someone said, "You're applying to Harvard? I didn't realize you were that smart! Congratulations!"

After trying to decide whether that was an insult or compliment, I replied "Oh ha ha don't congratulate me yet, I've just applied, anyone can apply."

To which I got the usual "Well I'm sure you'll get in you're a wonderful girl. It will be so lovely to have a Harvard student in the family." 

 

LOL When friends and family make Harvard a part of an adjective... "Harvard smart." ahahahaha

As in "I didn't know you were 'Harvard smart.'"

 

Friends and family are the BEST.

[psychdork]

Last year I didn't want everyone knowing that I was applying, so I only told a few people (including my parents).  Now, I never told my parents that I was keeping it quiet (not like they would listen if I did) but since I never got any questions about it from other family/friends I just figured they never told anyone.  So around mid-March last year, I'm sitting at a family party and the following conversation occurs:

 

Cousin (loudly): "So I hear you are moving to Pennsylvania!?!".  

Me: No...where did you hear that?

Cousin: "My dad said that you are moving there, he heard it from your dad."

Me: "What?  I'm not moving to Pennsylvania.  Why would he say that?"

Cousin:  "He said you're going there for grad school."

Me: "You mean because I applied to Penn State?  I just applied that's all!  I applied to a lot of schools all over the country."

Cousin:  "Oh, well my dad is telling everyone you are going there."

Me: *sigh*

Aunt (laughing): "You know how he always gets everything confused!"

 

That was fun to work out.

[DaisyAdair]

Nice, psychdork. I bet that was fun to straighten out.

[R Deckard]

My advisor: "If this was Vegas and I had to put money down I'd say you'll get into at least 3 programs you applied to"

Me: "Which ones?"

My advisor: "Oh, that's impossible to tell"

Me: "Dude, this ain't Vegas"

My advisor: "That's true.."

Me: "I'm applying to SUNY Stony Brook"

Thesis committee member: "Now you're gonna have to get used to riding that damn train to NYC every weekend..."

Me: "..."

 

This reminds me of a conversation I had with a (foreign) professor about grad school once:

 

Her: "So have you heard back from grad schools yet?"

...

Me: "I also got into Stony Brook"

Her: "Really!? That's in New York City!"

Me: "It's actually in Long Island and isn't really that close to NYC"

Her: "The greatest city in the world!"

Me: "..."

[Quant_Liz_Lemon]

Me: I'm applying to quantitative psychology programs. Her: So you're interested in Frued and psychoanalyses? Me: [cringe] Oh no, quant psych is more like applied statistics. Her: ... Me: Frued is more qualitative psych and psychiatry. I like using math.

[Althonse]

Everyone ever: Oh, where are you applying?

Me: .....a lot of places...

 

Do people expect you to rattle off the whole list? I highly doubt it....why do they even ask?

[foreverfree]

^this... 

 

also:

"didn't you apply to any safeties?" 

me: ... 

 

and has been said before:

"oh so you don't want to get a real job" 

[beyondaboundary]

My personal favourite...

 

Them: So where are you applying?

Me: (beginning litany): UC Davis, Minne...

Them: California, you look like California...it won't be a problem...you're as good as in

[brandonsimpson]

If I get accepted, I'll be the first in my family to try to pursue a Master's (and eventually/hopefully a Ph.D.). The most common question I get is how I'm going to pay for it. This is usually from my mother. It doesn't occur to her, and others, that grad students are typically paid a stipend.

 

Then there's always the explanation I have to give about linguistics. "Oh, you want to be a translator?"

 

I just give up and say I'm going for an MA in Spanish, which is sort of true. I applied to an MA program in Hispanic Linguistics.

[CrayolaKate]

Dad- "When you get in I'm coming to visit you and go to football games!"

Me- "I wouldn't get ahead of ourselves here..."

My dad leans over to my uncle..."Do you want to come to the game? We can pick a weekend and fly out there?"

Uncle-"Yeah I want to go! There are a lot of cool things to do there too."

Mom- "We should all go! It will be so much fun." 

Me-"I'm not in yet. I turned my application in nine days ago. I may not get in."

 

Everybody just stared at me like I had interrupted their plans. I really want to get in but if I don't, at least I'll get some weird sense of satisfaction out of ruining their plans.

[nohika]

Mom: "I'm sure you'll get in everywhere. They're gonna fight over you."

Me: "Well...not really. I have decent research, but not the greatest GPA..."

Mom: "Why don't you apply to [neighboring-state-school]?"

Me: "Well, they don't really have anyone with the same research focus that I do."

Mom: "That's why you should apply! They don't have anyone like you! You're different! Unique! Trust me, you'll be a shoe-in."

Me: "..."

 

We've had this conversation a million times. I did end up finding a professor that matched my interests and would be okay there, but the other schools have better research fits for me (explaining the whole research-fit thing was a NIGHTMARE).

 

My mentor is at least realistic (more concerned about funding than acceptance)...but oh! Some other gems, when it comes to PhDs:

 

Student: "So what do you want to do when you graduate?"

Me: "Well...I'd like to go to grad school and become a professor."

Student: "Oh my gosh, do you know they have to do RESEARCH? And like sit at a desk the whole time? Having a desk job sounds horrid."

Me: "Well...I generally work on qualitative research, and do interviews and stuff, so.."

Student: "Well, graduate school doesn't really sound that hard. I could get in if I tried. The professors that tell us that it's hard are liars. They hate me - that's why my grades are bad."

Me: "...well you do that."

 

Another student:

 

Me: "-explaining about research fit, etc-"

Student: "...why do you worry about that, anyways? Couldn't you just lie on your application and say you want to study something?"

Me: "...well...yes, you could say you want to study A when you don't want to..."

Student: "I'll just do that, then."

 

-facepalm- The professors at my university are heavily research-involved (and those who get involved with the profs are too, but there's not many of us). Some students, though...ack. How do they /live/.

[PhDreams]

Another student:

 

Me: "-explaining about research fit, etc-"

Student: "...why do you worry about that, anyways? Couldn't you just lie on your application and say you want to study something?"

Me: "...well...yes, you could say you want to study A when you don't want to..."

Student: "I'll just do that, then."

 

But then... you'd... have.... to... do... that... research... lololololololol

:facepalm: