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justacigar

*I is stressed* venting thread for Fall 2020 Applicants

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15 minutes ago, justacigar said:

Welp, got my first official rejection today! I suspect 3 more are coming my way as well. There is something oddly comforting about it being official, no more uncertainty! Woo!

 

This is exactly how I felt last year when it started getting late enough in the cycle that it was obvious as to what was happening. At a certain point you just want to hear something no matter what the news is.

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18 minutes ago, justacigar said:

Welp, got my first official rejection today! I suspect 3 more are coming my way as well. There is something oddly comforting about it being official, no more uncertainty! Woo!

 

I agree about the odd comfort of an official rejection! I need the other schools I'm expecting one from to jump on board hahaha

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22 minutes ago, Schy said:

I agree about the odd comfort of an official rejection! I need the other schools I'm expecting one from to jump on board hahaha

Exactly! It's so much better than the uncertainty. 

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Posted (edited)

So hard not to catastraphize things at this point. Logically, I know that schools are still probably on holiday break and may not pick up again until next week, but my brain keeps telling me I should be preparing for the worst

Edited by Aghhhhh

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11 minutes ago, Aghhhhh said:

So hard not to catastraphize things at this point. Logically, I know that schools are still probably on holiday break and may not pick up again until next week, but my brain keeps telling me I should be preparing for the worst

Me too. I'm mentally preparing for a third cycle. Better to be pleasantly surprised instead of utterly disappointed! My hopes are not high at all, lol. Hang in there! We've done all we can do with our applications, it's out of our hands for the moment. 

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20 minutes ago, justacigar said:

Me too. I'm mentally preparing for a third cycle. Better to be pleasantly surprised instead of utterly disappointed! My hopes are not high at all, lol. Hang in there! We've done all we can do with our applications, it's out of our hands for the moment. 

That's exactly the mindset I'm in! 7/8 of the programs I applied to haven't started contacting anybody yet, so I really just need to cool my jets, but I feel like going in with the mindset that I won't get any interviews will hopefully make a lovely surprise if it does happen (fingers crossed). 

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12 hours ago, Aghhhhh said:

So hard not to catastraphize things at this point. Logically, I know that schools are still probably on holiday break and may not pick up again until next week, but my brain keeps telling me I should be preparing for the worst

I know, it's like my brain won't accept the most obvious reality that my schools aren't sending invites this week... in the past they haven't started until next week at the earliest. Yet I'm still like "better check my email at 4:30am just in case one came through after 10pm last night!"

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Why does it feel like everything is slowed down this year 😅 I'm not sure if it's because I haven't heard from many programs or what, but even the forum seems a little quieter 😭 

 

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I got an interview invite from a PI----but with no indication of a deadline or respond by date. I'm holding out because it's for the same date as my top choice. I don't want the PI to think I ghosted them, but I also worry if I send back a general "Thank you so much, I'm working on coordinating my schedule and will get back to you," that they'll get annoyed with me. Any thoughts? 

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1 hour ago, andhowdoesthatmakeyoufeel said:

I got an interview invite from a PI----but with no indication of a deadline or respond by date. I'm holding out because it's for the same date as my top choice. I don't want the PI to think I ghosted them, but I also worry if I send back a general "Thank you so much, I'm working on coordinating my schedule and will get back to you," that they'll get annoyed with me. Any thoughts? 

I did that & got a favorable response. Unfortunately I don’t think I’m going to be invited to my top choices so I’m getting anxious to accept the invite but I don’t want to cancel later if my top 3 choices do end up inviting me. 

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I'm having a hard time fantasizing about programs smh. I start daydreaming and visualizing myself in a few of my top choices. I know it's bad to get hopes up, but never doubt the power of manifestation right 😅🤦🏽‍♀️

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37 minutes ago, Justice4All said:

I'm having a hard time fantasizing about programs smh. I start daydreaming and visualizing myself in a few of my top choices. I know it's bad to get hopes up, but never doubt the power of manifestation right 😅🤦🏽‍♀️

OMG me! At one point, I found myself googling living costs/apartments in the areas of my top choices and looking into some real-winter clothes during the holiday sales (I live in the westcoast and my top choices are up in North or East). I really had to give myself a harsh invisible slap to snap out of it.

