Sh*t people say when you are applying to grad school

[rustledjimmies]

Possibly by waiting for them to give them any news concerning interviews first.

I assume "how are you feeling about the process" is the standard question, while the interview question is reserved for those who have chosen to disclose such information.

Edit:grammar

Good, point..

 

I guess I just feel like all grad school application related questions are isomorphic to each other, in that they all evoke the same emotion from me. Doesn't matter if someone asks "how are you feeling about the process" or "where have you heard from yet", My first thought is how much I wish i had heard something back from schools. 

[Linelei]

Possibly by waiting for them to give them any news concerning interviews first.

I assume "how are you feeling about the process" is the standard question, while the interview question is reserved for those who have chosen to disclose such information.

Edit:grammar

 

That is exactly right. For example, when my friend tells me she is going out of town for interviews, I might later ask about said interviews. My point is, when I talk with my friends, I try to keep the conversation off the accepted/not accepted part, and on to things that we (as applicants) have more power over. I don't think it's really fair to want everyone around me to not talk about grad school, and I imagine most of us don't actually want that. Rather, we hate feeling powerless, and would rather talk about how much we liked the campus at a school than whether we've heard anything. At least that's how my friends and I feel.

Edited March 3, 2013 by Linelei

[jmu]

Since most of these are negative/cynical/ambivalent, here is a positive one:

 

I presented at a conference this weekend and a member of the adcomm at a school I applied to approached me; she recognized my name from my name tag. I talked to her for a minute about the school and its financial situation before she said "I loved your application. You're going to be a fantastic geographer."

 

After hearing a bunch of weird/negative things over the past few weeks, it's nice to be recognized.

[RiseofthePhoenix]

In retrospect, all the annoying people who kept saying "you'll get in somewhere" were right

Edited March 3, 2013 by RiseofthePhoenix

[Inyo]

Said to me frequently in the fall: "I can't imagine that you won't get in everywhere that you applied."

 

My response was generally "Have you ever applied for PhD?"

[Reatha]

One of my favorites recently...

 

"Dude why didn't you apply to Texas AM?! That's where Johnny Manziel plays!" (QB football)

 

lol, that's where I did my undergrad...He's kinda awesome

[Reatha]

Since most of these are negative/cynical/ambivalent, here is a positive one:

 

I presented at a conference this weekend and a member of the adcomm at a school I applied to approached me; she recognized my name from my name tag. I talked to her for a minute about the school and its financial situation before she said "I loved your application. You're going to be a fantastic geographer."

 

After hearing a bunch of weird/negative things over the past few weeks, it's nice to be recognized.

 

May I ask what you mean by the school's financial situation?

 

Do you mean the budget cuts on capital hill?

[batcathat]

One of my favorites recently...

 

"Dude why didn't you apply to Texas AM?! That's where Johnny Manziel plays!" (QB football)

 

Similarly, I told one of my guy friends I applied to U Mass- Amherst. His response?

"If you got in you'd have to go, cause that's where John Calipari [u Kentucky basketball coach] started coaching basketball at!"

 

Because obviously the most important criteria for choosing a program in anthropology is whether or not John Calipari used to coach there.

 

Sports people, I just don't understand them.

[StenderB]

If my wonderful husband tells me ONE MORE TIME that "it will all work out" I'm going to have to demote him from partner to grit under my heel.  HA!  

 

I internally know it will, but it doesn't help me to hear that... while I'm sitting on NO communication thus far beyond "apps complete" or "notifications will begin mid-march" ... 

Omg I know this one all.too.well.

He means well, but when I'm manic over some formatting errors in my app I turned in and now trying to decide how to format my stipend application you can't just say "you're a great writer. they don't care if it's single-spaced".

BUT I CAN'T HAVE MY FORMATTING LOOK UNPROFESSIONAL OR STUPID AND THINGS DON'T "JUST WORK OUT". lol

Sigh, he's still my best friend.

[SLPjmar]

"Oh, you haven't heard yet? That must be bad..."

 

No, usually we don't start hearing back until March. Thanks for the vote of confidence. 

[AnonymousAcademic]

I get asked all the time when will I hear, and although I have heard back from one so far (wait-listed), I haven't told the majority of my family or my in-laws that decision or that I have applied out of town. 

 

My husband and I just had our first baby in September, and if I got in out of town, we'd be moving a 2days drive away. I'm waiting to find out if I get in before I tell others, ESPECIALLY my mother-in-law, that I've applied out of town. She would flip out on me for sure. I can just imagine what she'd say if I told her I applied out of town... I think I'd get every response listed here!

 

Good luck to everyone!

[queenleblanc]

"Oh, you haven't heard yet? That must be bad..."

 

No, usually we don't start hearing back until March. Thanks for the vote of confidence. 

OMG I just heard that yesterday... I had to reassure the person that this was normal to wait so long. I still don't know if I have reassured myself of that same fact.

[jmu]

May I ask what you mean by the school's financial situation?

 

Do you mean the budget cuts on capital hill?

 

It's a public university so their internal funding has been cut repeatedly the past few years. There aren't as many long-term, high dollar research projects in human geography and those that do exist are usually really expensive to run so the money isn't used as much to fund grad students as it is to cover travel and research expenses.

[midwestgirl]

Incessant inquiries from friends and family "Have you heard back!?" "Where are you moving!?"  (I've been living in HI and they are beyond excited that I'll be back in the midwest)  Like I'm keeping it from them, just for fun. 

[nope]

"You interviewed there right? Oh, you'll definitely get in then!"

[Reatha]

In retrospect, all the annoying people who kept saying "you'll get in somewhere" were right

 

If only... I got two more rejections today, and for the record, I'm not going to Atlanta...

 

When I said this to one of my co workers he said "I would let you in with out even looking at the application. I would just know."

 

Thanks, but I'd like to think some form of logic goes into these decisions...

[pears]

Similarly, I told one of my guy friends I applied to U Mass- Amherst. His response?

"If you got in you'd have to go, cause that's where John Calipari [u Kentucky basketball coach] started coaching basketball at!"

 

Because obviously the most important criteria for choosing a program in anthropology is whether or not John Calipari used to coach there.

 

Sports people, I just don't understand them.

 

i consider myself a sports person, but i don't really understand some sports people, either! i guess that means i'm more of an archaeology person than a sports person, haha! i wonder whether someone talking smack about my favorite teams or someone claiming aliens are responsible for various ancient structures would tick me off more...

[callista]

I'm the first to attend and graduate college from my family, so my dear mother doesn't realize how difficult and selective this process is. When I got my first rejection she just casually stated:

 

"Oh, so they actually look at the applications and deny people?" 

 

Got this from a family member recently.  It doesn't help that their spouse just got an online master's.  I should be able to just sign up for a PhD, right?

[CStJ]

"So is that, like, another degree?"

 

 

"You're applying to America? Why?"

"Because they have some good universities there."

"Are you applying to Harvard then? Or that one Brian from Family Guy goes to? Brown or something?"

"No, I'm not."

"Oh.... So you're just applying to the shit ones then?"

 

"Oh is that that GRE thing you were going on about for ages?"

 

"Are American Unis not really expensive?"

 

 

 

 

 

[Allouette]

A friend just announced that everyone she knows got into my top choice. Knowing full well that I haven't heard back from them. Welp, now I feel like shit. 

[Maggi]

This comes from my husband, who has also applied to the PhD program, I dont understand how he manages to keep so calm! - "Why do you keep checking thegradcafe.com a gazillion times a today??! Thats not going to help you get in anywhere. You cant do much about your admissions now" 

I love that guy, but its kinda irritating 

[callista]

A friend just announced that everyone she knows got into my top choice. Knowing full well that I haven't heard back from them. Welp, now I feel like shit. 

 

 Ouch!

[EdYouKateOr]

A friend just announced that everyone she knows got into my top choice. Knowing full well that I haven't heard back from them. Welp, now I feel like shit. 

[girlegirl]

Love the idea of this topic! Throughout this whole experience (its my second year applying to phd programs in psychology), Ive learned that those who have not applied to PhD programs will never understand how grueling and exhausting the process can be. Its extensive, requires a lot of effort, organization, meticulous planning, preparation, persistence and hard work! Only the tough survive. I have found that the best thing you can do after you turn in your applications is to turn to people who do understand your plight. Thats why I have a select group of supportive people in my life who DO understand this situations and will respect and understand my many mood swings during this crucial yet sensitive period in my life. 

  

O Where shall I start....

 

Older sister:   "It's not the end of the world, I wouldn't stress" and quickly changes the subject

Mother: "Wait, don't you need a master's degree first before you get your PhD?"

Boyfriend:  "You have a compelling background and demonstrated ability, why wouldn't you get in?"

Friend:  "Don't get frustrated, go jogging like I do"

One of my letter writers/Experimental Psychologist:  "You have good credentials, you will get in somewhere"

Best Friend/Pharmacist, Pharm.D.:  "I only applied to one PhD program and I got in. So if you're applying to 7 programs....."

Mother:  "Oh well, life goes on"

Mentor/Clinical Psychologist:  "Always have your Plan B ready"

Older sister:  "Keep applying and eventually you will be get in"  like I have the rest of my life to pursue this??!!

Older sister:  "...and connections are everything!!"  She majored in international relations and spent her graduate school years partying it up in NYC with other party animals. She thinks academia is about "connections" rriiiiiiiggghhht. 

 

And the number #1 most annoying saying:     "You will get in somewhere and you know it!"

 

[whuems]

So how is your application? ... Still no offer!!!???...Oh, sorry