Sh*t people say when you are applying to grad school

[crazygirl2012]

Roommate: "Your program is funded, right?"

Me: "Yep."

Roommate: "That's nice. How much are they offering you?"

Me: "Enough."

Roommate: "Have you started looking at apartments yet?"

Me: "Yeah, I'm pretty sure I know which apartment complex I'll choose."

Roommate: "How much will your rent be?"

Me: "Affordable."

Roommate: "Under or over $500?"

Me: "Affordable."

Things I hate: Talking about money with this particular roommate.

Things I love: Driving him crazy by casually refusing to do it.

[oseirus]

If there was a thread for "$*** people say on gradcafe" there would've been a strew of "OMG what's going on w/the site?!?!" and " I WANT MY GRADCAFE BACK!!!!" etc ... and I'm not going to say definitively who all were saying these things ... just know that it occurred

[-hermes-]

"Why didn't you apply to Columbia?"

Sigh. Maybe because Columbia doesn't have what I want to study?

[Cockneysparrow]

I got quite mixed reactions after I had announced that I wanted to apply to a PhD programme abroad. I had to laugh at some of the questions / comments. I didn't list my parents' comments because they were very supportive. So were my supervisors.

Before:

1. "Are you applying to US universities because you are not smart enough to do it your own country?" (from a friend)

2. "Do you honestly believe that you'll have a chance THERE? You at least should speak English. Once you visit the US and talk to real people, you'll realise that the English you speak is not "real" English." (from some know-it-all distant relatives)

3. "You'll get in anywhere because you're smart and you enjoy studying." (from grandparents)

4. "I respect you for having a keen interest in something, but you should start thinking about doing something useful and make a contribution to society." (from a friend)

5. Aaah...you're applying to some no-name universities because it's too difficult for you to keep up with the competition at your current uni. (from an acquaintance - for the record, the "no-name" universities are some top-ranked universities)

After:

5. "What are you going to do with a PhD in linguistics? Are you going to teach English?" (from lots of people)

6. "These young people today...they keep studying until the age of 30 and let their parents support them." (from my mother's colleagues - They can't be bothered by the fact that I've been supporting myself for a long time.)

7. "You'd better stay at home with your parents and get married in your village and earn little money than go abroad and make more money." (from my grandma)

8. "Are you sure you wanna go there? You'll be looked down on by other people there." (from some acquaintances)

9. "How could you convince ***insert top-ranked US university*** to accept YOU? (I get asked this a lot)

Edited April 8, 2012 by Cockneysparrow

[civicblade]

Hi Cockneysparrow,

Where do you hail from?

Your use of the term "no-name" universities sounds familiar....

[oseirus]

"Why didn't you apply to Columbia?"

Sigh. Maybe because Columbia doesn't have what I want to study?

followed by "well why don't they!"

[gellert]

Old man friend: So, are you going to get your Masters?

Me: Actually, I'm planning on going straight for the Ph.D.

Old man friend: Why would you do that? Why wouldn't you get a Masters?

Me: Well, because I want to be a professor and do research, and that requires a Ph.D.

Old man friend: Well, I hear Masters are in pretty high demand these days. Maybe you should get a Masters.

Me: I think a Ph.D. is more useful for what I'm hoping to do, and it entails a Masters....

Old man friend: Well, you should get a Masters instead. You won't be able to get a job if you don't get a Masters.

Me: I already have a job in my field.

Old man friend: Oh. Well, you should still get a Masters.

[koolherc]

This isn't an experience about what was said to me when applying forgrad studies, but I had a similar experience where I didn't "look" the part.

It happened when I was leading a group of undergraduates to another classroom for an exam after we had been kicked out by an old grumpy professor who didn't care that my graduate supervisor had booked this room months before so that the class could be split up while writing the exam.. (a different story).

On my way to the other classroom (where the professor had the rest of the undergraduate group writing the exam) I heard a voice shouting down the hall behind the line of us asking, where is your grad assistant/ are you the g.a?

This was asked to the tallest person in the group, an undergraduate who was 17 years old.

I was the shortest person in the group (and 26 years old), but I guess, I didn't look the part...

(the question intended for me being that another room had been found that we could use to remain in the split two groups).

I occasionally teach at a non-profit prep program for high schoolers and I get confused for a student all the time. I'm 26.

[-hermes-]

followed by "well why don't they!"

I wish. Followed by "Are you sure?? But it's an Ivy League school!"

[FoggyAnhinga]

So it was like late January (2012) and people asked:

People: Hey! Did you hear back from your schools??

Me: No, it's still too early.

And then, it was early February. More people asked:

People: Yo!!! Have you heard back from your schools???

Me: NO. TOO EARLY. YOU'VE ALREADY ASKED ME THAT LESS THAN TWO WEEKS AGO.

