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Sh*t people say when you are applying to grad school


Clou12

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Me: "I got into School A's PhD program!"

Someone I know (not really a friend): "School A?? I thought you wanted to go to school B? Where is school A anyway?"

Is it REALLY THAT HARD to say a simple "congrats" first, before bombarding me with those questions????

Edited by FoggyAnhinga
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  • 4 weeks later...

After 6 months of combing through 120 programs in my field, narrowing by research fit, seeking advice from trusted people in my field, contacting professors, and being a complete and utter bore to anyone who made the mistake of asking about "the list" - it's done. Which is why I am shocked and amazed that now, after hearing me prattle on for months, those near and dear to me have begun sprinkling conversations with:

"well have you considered school GYFHJKJH (which doesn't do anything like what I do)"

to which I'm forced to reply "yeah, but, you know, great school - just not what I want to do"

to which the inevitable reply is, "well they have a great program in isduhisduhf (thing unrelated to me)"

I appreciate the support of course. But why must it be now, when I have bored myself with my own nitpicking, when the list is formalized, when I can put those dark days of list-uncertainty behind me? Now is the time for meaningless application talk, essay revisions, selecting letter writers! I can only assume my friends and family have had a peak into this even duller world of approaching conversation and suddenly dream-school-talk seemed fun and fancy free by comparison.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'm applying to at least 5 schools for Fall 2013--4+ in the US and one in Canada. When people outside of my field hear that McGill is one of my top choices, I tend to get:

1. I bet the election will affect your decision, then. Haha. (I understand the "liberals talking about moving to Canada after an election year" joke. I just wish everyone who brought it up didn't think they were being sooo funny and original.)

2. What's wrong with schools in the US? (Nothing is wrong with schools in the US. I did my BA and am doing my MA at US schools. I'm also applying mostly to PhD programs in the US....and one in Canada.)

3. Ugh. Americans romanticize Canada so much. You know, we have problems with the economy/international relations/racism/homophobia and transphobia/etc., too! (I know. I'm not looking at McGill because I believe Canada is a magical sparkly land of equality and liberalness that has solved all of the problems with which the US struggles. I just...like the musicologists I've corresponded with at McGill, think they have interesting programs that could support the research I want to do, and could see myself living in Montreal.)

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  • 2 weeks later...

The one that infuriates me the most: "5 - 6 years? ...But you're going to work while you're in school right?" I swear, it's like all my family cares about is 'working.' And yet, when I explain that I could probably get funding, they still don't get it.

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  • 2 months later...

I never expected this, but I've been getting this a lot since living in the UK:

Them (disdainfully): Why go back to the US for a decade-long PhD when it only takes you four years to do one here?

Me: Because if I do it, I'll be paid to do it.

Them: ... oh.

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"A PhD will take you how long?!?? You know you could be a 'real' doctor in the same amount of time!"

Yes!!! Thank you!!! Getting my PhD in art history was actually just about how much time it will take, but since you've explained to me that I could be an MD in the same amount of time, that does seem like a much better plan.

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Them: "So you're graduating this year? What are you going to do after you graduate?"

Me: "Well, if all goes according to plan, graduate school."

Them: "Oh, what do you want to study?"

Me: "I want to get my PhD in computer science with a focus on artificial intelligence and robotics."

Them: 0_0

Them: "...So like Terminator and stuff?"

Me: Sigh...

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People keep telling me, "You'll get in somewhere."

For some reason that just makes me more frustrated and doesn't comfort me at all.

So since I have no time to make a video about this. Plus there like a million videos about what "people say" on YouTube. Care to share what people have been saying to you? Just for humor folks :D

I hear You'll get in somewhere from time to time.

My mom, who lives on the other side of the country from me, has no idea how the application process works. She periodically tells me to go to the local UC, which is an excellent school/program, as if all I have to do is just show up and start attending classes.

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A few weeks after I told my Mom I wanted to go to grad school, I was watching reruns of an old tv show.

Mom: "Are you getting your PhD because <character on tv show> got her PhD?"

Me: (in my head) Yes, Mom, I've decided to spend 5+ years of my life in grad school because she did. Obviously I couldn't have made this decision for any other reason...

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My PI is obviously a really smart dude and is very well regarded in our field but he's, uh, a bit out of touch when it comes to the admissions process.

PI: Well you have great grades and GRE scores, great research and some publications, awesome letters of rec--especially the one from me, mwhaha--but I really think you should work here for a few more years and get some first author papers if you want a decent chance of getting into grad school.

Me: uhhh

Eavesdropping labmates: *raucous laughter*

Edited by dendy
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I have also found it annoying, but interesting, that some responses are based solely on images and stereotypes of the [usually undergraduate] college/university.

Wait, why are you applying to Brown? That is Ivy League, you grew up working-class. They look down on people like you. Why don't you go to a state university, you know, something more blue-color. :rolleyes:

Or,

That school has major athletics programs, and you know, is a jock school. You don't want a future employer to see that you went there, you want them to see that you went somewhere that was academically challenging [for non-jocks].

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Them: "So you're graduating this year? What are you going to do after you graduate?"

Me: "Well, if all goes according to plan, graduate school."

Them: "Oh, what do you want to study?"

Me: "I want to get my PhD in computer science with a focus on artificial intelligence and robotics."

Them: 0_0

Them: "...So like Terminator and stuff?"

Me: Sigh...

Hahahaha, such a great line :P You can't blame the public.

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Even though I have not gotten in anywhere my girlfriend is giving me trouble because she is certain I am going to get in somewhere, and the relationship is over if I have to move. Its gonna be a fun 3 months

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Even though I have not gotten in anywhere my girlfriend is giving me trouble because she is certain I am going to get in somewhere, and the relationship is over if I have to move. Its gonna be a fun 3 months

Because you need that stress on top of the anxiety over hearing back from schools. I'm sorry. :unsure:

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yeah that's too bad... unless you told her the relationship would be over if you have to move..

anyway, the thing that bothers me the most is hearing, 'it's ok, if you don't get accepted it just means you weren't meant to get a phd and you can move on and find something else to do with your life'.

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