Need Coffee in an IV

Or at the very least frats that don't shoot off fireworks at 2 AM on a random Tuesday!

Hey I'm bumping this thread! My boyfriend and I are most likely moving to Lubbock for my MA. We are young but we don't want to be surrounded by undergrads. We also would like a quite and safe neighborhood. We are looking to rent a house. Any recommendations? Also how is the pace of life? We would think it would be slower, which is what we want. How's the overall vibe of the culture? Does the city feel safe and friendly? We are mainly democratic when it comes to social issues (lgbt rights, pro-choice, anti religious laws) but aren't organizing rallies. Thanks for any answers!

Everyone's family is different but I can tell you about my family. I'm now 22 and out of my whole life my parents have lived together (in the same house) for 2 years. Even now that my dad is retired, he lives in Florida while my mom is working in DC. Everyone assumes my parents are divorced but they are happily married! I turned out ok! But just know if being long distance is whats best, that doesnt make you a bad parent.

I've been keeping my letters updated as well, I asked them if they would be my references again if this season didn't end so well. They said sure! No one should be embarrassed, even though that's easier said than done. I think the reason why I wasn't embarrassed was because I saw my friends who graduated before me get rejected. And these people have a much better gpa than me and have actual research ha. So its really a combination of things!

My boyfriend and I were long distance for 6 months when he went to grad school. He decided that grad school wasn't for him, so he came back. We decided that we will not do long distance again so he's been waiting to apply for jobs until I decide where I want to go for grad school. It's looking like Texas though! I would have to say it sucked at first but got a little better. The way we did it, was we talked over skype at least 2-3 hours per week and casually emailed throughout the day. We also had set dates for when we would visit each other. So we basically made time for each other.

@MichiganAbe Good luck and enjoy Seattle! It's one of my favorite cities.

@MarineBluePsy Exactly my point! I tried explaining the difference between a cross-body and a tote. I saw his eyes glaze over and knew he was gone haha. @sjoh197 Tbh I haven't missed the disposal that much. I would love a washer/dryer but its not a deal breaker! We do have a deck and we look out onto trees. We are going to miss this apartment. Its a nice size and has a lot of windows. We are able to hear the birds and feel a cool breeze. Now if only we can make this into a house and transport it to Lubbock. I'm sure I could convince Pixar to help out ha

Haha my boyfriend says I have clothes that are the exact same throughout my closet, but in my defense there is a difference between brown oxfords and brown heels! I haven't heard of those, I need to check them out.

My place doesn't have a garbage disposal. I just make sure I wipe everything into the trashcan, I live in an old duplex so it makes sense I don't have one. And tbh I wouldn't want a capsule wardrobe. But I love picking out what I'm going to wear. Clinton Kelly from What Not to Wear is one of my favorite celebrities.

I would imagine! We are meh about having kids so our lifestyle can easily be supported. I would have to say The Gap has nice jeans, durable and they are often on sale. I use rubber gloves so my hands don't dry out but I get pain in my wrists. No idea why, I've asked my doctor about it. She thinks I put pressure on them, so I usually have to have breaks.

haha I'll be living the high life! Washing dishes hurts my hands, so my boyfriend is willing to set that as a requirement. We have to go to a laundry mat but we usually spend only 5-15 a month.

Ha that's what my boyfriend says too! He teases me because before he met me, he would hand wash all of his clothes. We can afford smaller salaries since neither of us have debt and are relatively money conscious. Luckily for us, the things we like are usually free. But next place we are getting will have a dish washer! That's a non negotiable.

They are giving me some funding and I may receive more! I'm talking to my POI tomorrow and I'm waiting for the letter so I'll have more info. Luckily I don't mind making decisions, I just dislike the waiting I have to do haha.

Yeah I'm planning on rejecting Oregon, I'm not even sure if they do have a wait list or not! And I do want to accept but I also want to make sure that I'm not missing any opportunities. I'm going to wait until its the beginning of April to send an email and ask for a status update.

I would either wait to see if any of the other schools will fund you or work for a couple of years then reapply.

I'm not dreading the actual drive at all! My boyfriend and I drove from Virginia to Alaska so I'm sure we can handle any distance ha. Its just the packing/unpacking stuff thats going to suck.

I wouldn't take out loans because you already have 90K. I agree with @juilletmercredi

Yeah I wouldn't take an unfunded offer, no matter how good the program is. I would ask your friends if they are willing to foot the bill since they want you to go so badly. I'm also an undergrad too so I get the pressure on trying to figure things out before graduation. But I don't see how you could burn bridges unless you are extremely rude. If it doesn't work out this cycle, there's always next year!

I would go for UCLA. Best case situation for UCSD is that you spent 10,000 and ended up in a phd program. Worst case is that you don't get in and then you have to reapply to other schools. It seems like a silly risk to me.

It sounds more than reasonable to me! Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they get a free pass on taking advantage of you, What I would do is give them a hard deadline for when you are leaving. Then leave/resign on that date. If they didn't take you seriously and they didn't hire anyone thats on them. Sometimes we have to firmly establish boundaries with our families.

I would check the website, my two acceptances had the decisions uploaded before an email was sent out.

I don't have experience in your field but I wanted to help out! I saw in your post you said you weren't excited to do research but it would be "okay". I would say be careful to avoid falling into a trap. My boyfriend had the same idea, he wasn't excited by research but he thought it would be alright. He realized that wasn't the case and withdrew after one semester. This was a combination of his awful advisor, courses were limited, and he realized he actually hated research. So tbh if you are feeling iffy on research then you should try out a funded masters first. Its much easier to walk away from a masters than a phd program. Or thats at least my experience from my friends/peers.

I don't think you need to go heavy on the emotion. They should know its a possibility that you will choose another school or not go to grad school at all. I would just say "Dear Dr. X, Thank you for taking the time to talk to me and show me around the program. This program and the people within it are wonderful scholars and people. I'm emailing to inform you however, that I have chosen another school for my graduate studies. I look forward to future correspdonce and seeing you at future conferences." Sincerely, @ciistai

Where my boyfriend and I live now is very cheap as well! We are in a 2 bedroom in a duplex on a quite safe street for 500 a month. So Lubbock will be a little more expensive but not that bad ha. Plus its a smaller city and we aren't huge fans of big cities. So everything has worked out!

I toyed with the idea of taking time off from undergrad then going to grad school in a couple years. I would have to say that my boyfriend had an impact on my decision. His parents aren't in the best of health, so we decided that it would be best if I could finish my studies as soon as possible so we could eventually move near them to help out. Plus I've worked in museums, so I know what I want to study. Also with just a bachelors, I would hit a glass ceiling very quickly. I already have an admit I'm excited about. I would have taken a job over grad school if I couldn't afford it though. In my case there wasn't an actual reason to put off grad school except for just putting it off.