Oh, here's probably THE MOST ridiculous and naive suggestion anyone has ever made during application process (back in late November 2011):

Postdoc: I strongly recommend you to attend the "name" schools. After all, you do notice that the majority of faculty have post-baccalaureate degrees from these institutions (I'm thinking, uh no, not exactly).

Me: LOL, as great as these "name" schools might be, none of them offer PhD degrees on programs I'm interested in.

Postdoc: Yes, but still, I strongly encourage you to attend these "name" schools if you can, because I guarantee you will not have any problems finding job anywhere.

Me: *Silently shaking my head, restraining myself from facepalm, and invisibly rolling my eyes*

By then I was on verge of retorting back to him "even if I REALLY wanted to go to these schools, I'm not the one who decides on my acceptance", but I decided against it.

Stuff that people say without ANY thought really annoys me during the application processes...

Edited April 9, 2012 by FoggyAnhinga

[imonedaful]

I occasionally teach at a non-profit prep program for high schoolers and I get confused for a student all the time. I'm 26.

A police came through my apartment complex one time and I happen to be just walking down the sidewalk and he motioned to me. I looked around, knowing I wasn't doing anything wrong walking to my mailbox at my own apartment complex. He asked me how old I was so he could make sure I wasn't a high school kid skipping school. I had to refrain from telling him that I most likely had more degrees than he did.

[sociologo]

I get asked for my ID when buying 5 hour energy things.... I didn't even realize those were restricted at all.

[stell4]

Last year I was a teacher in a large high school that constantly had new security guards (quite a turnover rate), countless times I was told I was tardy, yelled at to get back to class, asked to see a hall pass, and once one would not let me in the building before school even after I showed him my teacher ID card! Eventually one of my students vouched for me, not sure how that's better than my ID, and he let me in.

[sansao]

I love the confidence my friends have in my ability to get in somewhere, but then when the rejection comes, it was somehow "expected."

[new_to_kin]

I am so sick of hearing this. I think a lot of it comes because I am changing fields. Plus a lot of musicians would love to get out of music and can't believe my luck.

"What? They let YOU in? How?"

"Well you do know you'll have to do anatomy and stuff!". Um yes.

"How on earth do you think you'll do that?"

"You'll have soooo much catching up to do". Yes. I know.

"Do they know you only have a Masters in Music?" Yes. They know. I did not lie on my application. However, I did get straight As in my Masters.

[oseirus]

"What? They let YOU in? How?"

ahhh the old classical "eff you"

[FoggyAnhinga]

Another thing that really annoys me is this advice:

"Throughout your graduate studies in science, you have to accept the fact that there are more no's than yes's." Way to be uplifting, seriously...

Yes, I realized that just based on the competition for grad school admissions, but it's absolutely not necessary to repeat that advice to me over and over again

[reachystik]

You shouldn't go off to grad school, you don't need more education.

Why not?

Because look at all of the debt you have already! Why would you want to add to it?? You can totally get a job now, look at me, I am working to pay off my debt!

But you work as a secretary for a veterinarian, have a diploma in fashion arts and still live with your parents.

So? You can probably get your job back at the gas station and then we can hang out more!!! The gas station will definitely hire you with just a bachelors degree, you don't need your masters for that!!

blank...stare...

[oseirus]

You shouldn't go off to grad school, you don't need more education.

Why not?

Because look at all of the debt you have already! Why would you want to add to it?? You can totally get a job now, look at me, I am working to pay off my debt!

But you work as a secretary for a veterinarian, have a diploma in fashion arts and still live with your parents.

So? You can probably get your job back at the gas station and then we can hang out more!!! The gas station will definitely hire you with just a bachelors degree, you don't need your masters for that!!

blank...stare...

What gas station do they know ... you def need at least 2 PhDs and a post doc fellowships at my gas station!

[sansao]

What gas station do they know ... you def need at least 2 PhDs and a post doc fellowships at my gas station!

"The ideal candidate will have advanced degrees in both petroleum engineering and marketing, as well as 387 years experience in one or both fields."

[reachystik]

"The ideal candidate will have advanced degrees in both petroleum engineering and marketing, as well as 387 years experience in one or both fields."

It was a cashier job at the gas station I had when I was in high school. It's the reason I left that town....went to school...and still...go to school....

[Revo]

"The ideal candidate will have advanced degrees in both petroleum engineering and marketing, as well as 387 years experience in one or both fields."

At least they let you combine experience in both fields....

[psychgurl]

reachystik: i luv your kitteh buddy icon!

[BigTexan]

I hear alot of... "well they would be crazy not to accept you"

and... "I'm sure you'll have all the programs you want to choose from, you'll see".

and... "I just don't understand why you didn't get in!"

but my favorite is... "whatever happens will be the best option for you. Everything happens for a reason."

Maybe I should put that on my resume under education, "everything happens for a reason"

[oseirus]

but my favorite is... "whatever happens will be the best option for you. Everything happens for a reason."

blame television