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2 hours ago, Justice4All said:

I'm having a hard time fantasizing about programs smh. I start daydreaming and visualizing myself in a few of my top choices. I know it's bad to get hopes up, but never doubt the power of manifestation right 😅🤦🏽‍♀️

I feel this! I spent about an hour watching campus and town tour videos for my top choices last night so it’s even easier to visualize now.

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Okay, let me preface this with saying I'm incredibly sorry if this makes me sound like a total ass. It is absolutely 10000% not my intention to sound ungrateful, and I know that hearing nothing but rejections is by far the worse scenario. I've just been really overwhelmed lately, and I'm hoping some of you will be able to empathize. 

I currently have 4 interview invites with the possibility of a 5th, and it's really stressing me out. I have a pretty solid top 3, and the other 2 schools have a slightly different focus that I didn't realize would be less of a fit until after I submitted my apps and got to talk to some of these PIs. The interview dates are all within days of each other, and I simply don't have the stamina for that much cross-country travel. The constant emailing back and forth, the skype calls, the travel arrangements, it's so overwhelming!! It's especially hard to find the energy when I suspect that some of these schools may not be the right fit for me. Of course, I'm incredibly blessed to be in this position in the first place, but man, just having a few rejections to narrow it down would seriously give me peace of mind right now. I guess it goes to show that with this crazy a process, even being "lucky" comes with its own stressors!!

I've seen past applicants say they had upwards of 5-10 interview invites-- how the heck did yall manage it?! I feel like I'm going to go insane from it all...

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19 minutes ago, imemine said:

Okay, let me preface this with saying I'm incredibly sorry if this makes me sound like a total ass. It is absolutely 10000% not my intention to sound ungrateful, and I know that hearing nothing but rejections is by far the worse scenario. I've just been really overwhelmed lately, and I'm hoping some of you will be able to empathize. 

I currently have 4 interview invites with the possibility of a 5th, and it's really stressing me out. I have a pretty solid top 3, and the other 2 schools have a slightly different focus that I didn't realize would be less of a fit until after I submitted my apps and got to talk to some of these PIs. The interview dates are all within days of each other, and I simply don't have the stamina for that much cross-country travel. The constant emailing back and forth, the skype calls, the travel arrangements, it's so overwhelming!! It's especially hard to find the energy when I suspect that some of these schools may not be the right fit for me. Of course, I'm incredibly blessed to be in this position in the first place, but man, just having a few rejections to narrow it down would seriously give me peace of mind right now. I guess it goes to show that with this crazy a process, even being "lucky" comes with its own stressors!!

I've seen past applicants say they had upwards of 5-10 interview invites-- how the heck did yall manage it?! I feel like I'm going to go insane from it all...

I have 2 and I’m concerned that they may not result in any offers (had 2, 2 years ago & no offers). Why don’t you focus on the ones at the top of your list & decline the others. There are so many qualified applicants here hoping for a chance & it would be very kind of you to give them that chance if you’re not really interested in the program. 

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26 minutes ago, imemine said:

Okay, let me preface this with saying I'm incredibly sorry if this makes me sound like a total ass. It is absolutely 10000% not my intention to sound ungrateful, and I know that hearing nothing but rejections is by far the worse scenario. I've just been really overwhelmed lately, and I'm hoping some of you will be able to empathize. 

I currently have 4 interview invites with the possibility of a 5th, and it's really stressing me out. I have a pretty solid top 3, and the other 2 schools have a slightly different focus that I didn't realize would be less of a fit until after I submitted my apps and got to talk to some of these PIs. The interview dates are all within days of each other, and I simply don't have the stamina for that much cross-country travel. The constant emailing back and forth, the skype calls, the travel arrangements, it's so overwhelming!! It's especially hard to find the energy when I suspect that some of these schools may not be the right fit for me. Of course, I'm incredibly blessed to be in this position in the first place, but man, just having a few rejections to narrow it down would seriously give me peace of mind right now. I guess it goes to show that with this crazy a process, even being "lucky" comes with its own stressors!!

I've seen past applicants say they had upwards of 5-10 interview invites-- how the heck did yall manage it?! I feel like I'm going to go insane from it all...

First of all — congrats on the interviews! I talked to several people who were applying to medical school and PhD programs last year for Fall 2019 and the individuals that had 4+ interviews always mentioned how overwhelmed they were. From the cost of flights, to traveling, to missing work and having to play catch-up afterwards, they hated it! At the end of the day, it really is about fit, so definitely decline any offer for a school that you don’t see yourself at for the sake of your sanity. Mental health is VERY important through this process. Good luck! 

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2 hours ago, imemine said:

Okay, let me preface this with saying I'm incredibly sorry if this makes me sound like a total ass. It is absolutely 10000% not my intention to sound ungrateful, and I know that hearing nothing but rejections is by far the worse scenario. I've just been really overwhelmed lately, and I'm hoping some of you will be able to empathize. 

I currently have 4 interview invites with the possibility of a 5th, and it's really stressing me out. I have a pretty solid top 3, and the other 2 schools have a slightly different focus that I didn't realize would be less of a fit until after I submitted my apps and got to talk to some of these PIs. The interview dates are all within days of each other, and I simply don't have the stamina for that much cross-country travel. The constant emailing back and forth, the skype calls, the travel arrangements, it's so overwhelming!! It's especially hard to find the energy when I suspect that some of these schools may not be the right fit for me. Of course, I'm incredibly blessed to be in this position in the first place, but man, just having a few rejections to narrow it down would seriously give me peace of mind right now. I guess it goes to show that with this crazy a process, even being "lucky" comes with its own stressors!!

I've seen past applicants say they had upwards of 5-10 interview invites-- how the heck did yall manage it?! I feel like I'm going to go insane from it all...

I agree with what the two people above have said, decline the interview invite if after talking to/emailing the PI(s) you do not feel like the program is the right fit for you. I think it is a red flag if you already sense that a program may not be right for you before even going to visit the campus/department! And other qualified applicants may love to have that spot, so if attending every single interview will be way too much of a strain to your mental health, I would definitely only visit the departments that you are most enthusiastic about. 

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7 hours ago, clinicalpsych.2020 said:

If the University of Rochester sends me one more email about why I should choose their program for grad school before rejecting me or inviting me to interview, I am going to go crazy 😂

FSU keeps doing this to me.. So frustrating when you don't even know if you will be getting an interview invite in the first place. 😅

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10 hours ago, andhowdoesthatmakeyoufeel said:

I got an interview invite from a PI----but with no indication of a deadline or respond by date. I'm holding out because it's for the same date as my top choice. I don't want the PI to think I ghosted them, but I also worry if I send back a general "Thank you so much, I'm working on coordinating my schedule and will get back to you," that they'll get annoyed with me. Any thoughts? 

I would just be honest and say that you are waiting to hear back from other schools, and that you are wondering if you could have some time to make a decision before getting back to them. 

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Has anyone heard back from the cognitive psychology program at Penn State? I'm really stressed about not having heard back from any place :(

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On 12/24/2019 at 6:29 PM, MiddleOfSomeCalibrations said:

I just had my first "unofficial rejection" (interview notification deadline passed and I didn't hear anything from them). Kinda bummed but oh well. I'm stressing more about the fact that I haven't heard anything from a school where the POI's research interests match with mine *extremely well*. A few people here have already heard back from that school, but I haven't heard anyone say they heard from my POI yet.

Welp, same!

And it was with a PI who was extremely excited with what I've done so far.

Can't help but be demotivated, because keeping in mind my financial situation, I might not be able to apply (it's already my second round) again for at least a couple of years. 😕

Also sucks that I keep getting ads for OSU everywhere?

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2 hours ago, 2ndTimeHopeful said:

Is it safe to say this is the week of truth?!?!?

I personally found it helpful to look back at last cycle's results to get a general idea of when each of my schools release their invites. Although it felt a bit insane to be scrolling through pages and pages of results, it ultimately eased a lot of stress as I now know that most of my schools e-mail in mid/late January. Good luck ☺️

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